Friends went on holiday without me

I know that this might sound pathetic, but it's really upset me.

Theres a group of us that are really close, well id consider these three girls my best friends. There another girl as well, who im not close to anymore but the others are. Anyway, went on facebook to find an album showing them all on holiday together this week.

I texted my friend asking why i wasnt invited and she said that they thought i was busy, it was only last minute, and its 'awkward' with me and the other girl.

I've been going through a very rough time recently, and i really need my friends. Also, i though her argument was slightly flawed- why would there be any other reasons (it was last minute, the other girl etc), if they thought i was busy? To me, the busy thing sounds like an excuse, and after all, it would have been very easy to have texted me to check

This wouldnt even bother me so much if it wasnt for the fact that ive been planning my birthday party all week. Its a close thing, and i was looking forward to spending it with my close friends, celebrating. The thing is, now i dont even know if they are my close friends. I mean, i thought they were, but id never have gone off for the week and not asked one of them. Its not even like we're a big group of friends or anything.

So yeah, am i overreacting? And what should i do about my party? Should i just get over it, or let them know how upset i am? Thanks in advance x

Reply 1

robofish999

Hey Gwen. I kind of know how you are feeling. I went on holiday with 4 friends last year and I know that 3 of them are organising a holiday abroad with some other boys. Nobody has invited me and I even did all the organising for the holiday last year.

I'm not sure what you should do about your party. If you have plenty of other friends you should go ahead I think. Invite the 3 girls mentioned (if they are back) to show you aren't spiteful like they are.

You sound like a nice girl (and you are Welsh too :smile:

) so good luck babe x

Reply 2

shadowbook

hah. exactly the same things happened to me :/ im just trying to suck it up and pretend that im not bothered, why not try patch things up with the other girl so in future it wont be so awkward for any one? x

Reply 3

procrastinator11

OP

1

Haha yeah thanks guys probably will have the party
The ironic thing was, i was going to try to patch things up with this girl before i knew about them going away... now i just kind of feel bitter about the whole thing, which bothers me
i feel now whateve i do, my birthdays ruined...

Reply 4

MancBoy

12

Maybe they consider you as the ugly one so they thought you would taint the image of the group...just a thought :smile:

Reply 5

Yas89

**** them!

live your life and realise that some friends will probably screw you over throughout your life

only people you can truly trust is family

Reply 6

aeterno

15

I know how you feel - happened to me last year. So I pretty much spent the summer alone :frown:

Don't let it get you down so much and definitely don't let them ruin your birthday! It's your birthday and you have every right to enjoy yourself, with or without them.

I hope everything works out for you and try not to feel so bitter towards the other girl either :smile:

Reply 7

RealityIsDull

13

it could have been the girl who you don't get on with who suggested the thing? and there fore after all your friends wouldn't want to invite you for fear of awkwardness....

Just make up with this other girl and you'll be fine. Don't take it to heart!

Reply 8

heidigirl

17

I know completely how you feel. I had a similar experience when I was at school; I found out that my best friend had gone on holiday with one of her other friends, and hadn't invited me or even told me she was going. Her excuse was that her mum had invited the other girl so she couldn't say no, but I think what hurt most was not that she hadn't invited me (I mean if that was the genuine reason I think I'd have understood-all it would have taken was 'I'm sorry, but we can do something else another time') but that she hadn't mentioned it. It was the whole going behind my back thing that upset me the most, especially when I only found out because the other girl said something in front of me.

That fact that someone doesn't tell you someone is a pretty big clue that they know they're doing something wrong.

I mean saying they thought you were busy is a poor excuse; so they didn't even think of asking you?

I think you have every right to feel hurt. I'd bring it up with them if I were you, but try not to come across as accusing (Eg, 'I felt really upset...' rather than 'You really upset me...'; just let them know how you feel and try and clear the air. Then see how you feel about inviting them to your party.

Reply 9

procrastinator11

OP

1

Thanks guys. Really good advice!
Yeah thats what i thought, theyre all on contract, it would have taken all of 5 mins to text to check if i was busy or not.
And it wasnt the girl who im awkward with who suggested it, it cant have been. They stayed at my other friends (the one i texted) house in the country.

Reply 10

T-go

2

This has happened to me, my friends are all going on holiday this year and no one has invited me.
don't worry about it, it will all get better.

Reply 11

oaktrees

I really think that was a horrible thing to do. Similar things have happened to me, you just have to find other things to do/look forward to etc. I know that is rubbish advice but I found that focusing on my work sort of helped, got a bit of a kick out of getting good grades when they were failing...and also I became better friends with some other girls, who are actually nicer, kinder and far less b*****y people.

Reply 12

xxxClarebearxxx

Yeah that sucks. I mean maybe they did think you were busy and so didn't say to you but normally you'd ask anyway or at least mention it. To be honest it's probably the "awkward" reason, because if it was just because they thought you were busy they wouldn't have mentioned that as a reason. I'd tell them you're upset about it, because after all it is a holiday, it's not as if they just went to the shops without you or something. But have a proper chat to them about it, that way you'll either sort it out for your party or not in which case you can change your plans slightly. Lol girls can be funny sometimes. Good luck!

Reply 13

Mgreen13

2

Omg this happened to me today that’s why I’m here and when they said they were going on holiday together my heart fell through the floor. My mum just died and I’ve been relying on them for the past year only for them to pull a stunt like this. Maybe organise a holiday with some ppl they don’t know or just play it cool and don’t stoop to their low (I’m probs too late just for anyone else in this situation) they also used the last minute and we thought you were busy excuse

Reply 14

Mgreen13

2

Christ I’m 9 years late lol

Original post by Mgreen13

Omg this happened to me today that’s why I’m here and when they said they were going on holiday together my heart fell through the floor. My mum just died and I’ve been relying on them for the past year only for them to pull a stunt like this. Maybe organise a holiday with some ppl they don’t know or just play it cool and don’t stoop to their low (I’m probs too late just for anyone else in this situation) they also used the last minute and we thought you were busy excuse

Friends went on holiday without me

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