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    Anon or Delete please.

    I don't know why im even writing this, my mind is blank and I am struggling to think logically, so this might be the best constructed thread ever, I apologise. Please, useful comments only.

    I found out I was pregnant 3 days ago, im 17. Needless to say, I was shocked. We did use protection, it must have split.
    Fortunately, my boyfriend (only person who knows) said he would support my decision, whether I opt to have an abortion, keep it or even adoption.

    We are both going to Uni later this year (different ones), which having the baby would make things very difficult not to mention the financial strain. When it comes to Abortion, I don't like the idea of it, I couldn't, but it seems the best option. I know, alot of people will think I must be cold hearted to think that, but it is. Deep down, I want to keep it but my education would be put on hold, social life would come to a stop and it would make everything very, very difficult.

    I can't make a decision, I just can't. I really don't want to result in having an abortion, I would never forgive myself. I can't sleep, eat and find it hard to act like everything is okay around people, because its not.


    What would you do in my situation? Yet again, please, only useful comments. Thank-you
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    You need to get professional advice, talk it through with someone who knows what they are talking about and can counsel you through whatever choice you go on to make. Thats what I would do in your position.
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    i think i would have the abortion but then again maybe im biased cause i dont like nor want kids

    you are only young, you have ages to have kids, put yourself first and get a future for you THEN have a baby when you can financially support it
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    Well, since you're asking, in your shoes I would have an abortion. But that us only because I have no real desire to have children, just the thought of it makes me a bit nauseous!

    The decision is down to you. Perhaps, if you don't want an abortion, but feel that you could not raise the child, then you could consider giving it up for adoption? You have to do whatever you feel would be best, both for you and for the child.
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    think what you want..to go to uni or to have a baby..also what would your mama say?? because u have to involve parents too if you plan on keeping the little one..
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anon or Delete please.

    I don't know why im even writing this, my mind is blank and I am struggling to think logically, so this might be the best constructed thread ever, I apologise. Please, useful comments only.

    I found out I was pregnant 3 days ago, im 17. Needless to say, I was shocked. We did use protection, it must have split.
    Fortunately, my boyfriend (only person who knows) said he would support my decision, whether I opt to have an abortion, keep it or even adoption.

    We are both going to Uni later this year (different ones), which having the baby would make things very difficult not to mention the financial strain. When it comes to Abortion, I don't like the idea of it, I couldn't, but it seems the best option. I know, alot of people will think I must be cold hearted to think that, but it is. Deep down, I want to keep it but my education would be put on hold, social life would come to a stop and it would make everything very, very difficult.

    I can't make a decision, I just can't. I really don't want to result in having an abortion, I would never forgive myself. I can't sleep, eat and find it hard to act like everything is okay around people, because its not.


    What would you do in my situation? Yet again, please, only useful comments. Thank-you
    Well if you go away to uni, and he is at a different one I would assume that either the baby would be with parents or with you and a day centre, which would prove very expensive.. actually thinking about it, the later would be out because of the age. And also if you have only found out the 9months wont be at the best time either..

    Realistically I dont think you could continue with education, maybe until the child is in school, and 4 years down the line I dont know whether youd want to go to Uni, plus I know many parents that stay unemployed just in case.. Theres not much I can say as this is 100% YOUR decision, and I KNOW youve thought long and hard about it. But remember that your social live will be minimal if you go through it, and not wanting to sound horrible, but I also know of many couples that have split within the first year of childbirth, leaving you alone at what will probably be 18 raising a child.

    Best of luck whatever route you choose, and if you ever need some Welsh help !
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    it must be an extrememly hard decision and i sympathize. however, you need to think logically in the circumstances. a child not only takes an incredible amount of time and money, but also need a huge amount of support from both parents. do you have the financial secuity for toys, medicines, baby things etc etc? new maternity clothes? a house? a cot? you need to think what would be best for a child - and also you have to think about your relationship and if it would last etc.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by emanuel_arsenalfc)
    think what you want..to go to uni or to have a baby..also what would your mama say?? because u have to involve parents too if you plan on keeping the little one..
    She wouldn't be impressed. Im trying to blank out what other people would do or think, so that it doesn't affect my decision. Wether this is the right thing to do, im not sure.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
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    Thanks for the advise
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She wouldn't be impressed. Im trying to blank out what other people would do or think, so that it doesn't affect my decision. Wether this is the right thing to do, im not sure.
    you were really unlucky with the condom split but these **** kinda happen all the time..
    yeah i think thats a good idea..you still have to figure out how you'd support that baby and also if you do abort it, whether the guilt will get over you
    • #2
    #2

    Not that i think its right, but an abortion seems the most sensible idea.. however, remember some women who have abortions then go onto regret it for the rest of their lives. I personally think 17 is too young to be a parent..but then again you would be bringing a child into the world, and it could be the best that'll ever happen to you.. so i honestly dont know what i'd do in your situation. Just make sure whatever decision you make, you dont live to regret afterwards. good luck, and god bless
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    Difficult, yet easy decision. An abortion is probably the best option if you consider what's best for you.

    You're only 17 and will have enough things dragging you down in life as it is as you go through uni, without having a child to look after too.
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    Whatever you decide, you have to think of the long-term consequences.

    Abortion isn't a short-term solution, a decision like that will live with you for the rest of your life. The same as having and raising a child, and giving a child up for adoption.
    • #3
    #3

    Just sending some hugs tbh :hugs::jumphug:
    • #4
    #4

    abortion definetly ... if u keep the kid u'll end up ruining both yours AND the kids life cuz the kid wont be brought up in a "settled" environment! ...
    • #5
    #5

    Do whatever you feel is right hun. I found out that I was pregnant 3 days after my 17th birthday and I did not know what to do. The timing couldn't have been more terrible, my boyfreind and I were rocky, my parents were getting divorced and I was going to be moving an hour away with my Mum so I wouldn't be near my bf and friends, I had no money and no one wanted me to keep the baby so I had no support.
    There were basically no good points to me keeping the baby, apart from the fact that I wanted to. But I just couldn't do it. I was scared. I wanted my baby to have a father because I never did. I wanted to be married and have a good job and a proper family and give my baby the life that it deserved. So I had the abortion. It wasn't a nice experience I won't lie to you. I was depressed for months and I will probably never get over it. But now, two years on I've just got into uni to be a midwife Before, I couldn't be around babies without feeling sick and wanting to cry. But now I'm fine. I've just come to terms with the fact that what I did was right and I've got over it the best I can. I see babies all the time and I'm not unhappy. I did the right thing.

    Basically, ignore what everyone tells you to do. Do what YOU want. Write a list of pros and cons of keeping the baby, chat with your boyfriend about how you are feeling and see how he feels about it. You will have to delay uni until next year or the year, would this bother you? Ask yourself lots of questions and then decide what to do. Hope this helps xx
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Just sending some hugs tbh :hugs::jumphug:
    Thanks

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Do whatever you feel is right hun. I found out that I was pregnant 3 days after my 17th birthday and I did not know what to do. The timing couldn't have been more terrible, my boyfreind and I were rocky, my parents were getting divorced and I was going to be moving an hour away with my Mum so I wouldn't be near my bf and friends, I had no money and no one wanted me to keep the baby so I had no support.
    There were basically no good points to me keeping the baby, apart from the fact that I wanted to. But I just couldn't do it. I was scared. I wanted my baby to have a father because I never did. I wanted to be married and have a good job and a proper family and give my baby the life that it deserved. So I had the abortion. It wasn't a nice experience I won't lie to you. I was depressed for months and I will probably never get over it. But now, two years on I've just got into uni to be a midwife Before, I couldn't be around babies without feeling sick and wanting to cry. But now I'm fine. I've just come to terms with the fact that what I did was right and I've got over it the best I can. I see babies all the time and I'm not unhappy. I did the right thing.

    Basically, ignore what everyone tells you to do. Do what YOU want. Write a list of pros and cons of keeping the baby, chat with your boyfriend about how you are feeling and see how he feels about it. You will have to delay uni until next year or the year, would this bother you? Ask yourself lots of questions and then decide what to do. Hope this helps xx
    Thanks very much for your post, it's nice to hear from someone else who was in my position.
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    If it was my girlfriend, though i'd honour her decision, i'd try to sway it towards an abortion. At this age, we're not financially stable, emotionally stable and don't have the time (if we want to proceed to Uni etc) to keep a baby.

    They'll be loads more pros/cons. Think; would you like to raise a child to which you can't afford, and would have to ruin the rest of your life to keep alive?

    Harsh, but truth.
    • #6
    #6

    I had a pregnancy scare when I was 16 and I found myself thinking what I would do. I don't think I would be able to have an abortion because off all the people out there who want a baby so much but struggle to have one, I may consider adoption but I don't think I could put myself through the process. So my choice would be to keep the baby, I know it sounds harsh but you got into this situation and you have to deal with it your way and my way is by being a mum to the baby I brought into this world. Hope this helps and don't worry because deep down you already know and you will make the decision that is best for you xxxxx
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    I think you need to go to a local health clinic, where they can give you more advice, rather than on a forum like this.

    But, if I were in your position, I'd have an abortion. You're 17, you've got your future ahead of you, and I you sound like you don't really want this baby, because you know what it may mean for you and your plans.

    Good luck - if you ever need to vent, feel free to PM me :hugs:
 
 
 
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