Awful Christmas Cracker Jokes

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Infinity
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#41
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#41
(Original post by JabberJaw)
Dang

My joy lasts about as long as my luv life,5mins and its all over.

It don't take long to unwrap socks,socks and more socks.


Dang 15 minutes
I never said I was impressed w/ what I got, I don't see a porshe in the driveway.
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JabberJaw
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#42
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#42
(Original post by Infinity)
I don't see a porshe in the driveway.
Best part of today for me was driving home in my 2.5 V6 Ford Cougar.

A nice brand new porshe on my driveway would have renewed my faith in christmas.

Sayin that we should all be greatful for what we got.i know i am.
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Infinity
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#43
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#43
(Original post by JabberJaw)
Best part of today for me was driving home in my 2.5 V6 Ford Cougar.

A nice brand new porshe on my driveway would have renewed my faith in christmas.

Sayin that we should all be greatful for what we got.i know i am.
Mine too, I have lost the holiday spirit, well all faith in my relatives anyway.
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JabberJaw
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#44
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#44
Bring on the New Year,another over rated part of the calender.
Usual folk drinking way too much,people pretending to n-joy themselves saying next year will be different.

I was once blessed because,My father was lucky enuff to spend new year(1996) with us b4 he died.

Everyday is a day to cherish not just the 31st of december i say.
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Infinity
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#45
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#45
(Original post by JabberJaw)
Bring on the New Year,another over rated part of the calender.
Usual folk drinking way too much,people pretending to n-joy themselves saying next year will be different.

I was once blessed because,My father was lucky enuff to spend new year(1996) with us b4 he died.

Everyday is day to cherish not just the 31st of december i say.
I couldn't agree more.
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snow_white
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#46
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#46
well we're going with the same old lame old christmas jokes are we? hmm i had quite a few bad ones yesterday, so many, in fact too many to count, heres an especially stupid one.
Q. what happened to the frog when his car broke down?
A. he got toad away!
i don't think those people should have quit their day jobs.
snowy
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Brown Patrick Bateman
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#47
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#47
(Original post by snow_white)
i don't think those people should have quit their day jobs.
snowy
Rumour has it Penguin pay people to spend time making up the jokes.

Why am I still up at 6.30am?...found a tape of classics from 1991 Remember Martika? 'I wanna sex u up'... Prince's 'Get Up'...
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Nylex
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#48
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#48
Q: What can't be untied?

A: A rainbow.
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LH
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#49
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#49
Best cracker joke ever:

Why did the farmer call his horse 'Blacksmith'?





Because he kept making a bolt for the door!!!!
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Sire
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#50
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#50
(Original post by Lord Huntroyde)
Best cracker joke ever:

Why did the farmer call his horse 'Blacksmith'?





Because he kept making a bolt for the door!!!!
Lovely. Do like that one mate.
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serendipity
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#51
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#51
(Original post by Sire)
Lovely. Do like that one mate.
Someone needs to get out more...
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LH
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#52
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#52
(Original post by serendipity)
Someone needs to get out more...
It's a good joke from a quality cracker.
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YouKnewThat!
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#53
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#53
Hmm not sure about cracker jokes, but the worst jokes ever are on the penguin chocolate bar wrappers... I think I had one like:

Where do penguins live?

In Igloos.


:confused: :rolleyes:
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riffraff
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#54
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#54
hmmmm- kind of late now but.....


Q: can you tell the difference between an elecphant and a letter box. no?

A: well im never sending you out to mail my post




Q: What did the girl call her pet egg?

A: Egbert
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