Friends and Going Out.

How easy is it to say to your friends "nah, don't feel like going out?"

Do they just accept it and go "oh, okay" or do they keep pressing you for answers because they think they 'should' know why you don't feel like going out.

I know one or two of my friends is going to want to say "hi" today and meet up with me - it's been happening a lot lately and this is the one day none of us have work. And yeah, I'm glad they're my friends and I shouldn't feel so ungrateful, yadda-yadda-yadda, but one of them I've seen every single day this past week. And pretty soon, we're going to run out of things to talk about.

I just don't feel like going out today at all, and it's no reflection on what I think of my mates (I'm not angry or upset with them or anything, which is what they'll think and ask) but I don't want to have to make an excuse for not going out. I shouldn't have to. People should be able to say "don't feel like it" without other people pressing them for why.

Re-reading this I sound like some sort of big-headed idiot :smile:

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Reply 1

flick

No I thinks it's normal, everyone needs some time to themselves. I think that friends should be able to accept this :smile:

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Reply 2

TKR

15

you should be grateful you have friends and stop being so unrgrateful! :p:

Just kidding, if they're good friends they'll understand that you need some chill out time - I'm sure they will!

Reply 3

lostinfantasies

OP

2

Some people tend to get so offended though. If you say "oh I just don't feel like it" or "I need some time to myself" they'd go "ohh, why?" or "oh, okay" in a tone that just makes you feel guilty. *groan*

Reply 4

Amlea

1

Just tell them u need space to do what u wanna do.

Reply 5

saz_1989

2

Everyone needs alone time. They should understand. Alternatively tell them you have a 24 hour bug and keep projectile vomitting. They'll keep away and you won't hurt their feelings.

Reply 6

buttons7

1

lostinfantasies

How easy is it to say to your friends "nah, don't feel like going out?"

Do they just accept it and go "oh, okay" or do they keep pressing you for answers because they think they 'should' know why you don't feel like going out.

I know one or two of my friends is going to want to say "hi" today and meet up with me - it's been happening a lot lately and this is the one day none of us have work. And yeah, I'm glad they're my friends and I shouldn't feel so ungrateful, yadda-yadda-yadda, but one of them I've seen every single day this past week. And pretty soon, we're going to run out of things to talk about.

I just don't feel like going out today at all, and it's no reflection on what I think of my mates (I'm not angry or upset with them or anything, which is what they'll think and ask) but I don't want to have to make an excuse for not going out. I shouldn't have to. People should be able to say "don't feel like it" without other people pressing them for why.

Re-reading this I sound like some sort of big-headed idiot :smile:

.

i'd say it was pretty easy. if they ask questions just give them an honest answer... mine are usually along the lines of "much as i love the rock, the shittiest nightclub in cirencester - nay, the world - i'm afraid i have neither the money, the energy, nor the possibility of making it all seem more entertaining by drinking (because i drive) so i can't join you tonight." and that actually is an excuse that i use quite often, because if you have ever been to the rock in ciren, then you will know that it is not a vair amusant place to go.

Reply 7

*starry_eyed_*

14

I HAVE to have "me-time" :biggrin:

Reply 8

Lush Law

15

Oh god if I say I don't want to go somewhere I become inundated with texts asking why and ridiculous comments like "it'll be crap without you". Also, if I do go out and I'm not my usual animated/centre of it all self I get told I'm being moody or depressed :eek:

Meh, I'm not best pleased with my friends at the moment.

Reply 9

xXMessedUpXx

15

just tell them yu're "busy" or that you can't afford it, or hey, that you don't feel like it. If they are good friends they will give you some space, but ake sure you say that you can meet-up another time. That way it's not so bad.

Don't worry yourself hun :smile:

Reply 10

john !!

14

"dont feel like it" would work for going out at night, eg. to a club or something, but in the day it would probably sound weird, like you have something agains them

just say you are tired or have no money, then seal it with something like "Ill see you another time soon yeah?" so they know there's no space for bargaining.

Reply 11

buttons7

1

red_roadkill

Also, if I do go out and I'm not my usual animated/centre of it all self I get told I'm being moody or depressed :eek:

Meh, I'm not best pleased with my friends at the moment.

i hate it when people do that. i'm usually pretty lively, but if i go out when i'm not really in the mood, i find that alcohol has no effect on me whatsoever, so all my friends get really ******ed and i usually: a) fall asleep (including on the floor in clubs), or b) end up reading a book (i usually have one with me, because i am that sad). and then everyone spends the whole evening doing their drunken best to find out what's wrong with me. which just annoys me more.

Reply 12

zhivago

2

Lauren

Everyone needs alone time. They should understand. Alternatively tell them you have a 24 hour bug and keep projectile vomitting. They'll keep away and you won't hurt their feelings.

Lol!

Yeah, I need me-time as well, the thing is though, I seem to be the only one in my group of friends who can amuse myself (no sniggers please!) - everybody else gets really bored really easily! Most of the time I want to go out, but there's nothing wrong with saying 'no' every now and then.

Your friends are acting rather insecure and petty. Just tell them that it's nothing personal (why would it be?); but you just feel like staying home this time.

Reply 13

Lirael Abhorsen

1

some friends need a lot of attention.. but yeah sometimes i dont feel like doing stuff, but in that case i just say i don'thave transport or am doing something else etc... and arrange a date later in the week

Friends and Going Out.

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