how to prove to my boyf we can work long distance?

my boyf and i are in an ldr and havent seen each other for 5 wks.
i really love him, but have been doubting our relationship for various reasons, as has he.
the last few days though, i've realised just how much i want to be with him. the only problem is the distance.
we find the 3 or 4 weeks apart at a time so daunting.
we broke up before i came to uni bcos the distance would be hard, but got back together after 6 wks or so because we realised we were meant to be together.
it's so hard being apart from him, and neither of us are really happy. but we also can't be happy if we broke up.
how can i prove to him that we can work long distance, atm we're having a few days with no contact to see if we can appreciate each other more so we don't argue less, but he said he's going to see how he feels after these few days about whether we can actually work.
arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!

Reply 1

BlueRoses

See each other more often?

Reply 2

metrostation22

you need to show him that you are still there for him regardless of the distance. cutting off contact is likely to just worsen his feeling tbh as he will always be thinking about it and so will you. try skype? seeing and talking to each other is good :smile:

. send him texts everyday now and again just so he knows you are thinking of him. hard as it might, try not to get upset or pick at things, this will make him feel even worse. even if you dont feel happy yourself (its hard to in a ldr, i know!!) just try for his sake. encourage him to have fun where he is an plan things for when you next see each other. send each other silly things and just try and have as much fun as you can :smile:

Reply 3

Purple_flowers

metrostation22

well the thing is, i'm quite a... needy person. if i dont hear from him or he doesn't tell me he loves me for a few days i go all weird and think he's not into me anymore. it's mad.
we text alot, a few times a day, but he lives on the isle of man & i'm in england so it's really difficult to see each other as it involves getting the ferry lol.
and if i'm upset i tend to pick fights with him, i dont know why though.
it's just stupid.
i'm kind of worried he doesn't want to see me at all. he's meant to be coming next wkend as i've a mate here this wkend, but i know what he is like. when he's not happy he prefers to be on his own & if he doesn't come over, i think it may be it... hmmm.
i don't know what to do.
i'm gonna give him til tomorrow night, and if he's not got in contact with me by then, just send him a msg to see how he's doing. do you think that's best?
i want to show him i'm independant aswell, and i want to give him his space...

Reply 4

metrostation22

yeah yeah i know what you mean, it is really hard :frown:

. the thing with being needy is that you could unintentionally drive him away - this may in fact be the reason he is having doubts, because you are picking fights with him through your insecurities. i cant tell you just to stop being needy, because i understand it is difficult! but try try try to stop yourself everytime you feel the need to say something needy/picky. just stop and think what if he said that to you? it will take a while for you to become less clingy but you CAN do it :smile:

. you must remember you need to enjoy your life as well as your boyfriend, and if you are constantly worried about whats hes doing/thinking, then this will reflect on your behaviour too. yeah give it till then, keep it casual and friendly. PM me if you wanna chat or anything :smile:

Reply 5

devotchka_

I'd say if he needs convincing then his heart isn't in as much as yours is. And it needs to be balanced to work.

Just tell him exactly what you've said here.