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Am I right to feel a bit miffed? watch

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    My brother is 28, and is in the process of buying a house. He's been on ~£33k/year (if not more) for the last 5 or 6 years. He's lived at home and paid £20/week rent. He works away monday-friday so his hotel & food is paid for him by his employer.

    He's saved £6.5k, which is enough for a deposit, however if he finds another 5% (house if £130k), his mortgage will go from £600/month to £450. His solution has been to ask my Mum & Dad. They've scrimped and scraped for years, worked hard to provide a roof over our heads & the occasional holiday. 5 years ago my Nanna died, leaving roughly £13k inheritance, and 3 or so years ago my Dad was made redundant and given about £3k. Obviously they've spent some of it - new bay window (best part of £2k), new carpets, decorating, new central heating, nice holiday etc, and saved the rest. Now my brother wants them to lend him pretty much all they've got left.

    I can't help feel upset that he's asking (and will be taking, albeit repaying it over a few years) for money. They're very close to 60 and he's taking everything off them for his own needs. Why can't he find the moeny himself, and be responsible? He's spent his money on ridiculous things - cars (bought a TT for £10k, sold it 6 months later. He got it on finance and my parents lent him the money to pay that off so he could sell it). He buys 3 or 4 DVDs per week, bought himself a PS3 & nice big HD telly for it, spent £450 on a shirt, trousers & a jumper.

    Am I right to be upset that he's been irresponsible and is now taking pretty much everything my parents have? I know he'll be repaying it, but that will take time. My parents should be able to enjoy their money, instead he's sending them back to square one.

    Opinions?
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    *bump* to move it up the page a bit.
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    I understand your concerns, which seem completely founded.

    Will your parents not demand a fee for the lending the money so that everybody wins?
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    your parents are mature enough to make a rational decision, surely?

    If he chooses to be a bawler then thats his decision, not yours...


    As long as he's good for it and your parents make a rational decision you don't have any say in the matter.
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    Personally it sounds like he is lying through his teeth, 5% deposit mortgage is very tough to get and there is no way that another 5% will slash more than a few quid off the monthly repayments. For first time buyers most mortgages have a bare minimum of 10% deposit. The economy is still fragile and anything could happen with house prices, including a steep downward slide.

    Regardless your brother should not be asking for money, it is not on. Especially when they do not have a huge amount, he is taking all their savings, what if he loses his job? He should be responsible and should be saving, if he can't afford the current mortgage then he cannot afford to buy a house. I think your parents need to see the mortgage proposals and also make sure that their contribuion is protected.
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    (Original post by daytona01)
    your parents are mature enough to make a rational decision, surely?

    If he chooses to be a bawler then thats his decision, not yours...


    As long as he's good for it and your parents make a rational decision you don't have any say in the matter.
    Yep, they are mature enough. But he's the 'middle child' - he's always been the moody selfish one. If he doesn't get his own way, he ignores you, simple as. They're always going out of their way to help him. They'd NEVER help my oldest brother or me to this extent. Whether or not he's good for it is questionable - he'll be paying £450/month mortgage, gas, electric, council tax, rates, etc. He apparently had a lot more than the £6k he currently has, but spent "hundreds" (read over a grand) on his girlfriend at Christmas.

    ed_jnr - no, they won't demand a fee, and nothing will be in writing.
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    The figures don't sound right to me. You say your brother has been earning £33,000 p.a. for 5 years and has ONLY saved £6500

    If these figures are correct then how will he manage to buy a house. Where has the £100,000 disappeared to?
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    (Original post by steve2005)
    The figures don't sound right to me. You say your brother has been earning £33,000 p.a. for 5 years and has ONLY saved £6500

    If these figures are correct then how will he manage to buy a house. Where has the £100,000 disappeared to?
    The figures are wrong as is is impossible to get a mortgage for the amounts stated.

    But where the OP states her bro is earning £33K per year this is his total income before tax. £100K has not dissapeared it has been used for tax and general spending etc, the £6.5K is only what has been saved from this.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yep, they are mature enough. But he's the 'middle child' - he's always been the moody selfish one. If he doesn't get his own way, he ignores you, simple as. They're always going out of their way to help him. They'd NEVER help my oldest brother or me to this extent. Whether or not he's good for it is questionable - he'll be paying £450/month mortgage, gas, electric, council tax, rates, etc. He apparently had a lot more than the £6k he currently has, but spent "hundreds" (read over a grand) on his girlfriend at Christmas.

    ed_jnr - no, they won't demand a fee, and nothing will be in writing.
    refer to line two,

    If he chooses to be a bawler then thats his decision, not yours...
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    Let me get this straight.. He's 28 and has been earning over 30k for at least the last 5 years, yet decided to stay living at home with his parents, only paying £20 a week for the privilege?

    What a ******* loser.
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    (Original post by RosiePeriwinkle)
    The figures are wrong as is is impossible to get a mortgage for the amounts stated.

    But where the OP states her bro is earning £33K per year this is his total income before tax. £100K has not dissapeared it has been used for tax and general spending etc, the £6.5K is only what has been saved from this.
    SORRY for slight exaggeration. Over 5 years a person with a gross income of £33 000 p.a. should be able to save at least £50k, particularly when living at home and paying £20 per week.

    The brother is an idiot.
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    (Original post by RosiePeriwinkle)
    Personally it sounds like he is lying through his teeth, 5% deposit mortgage is very tough to get and there is no way that another 5% will slash more than a few quid off the monthly repayments. For first time buyers most mortgages have a bare minimum of 10% deposit. The economy is still fragile and anything could happen with house prices, including a steep downward slide.

    Regardless your brother should not be asking for money, it is not on. Especially when they do not have a huge amount, he is taking all their savings, what if he loses his job? He should be responsible and should be saving, if he can't afford the current mortgage then he cannot afford to buy a house. I think your parents need to see the mortgage proposals and also make sure that their contribuion is protected.
    He's gone through a financial advisor, who is organising everything from mortgage, survey etc. I was surprised, but then financial advisors know more than I do on that subject. I couldn't understand how an extra 5k could take 1/4 off his monthly repayments.

    He's usually out of work at this time of year - his company lays him off for 2-3 months while there's not much work (he's an electrician) and take him back on again (he doesn't bother signing on, he's too proud), but this year it's others being laid off while he keeps his job.

    I don't think he should buy it either, he's too irresponsible with money. Even if he does, it'll take him 3-4 years to pay my parents back.
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    he should grow up and get his priorites right, stop spending money on things he doesnt need and save more for his house
 
 
 
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