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If your life wasn't going to plan, would you consider suicide? watch

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    (Original post by darkphoenix341)
    I was in a similar situation as yourself and I'll tell you how I coped.

    First off the money thing follow the advice they give you about making minium payments until you can afford to pay it all back.

    Second if you only get partial funding you may qualify for an access to learning fund.

    Third contact the university and tell them what has been going on. I know it may seem embarrassing or daunting but a lot of students go through this so they are used to it. There may be a chance you could catch up with your work or take a leave of study and try again next year.

    Fourth maybe a deep discussion with your dad might help. If you explain how you've been feeling he may be more sympathetic than you know. I know you may not want to tell him because you may feel like a failure or something but hey we're only human and we all make mistakes what's important is that we learn from them.
    Thank you. It's nice to be able to talk to someone who has been through the same thing.

    With the access to learning fund though, don't i have to be attending university to get that? Because i've stopped going wont they deny me a chance to get it? The debt adviser told me to talk to a student welfare officer who'd talk to my halls of residence and draw up a plan to pay rent. However i'm worried that because i don't go in to university anymore they wont be able to help.

    I'm really worried about talking to my dad about it. I mean, he'll be furious. He had to find out via letter (i mean, it's got this far), how much in debt i am.

    I've missed so much of uni, i've only handed in essays until november. I'm worried that they wont let me back.
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    (Original post by Phobia27)
    My life is definitely not going to plan at the moment, but I'm not going to jump ship and commit suicide just because things have gone wrong. If everyone did that, humans will be extinct within the decade.

    Nothing is irreversible, you can get out of these debt problems you are facing. Firstly, you need help (I see you have been phoning a debt helpline, which is a start) but you also need to talk to your family about this. It doesn't necessary mean talking to them will mean they'll bail you out of your situation, it just helps that you get an second opinion on your problems. Looking at problems at different angles can help solve them a lot more, not to mention the morale support you can get. There is only one shot at life (contrary to religious texts..) which makes it all the more important to solve your problems instead of running away from them.
    I hope i can get out of the problems. However surely the impact of it is going to stay with me for a while (credit ratings)? I'm really worried about talking to my family, especially my dad. I might try to pluck up the courage to talk to my mum about it tomorrow.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'd change my name, cut all my ties and go somewhere else.
    Not the best idea if you're running away from problems.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you. It's nice to be able to talk to someone who has been through the same thing.

    With the access to learning fund though, don't i have to be attending university to get that? Because i've stopped going wont they deny me a chance to get it? The debt adviser told me to talk to a student welfare officer who'd talk to my halls of residence and draw up a plan to pay rent. However i'm worried that because i don't go in to university anymore they wont be able to help.

    I'm really worried about talking to my dad about it. I mean, he'll be furious. He had to find out via letter (i mean, it's got this far), how much in debt i am.

    I've missed so much of uni, i've only handed in essays until november. I'm worried that they wont let me back.
    Well I suppose you need to be attending university for the ALF but then you have to ask yourself could you realistically catch up with the work you've missed? Again you'd be better discussing it with the university as they can give you more options. Each course varies as does its workload. The university might not let you back to continue for this year but they won't kick you out completely. But please you really need to inform them of everything they'll be more understanding and helpful than you would expect.

    As for you dad I'm guessing he's old school (like mine). Well I'm not going to lie it will be hard. The letter is good. I'm not good about talking about my feelings either and have often communicated with letters. The only thing you could do is admit you messed up and take the nagging (sometimes you just have to jump in the deep end). You're young you will make mistakes some big, some small. I bet you dad did too when he was young. But worrying about telling him will only you make you ill.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yes, at the beginning of term he said that he would help me pay for my rent, as i told him it was going to be more expensive than it had been previously. However, when i asked him to help me out he said that he didn't have enough money.

    The thing is, if i went home I'd feel like such a failure. I'm scared that my relationship wiht my dad would deteriorate also.
    Why would that make you feel like a failure? It means you're taking responsibility for your debts and doing your utmost to clear them asap. Maybe your dad will feel a bit of a failure for not being able to give you the promised financial support?
    If you're serious about this stop accumulating rent bills so you know exactly what you have to pay back, without any more debts mounting up. I don't mean to sound harsh but it's time you faced up to reality. The sooner you recover from this lot then you can consider your options. Maybe you would like to return to uni in the future. Even if you have to self fund it's not impossible. Get yourself a job, any job, no matter how menial to show your family you're doing your bit.
    This is just a small hiccup in the grand scale of things so don't get it out of proportion.
 
 
 
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