Posting as anon because I don't feel too comfortable under my regular ID.
So, I've been noticing for the past few weeks the body language of the girl who sits next to me in History. She's been touching my arm - sometimes playfully punching -, rubbing her arm up and down my back (again, calmly) and when I've jokingly said that hitting me on the arm "hurts" when it didn't she laughed and 'rubbed it better'.
Now, considering these factors and that I find her really attractive, I'm considering asking her out. Though there are multiples snags: first, last year she went out with a relatively close friend of mine and they ended breaking up. They are friends now, but I'm worried what the consequences would be of me going out with his former girlfriend.
Second, I've never been in a relationship before and am therefore a total novice. I am worried that I may make the wrong move, or not be outgoing enough, because my speech tends to stutter a little when I'm around her and my hands shake. I therefore have to be constantly aware of what I'm doing.
Third, I'm extremely worried about the impact it would have on my education and the longevity of relationship itself. With the former, would my interests become divided and my focus therefore less? My parents have always said that work is the most important thing, but I would like to think there can be a balance. And considering we're both planning, and down right trying our hardest, to start university this summer wouldn't it be hard to maintain a relationship when there is such a distance apart (going by out first choices, Leeds and Liverpool).
Finally I've asked if she can help me out with some History work this week, which is a genuine question. I was thinking of asking her, if we agree a date to meet, how she would feel about starting a relationship. However considering all of the aforementioned issues, and the fact that I'm nervous about a negative consequence of rejection, I'm unsure.
Note, when answering if you could address each issues point-by-point I would appreciate that.
To ask or not to ask? Watch
- Thread Starter
- 09-02-2010 20:40
- Thread Starter
- 09-02-2010 23:18
- 09-02-2010 23:24
i personally wouldn't ever touch a friends ex. if i had to though i'd at least ask the friend first.
if its your first relationship you are bound to make lots of mistakes. FACT. you have to make them sometime though so that might as well be now.
relationships rarely affect work. and i know a good few people who only got together a few months before uni yet are still very much together. if your relationship lasts the next 7 months, then its worth trying to make it work at uni. stop bloody worrying
and dont ask her how she would feel about starting a relationship!! ask if you can take her out to dinner. go on a couple of dates, kiss a few times at least. THEN ask her out
- 09-02-2010 23:34
just do it..
- 09-02-2010 23:38
Tell her your arm is actually located on your penis, she'll rub that for you
The signs are clear, ask!
- 09-02-2010 23:40
You probably wont regret asking her, you will definatly regret not asking her.