You are the only person that can make a choice. In life we never know what's going to happen, so there is no right or wrong choices. Just two different paths.
Would you be happy to live in anxiety not knowing whether he would do it again ?
Has he reassured you that it would never happer again, and do you feel confident about this?
If he loves you, he should respect you and show his committment to you, because you deserve it.
Would you be able to forgive your boyfriend/girlfriend for this? watch
- 08-02-2010 14:58
- 08-02-2010 15:00
I wouldn't be able to forgive him.
(Original post by Anonymous)
- 08-02-2010 15:11
I have been with my boyfriend for a year now and am absolutely crazy about him. We have had our share of ups and downs over the year but overall he makes me so happy.
On friday I found out that on a night out a few weeks ago in a club he kissed and was all over a random girl. I found out because I saw this number on in his phonebook when trying to call our friend called 'Liquid girl' (liquid is a club where we live). I asked him about it, I knew he was lying and so I text her (which he let me do I might add) and basically got all the information from her I needed.
She told me she had being talking to him upstairs for alot of the night, he bought her drinks and they got with each other. When I found out I naturally hit the roof, called him all manner of things, broke up with him and told him I hated him. The annoying thing was I was staying with him and his family for the weekend and due to circumstances couldnt leave until tonight. So all weekend I had to listen to him go on and on about everything. He claims he remembers absolutely nothing about it, he says he woke up the next day with this number in his phone and that was it. ( I would have usually assumed this was utter ******** though I'm unsure from the fact that he let me text her).
Im absolutely devasted and don't know what to do. I have two options, dump him or not?
I have thought about it long and hard and have had contrasting opinions from friends and family and have came up with the reasons to stay with him or to leave him
Reasons to leave him:
-He cheated on me and the trust is totally gone
-He never told me about it (although he claims he didnt know anything had happened
-Im scared that had things went differently he could have ended up going home with her (though I know he didn't as she has told me this)
-I don't know if I can ever be sure he won't do it again
Reasons to stay with him:
-It is totally out of character for him. I have spoken to a mutual male friend (who I am closer to) that he goes out with quite a bit and he says he never chats to or tried to get on girls on nights out and has never seen him do anything like that before
-Some say everyone is allowed one mistake
-I still am very much in love with him despite hating him right now
- He does seem genuinely sorry and gutted, he has cried several times over the weekend, says it was a one off stupid mistake that will never ever happen again. He has told me he hates himself for it and that he will do whatever it takes whether that be not getting drunk when Im not there if that makes me feel better
-He didn't sleep with her
-I know he could not have been attracted to her as I got her to add me on facebook and I know this sounds awful but she is EXTREMELY unattractive, I mean horrendous.
So it is. I'm torn. We are broke up for now. I want to see how hard he will chase me and how hard he will try and get me back and this may help me decide whether or not we're over for good. Any advice would be so helpful as I can't decide right now what I want to do?
- 08-02-2010 15:39
It would absolutly be game over for me.
- 08-02-2010 16:03
No question really. Someone cheats then it's over..move on.
- 08-02-2010 17:34
I'd forgive him :/
- 08-02-2010 17:38
Leave him, this is bound to happen again. Once a cheater always a cheater.