Was I silly to stay friends with this person?

My sister and I were reminiscing last night about our school days and I mentioned thi one friend I had and something that happened while we were at school.

I'd been friends with this person for a long time (outside of school) but while we were in school, we always acted like we didn't know each other. I was friends with the geeks and nerds (and was very unattractive), and she was with the 'in-crowd' i.e. your typical River Island girls who spent Saturday nights downing White Lightning and Lambrini. While all these girls were busy sleeping with people from the age of around 13, my friend didn't, but I don't think it was that she didn't want to. We had an exam coming up once though, and my friend asked me to go round hers to revise. I went, but it just turned out that she wanted us to sleep together. It wasn't that she liked me per se, but she just wanted to lose it. I said no, for various reasons (one being that we were only 14), and we just ended up making out and stuff.

A couple of weeks later at school though, I ended up telling my best friend what had happened, but someone overheard and it spread into this rumour across the school. My friend denied though because of how embarrassed she was about the prospect of people thinking she'd sleep with someone like me, and I came away from it looking like a deluded schoolboy with a crush on her (she wasn't even that pretty).

I got over it though, and while I'm not really close to her anymore as we go to different universities, at the time I carried on being friends with her.

I told my sister about it though, and she said I was stupid for just getting over it like that and should have a) made sure people knew the truth and b) cut her off. Not that it makes any difference now, but what should I have done?

Reply 1

Lethal Hamster

Well you probably should have made sure people knew the truth if it bothered you that much. Which it obviously has because your still thinking about it now, but if you think your friendship with her was worth more...

Reply 2

this charming girl

You don't sound silly, just like a really kind person who cares about people... even incredibly selfish people. You probably thought it would hurt her more for people to know the truth, and also maybe to lose your friendship, than it would hurt you.

Reply 3

llys

No, that's just one of those stupid things kids do. Come to think of it, adults probably do it too. I wouldn't worry about it if I were you.

Reply 4

Meh.

You sound like a good person, with obviously more self-respect and confidence than her. If it didn't get to you, then clearly you were just the bigger man in the situation. I can't say it wouldn't have affected me, and whilst I probably wouldn't have bothered spreading the truth around either, I would deeply struggle to remain friends with someone like that.

Was I silly to stay friends with this person?

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