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feeling depressed and weird

hi. i'm waiting for my a level results which will determine whether i get into uni.
since i had my last exam (and through the exam period i guess, so since finishing school) i have been feeling fine one day then really depressed the next. i keep crying for what seems like no reason and just feeling like ****.sometimes i lose my appetite/feel sick. i think its cos of results and uni but im not sure.. i dont understand. i think i want to go to uni, to get a degree and stuff as its "the right thing to do" and i dont want to go and get a full time job now without better qualifications anyway and certainly dont want to be stuck where i live now.
but im also really sceptical about it, i'm frightened i guess, about meeting people and that i will be lonely or something. i keep feeling like i dont fit in where i live now, i have 4 really close friends which is good but everyone else i feel like they wouldnt care if i wasnt here anyway. that sounds stupid as the 4 friends that are really good mates i love them all and i should be grateful. but i just feel like if it wasnt for them, i would really have no one. i dont know, im just being stupid.
one of them said she also keeps crying for no reason and just feeling down. i wish i didnt keep feeling like this as its stupid. i'm going to work 4 days a week to try and keep busy, and see friends when i can, although 2 of the close ones are away. i went out last night down the pub with 1 of my close friends and the rest "friends" but didnt enjoy myself. i felt kinda left out and that i had nothing to contribute. its stupid as i never used to feel like that all the time and talked and stuff anyway.
at work i dont really get on with the people there (i work in a care home) i just have nothing in common with them, and i think they think i;m really sad or something? not sure. i just worry about uni everyone either wont like me, or will say they like me but not really care. i try and make an effort with people and want to get along with people, and i havent had trouble making friends in the past, i just suddenly feel all inaquate and strange.
i dont know why im posting this half of you will probably just give me -ve rep for being depressing :frown:

i just had to write it somewhere or ill go mad.
ill probably wake up tommorow and think what was i going on about, im fine.. but in a while ill feel depressed again and yucky. should i be worried or just hope that i return to "normal" once results are out or something? does anyone else feel like me? i kinda dont know what i want to do with my life and not sure where im going.
sorry for being really annoying and thanks to anyone who actually reads this :s-smilie:

Reply 1

G.A.K

Aww. I can only empathize with you. I read all of it and I think it's possibly the results that is preoccupying you. I get like this sometimes as I'm waiting for my AS level results and this will determine my university choices, so; like you, there is a lot of importance in them. All I can say is, cheer up. Everyone will be in the same situation as you when you get to university. Am sure you won't be isolated!
Maybe, you've realised how much you will miss when you go to university and this is depressing you, as you think in your mind you have become detached from your friends. I'm sure they don't think you're "sad". Maybe you should lighten up a touch (not to be nasty), because there are so many people out there with worser things happening to them. I think it will work out for you, you're off to uni, can make new friends, I bet you'll do well in your results (and even if you didn't you'd still get into a Uni), you can focus on your career.
Just try to have fun, because when you get your results and they're cool :biggrin:

then you'll wonder why you were so worried and dodged up your long holiday!
Maybe you should organise something with all of your friends - then you'll know you contributed....round them up and go out and have fun....it's definitely results that is bothering you. You probably feel pressured like I do!
I'm sorry I might sound patronising, but I bet it's August 18th that's the underlying issue, and it's depressed you, thus all the other things are linked back to that.
Your friends think you're great I bet!! :smile:

Smile

Reply 2

Glory

the worse thing possible happened to me last year, my exams were totally messed up and i didnt get my degree place. My uni gave me a hnd place and after a year of hard work im back on the degree.

So even if things go really bad, its not the end of the world cos you can still acheive things.

Reply 3

adamu

thunderstorm its this period we are in where we simply exist but for very little reason, waiting for our fate which lies in an envelope. Just live in comfort knowing that soon your life will change forever

Reply 4

thunderstorm

hi thanks.
you're all right. i know, i sound stupid as there are many worse off than me. i feel really selfish sometimes for feeling ugh! i totally agree with reply 4, just waiting. i think all of you are right! thanks. i feel a bit better now. if i feel funny again in next 2 weeks i'll re read this :smile:

good luck to all of you in everything :smile:

results/jobs/whatever ur doing.

Reply 5

Sophdoph

I think because you are in a period of change and in limbo between different parts of your life it's easy to feel lost. Without having a firm grounding and place you can easily feel confused and depressed. Try and keep active and eat healthily, if you need to cry don't stop yourself. Results is an emotional time and it's understandable that you may be upset some times.

Don't let others make you feel down, you sound really lovely and caring and remember that. Keep positive and do things that you enjoy, with it other people or by yourself.

Reply 6

G.A.K

ack, ok now I feel depressed.
RESULTS! :frown:

Reply 7

thunderstorm

thanks for all your advice. im glad im not the only one who feels like this (well im not glad we're all upset, but you know what i mean :P) at least i dont feel such a freak. i know i should just focus on each day as it comes and do something i enjoy or get on with something. im going to work today and hopefully cinema with a friend afterwards so i will try and keep busy. i bought the sims 2 the other day (+university expansion :|) so that will keep me busy on boring days , lol! i really hope that come results day ill stop feeling so weird, its horrible and a bit worrying. ive lost weight in the last month which is worrying me too as im pretty skinny as it is :s-smilie:

i just dont feel hungry, i must try and eat more. ate a load of muffins yesterday evening, !!
thanks again to everyone and good luck with all your results :smile:

Reply 8

Lirael Abhorsen

i know how you feel, i just keep feeling depressed and thinking about death and stuff and feeling confused and displaced. i think part of the problem is there was so much to occupy us during exams and now we have lots of free time and quite often dont go out so much and staying indoors often makes me feel ill and depressed. make sure you go out for at least an hour everyday even if its just taking a walk or whatever, and don't stay up too late cos that just puts you into an out of synche lifestyle which is not good for you either!

Reply 9

Hoofbeat

I too felt similar last year after about Easter when I didn't see the point of school...we were just revising - why couldn't I do that on my own at home?! I had started to grow apart from my friends knowing that in a few months we wouldn't see each other and we'd all be living different lives off at Uni/Gap Years etc. I felt stuck in a rut and just felt kind of...BLURGHHHHHHHHH and I felt like each day was pointless with nothing to look forward to. It was only after my exams that I realised everyone else felt the same - the truth is you ARE ready to move on and leave school behind etc, but at the time you don't realise it. It's understandable that you're apprehensive about your results and what the future may hold, and unfortunately there's probably not much you can do about that at the moment (your fate's already decided so try not to think about it too much)....I can't offer much advice only sympathy and tell you that last year I was exactly the same (and having spoken to my uni mates they felt pretty much the same!) and that after results day you'll know where you're going and can start to look forward and plan it. Once you get to Uni and its freshers week you'll certainly be 100% happier and you'll make loads of new friends and have lots of fun. These few months are probably going to be one of the hardest times of your life, as you're in between stages. As Britney Spears once sang...."I'm not a girl, not yet a women" and in my mind that sums up this period of your life exactly.

Reply 10

Clare1986

I feel exactly the same. Some days when i wake up i think what is the point in getting up that day because i just feel like i dont have a purpose at the moment. All i am thinking about is August 18th and its making me so unmotivated some days, unless i know i have something lined up for that day. Its such a weird feeling.

Reply 11

Adarah

I really understand you. Only that all of my three best friends are busy. One of them I haven't heard from in months, she just left to travel around Indonesia, China and Thailand, the other has a full time job until 12 at night and at the weekends she wants to be with her bf and the other has just moved to some small village somewhere to spend a year there and is really busy. And I don't really feel that close to the others, they just annoy me lately, I mean, totally annoy me and I sometimes feel a bit down, other times I'm fine. But I keep worrying. As soon as one problem is solved I worry about another, right now I'm scared that something has gone wrong with that stupid EU5N form and that I won't be able to study at uni at all this year because it's been messed up or something - it's probably fine though, but I can't help worrying about it :frown:

.
I think you will feel much better once you're at uni, as you'll be so busy you won't have time to worry and you'll also realise that everyone there will be trying to make friends and you won't have a problem finding close friends.
I find just taking random trips around the country helps - the other day I got on the wrong train towards some town in the Czech republic I'd never heard of and had to try and get back to my station without the right ticket and run away from the ticket inspector - :p:

it was something to take my mind off things. Then I just went into town on a sunday and walked around aimlessly, that was fun too, hehehe... nice Italian boys :wink:

. Best thing is just to go out and enjoy the summer weather. :smile:

Reply 12

adamu

at least your girlfriend didnt just dump you and you feel the most lonely in your entire life :frown:

Reply 13

Gexko

i've been feeling like that on and off for most of the time since i got back from my gap year travels in april.

i've found i've felt better since i've been thinking about uni and chatting to people going to the same uni on here.

everyone gets worried about exam results and stuff like that, just find some stuff to keep you occupied. a job, exercise, socialising, endless tsr ( :eek: