Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Muslim - Pressure to get in Relationship Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I am feeling under pressure to get a girlfriend despite being a muslim. Im in my 2nd year of medicine at university. In typical university life people are expected to get in to a relationship. I am a good looking and confident guy and I could get a girlfriend if I wanted to but I don’t attempt to. A lot of my male friends who are not muslim initially are shocked at my lack of interest in girls, also some muslim guys are always trying to get girls. I sometimes feel like I am considered odd in someway for refraining from showing interest. My girl friends and new girls I meet also find it strange when they find out I don’t have a girl friend or show no interest in getting one. I dont see why I have to justify myself to anyone, surely there are catholic and jewish people in their early 20's in the same position. I have 4 more years of university and I am starting to feel the social pressure. Its not as if I am gay or anything or that I couldn’t get a girlfriend, in fact a few girls have tried to express their interest. I feel people are categorizing me as a bit strange rather than respecting my stance on no sex before marriage.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    No, noone is expecting you to get into a relationship. If you're strong-minded enough yourself you do not need to get into a relationship just to please others, be happy how you are! Yeah, your mates might be shocked that you don't want to get into a relationship but you could easily just put that down to personal preference. :dontknow:. If you really feel the need to get into a relationship, then it's of course upto you, but really you should only do it because you want to and not because others expect you to.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    why 'despite being a muslim'? why is that of consequence?

    if you want a gf, get one, but the temptation to **** may be too great for you :rolleyes:
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by dichr0ic)
    why 'despite being a muslim'? why is that of consequence?

    if you want a gf, get one, but the temptation to **** may be too great for you :rolleyes:
    agreed...being a muslim is irrelevant in this instance...you could be hindu but the bottom line is that you do not wish to have a girlfriend
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    "I feel people are categorizing me as a bit strange rather than respecting my stance on no sex before marriage."

    Bull

    Being in a relationship doesn't automatically mean you have to have sex. What a dumb thing to say
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Tsoert)
    "I feel people are categorizing me as a bit strange rather than respecting my stance on no sex before marriage."

    Bull

    Being in a relationship doesn't automatically mean you have to have sex. What a dumb thing to say
    interesting

    i shall discuss this later
    Offline

    2
    As a personal real life example...There was social pressure for me to smoke weed and do some coke but I didn't give in...It's against my beliefs/morals and I don't bow down or arse kiss anyone because of a bit of peer/social pressure
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    X
    Don't give in to this temptation. Understand that Allah is testing you and if you pass this test then you will be rewarded. The benefits of abstaining from these relationships outweigh any temporary satisfaction you get from following this path.

    Ignore what others say because in today's age any muslim who sticks to his religion is deemed to be strange by others. After all this life is a prison for the believer so keep you focus on the hereafter. It will help in the temptations you face.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Don't give in to this temptation. Understand that Allah is testing you and if you pass this test then you will be rewarded. The benefits of abstaining from these relationships outweigh any temporary satisfaction you get from following this path.

    Ignore what others say because in today's age any muslim who sticks to his religion is deemed to be strange by others. After all this life is a prison for the believer so keep you focus on the hereafter. It will help in the temptations you face.

    i agree!! keep it up MashAllah, i'm a girl and i feel the same way too!!
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Casse)
    Don't give in to this temptation. Understand that Allah is testing you and if you pass this test then you will be rewarded. The benefits of abstaining from these relationships outweigh any temporary satisfaction you get from following this path.
    Nah he isn't

    Seriously I don't think it really has much to do with Islam...I know loads of Muslim guys who get with more girls than non-muslims. Do whatever makes you happy, if that is following fairy stories or if it is getting in a relationship...whatever feels right
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    "Being a muslim" isn't irrelevant because getting a girlfriend IS WRONG for a Muslim to do, especially if the person believes.

    The Muslims who say other wise are generally looking for excuses to get around this.

    Kudos for the OP at holding firm - remember that you are acting on what you believe is right and that is a good thing.

    Sexual attraction/urges are a natural thing though and the best way of avoiding falling into the trap of relationships and sex outside marriage is to not put off marriage too long - there is an end of the road past which you will struggle with self control.

    (Just because it is good it does not make it right.)
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    bump
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: February 11, 2010
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Brexit voters: Do you stand by your vote?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Write a reply...
    Reply
    Hide
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.