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How true? - boys are only friends with girls if they fancy them? watch

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    welll... me and my best friend were girl (me) and boy (him)...lol i dont know why i said that but still its quite a funny explanation. we insisted that we didnt fancy each other but both blatantly fancied the other like mad. finally we got together and 16 months later we are still together and planning to get married next year.
    so...i would say that it is possible, but if you decide to get together, it makes a better relationship than most.
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    i dont agree :p:
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    We've had this conversation many a time and I've always posted the following link which I will do again?

    www.laddertheory.com
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    (Original post by SJ No.18)
    We've had this conversation many a time and I've always posted the following link which I will do again?

    www.laddertheory.com
    this is gd.. worth reading
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    I think in a male-female relationship someone will fancy the other at some point, even if it's just mildly - especially if it's close. My best friend is male, and I had a huge crush about a year ago, however, I've since found out he's gay so I think the friendship is probably stronger without a sexual element.
    Moral - because of sex, all male/female relationship will get overly friendly eventually.
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    Not reading the whole thread but what a load of crap.

    If you really believe that guys only make friends with girls because they want to have sex with them or because they're attracted to them, then you're most likely the kind of guy that makes girls think that we're all absolute ****s!!

    I have a number of female friends, of which I would be completely comfortable doing anything with and not thinking "Oooh I want to have sex with her" :rolleyes: - they are my FRIENDS....not girls I want to shag!! Plus, my best friend is female, and we've never even come close to pulling or anything like that, we're great friends, go out clubbing together, pretend we're together if some random weirdo comes onto either of us (usually her), and so on....I don't fancy her, we're just best friends

    So no, your theory is crap....apart from for stupid guys who all they want is sex and will probably have the brain capacity of a woodlouse :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by dobbs)
    Not reading the whole thread but what a load of crap.

    If you really believe that guys only make friends with girls because they want to have sex with them or because they're attracted to them, then you're most likely the kind of guy that makes girls think that we're all absolute ****s!!

    I have a number of female friends, of which I would be completely comfortable doing anything with and not thinking "Oooh I want to have sex with her" :rolleyes: - they are my FRIENDS....not girls I want to shag!! Plus, my best friend is female, and we've never even come close to pulling or anything like that, we're great friends, go out clubbing together, pretend we're together if some random weirdo comes onto either of us (usually her), and so on....I don't fancy her, we're just best friends

    So no, your theory is crap....apart from for stupid guys who all they want is sex and will probably have the brain capacity of a woodlouse :rolleyes:
    that's not what you said on Sunday.........:afraid: :p:
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    SO NOT TRUE. i have loads of guy friends who i do not fancy and i'm sure they don't fancy me. unless you have an IQ of 50 it is perfectly possible to have a real friendship without a sexual attraction.
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    I think it could go either way, I suppose there are plenty of true friendships that don't involve a romantic attraction, but I think they are outnumbered by people who ARE romantically attracted.

    I think a major problem (and this is going to sound VERY old fashioned) is that there comes a point when you have to decide whether or not an opposite-sex friendship is appropriate, regardless of whether or not you are romantically/sexually attracted to each other. As you get older "couples" hang out more with "couples" for more than a few reasons.

    I personally used to have a lot of male friends, but I intentionally distanced myself from them after being in a relationship for a few years. I did so out of respect for my boyfriend, and because it began to feel inappropriate to go out alone with a male friend. Basically, they wouldn't be my friends if I didn't trust, admire, and respect them and those are qualities that can easily be confused with lust or love when combined with liberal amounts of alcohol.

    Regardless of how much I trust my boyfriend I wouldn't want him to go cry on the shoulder of a single female friend if we had a fight. Who cares whether or not they are attracted to each other, it still would make me uncomfortable. Thats why I think opposite-sex friendships are a feature of a single-lifestyle. When you are unattached you are free to fancy whomever you please, secretly or otherwise, so whether or not you are attracted to your friends doesn't matter. When you are attached its a question of respect and therefore it STILL isn't important whether or not you fancy a friend because you should no longer be putting yourself in a position where it matters.

    Am I straight out of the 1950s? Maybe so. I have always liked poodle skirts.
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    (Original post by dobbs)
    Not ogreat friends, go out clubbing together, pretend we're together if some random weirdo comes onto either of us (usually her), and so on....I don't fancy her, we're just best friends

    So no, your theory is crap....apart from for stupid guys who all they want is sex and will probably have the brain capacity of a woodlouse :rolleyes:
    Possible reasons for your supposed lack of attraction

    1) You do not find her physically attactive
    2)You are gay
    3)You are dating better

    Or you are just denying your feelings, if she offered you it on a plate, you telling me you would come out with some rubbish like "I dont want to destroy our beautiful relationship" if you think she is hot you would hit that no doubt.
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    (Original post by Poica)
    I think in a male-female relationship someone will fancy the other at some point, even if it's just mildly - especially if it's close. My best friend is male, and I had a huge crush about a year ago, however, I've since found out he's gay so I think the friendship is probably stronger without a sexual element.
    Moral - because of sex, all male/female relationship will get overly friendly eventually.

    One of my best friends is a girl. Shes mad as a brush though :p: however given that im as mad as a hatter we get along great im gay shes straight, and she could never get the subtle hints I dropped until I told her that i was gay and shattered her hopes of dating a dashingly handsome bloke
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    I have a g/f from outside my college, and have many female friends within college, who I have no intention of going out with, and who I don't even find good-looking.
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    I have a couple of hot female friends. Strictly platonic though.
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    I don't think I can really hack having close female friends. I'll always have mates who are girls, but they're just people you know who you get along with.

    I have never had a female friend who has been as close or closer than my male best friends and who hasn't been, or ended up as, a girlfriend.
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    I've got quite a few close female friends but i only fancy one of them and that's only because i've fallen in love with her personality. But i do think that some guys do hang out with fit girls just because they're fit.
    Certainly at my 6th form, all the 'cool' guys hang out with the fit girls and i don't think its just a coincidence!
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    i dont think its true, my bf has quite a few friends who are girls who i know he doesnt fancy- at least i hope not. anyway, if its true, should all guys break up with all their female friends when they are in a relationship?
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    It might not be true initially, but become true later on. Assuming you don't judge by looks, you can become friends with a girl solely just to have a friend, and then eventually find you fall in love with her (personality). Although some guys may subconsciously look for good looking female friends but then they're just shallow, innit?
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    noooo.....
    there are 3 main reasons why guys are friends with girls in this age range:
    -they have a general interest in beings friends with her despite how she looks
    -they look like "The Man" to their male friends, therefore their rep increases
    -they make other girls jealous e.g. sigh, i wish he were talking to me instead of that ugly biyatch!
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    I have a few good close female freinds, who everyone thinks I like because they are 'well fit'. However they are genuinly the most gorgeous personalityed girls I have ever met.
    However I have fallen in and out of love with their personalitys, now me and one have a mutual love for each other. It's not sexual, just huge respect for eacht other.
    So maybe guys can love best female mates without wanting to go out with each other?
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    I really dont think it is true.
 
 
 
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