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meeting new people
hey
i think this is gonna sound stupid, but i'm just feeling really bad at the moment, and i just need to talk to someone...
i have the ability to make little things into really big things in my head, so i'm sorry if this is like a tiny thing that i'm making into a huge one.
i just really wanna be like a social butterfly, and want to enjoy meeting people, but i just feel really scared and stuff...and i think it makes me sound even less sincere when i talk to them, which pushed ppl away from me even more. i'm scared that they won't like me, or i'll say something they won't like, so in my head i think maybe i shouldn't say nething at all...
i'm going into my second year of uni, and supposedly i have my uni friends and my home friends. i've just come back from holiday with my family home, for a couple days before i go back to uni for a week to find a house. i think iv'e really isolated myself with my home friends, at uni, i haven't really kept in touch. now when i fone them they seem really distant, and make plans to do stuff without me...i feel kinda nervous and stuff wen i talk to them, like thinking what do they think of me now and stuff...
what i'm asking is how can i make meeting new people easier and get back with my old friends now they've moved on and made new friends?
sorry this is really long and pathetic...i hope someone will write back!
xxxxxxxxx
i think this is gonna sound stupid, but i'm just feeling really bad at the moment, and i just need to talk to someone...
i have the ability to make little things into really big things in my head, so i'm sorry if this is like a tiny thing that i'm making into a huge one.
i just really wanna be like a social butterfly, and want to enjoy meeting people, but i just feel really scared and stuff...and i think it makes me sound even less sincere when i talk to them, which pushed ppl away from me even more. i'm scared that they won't like me, or i'll say something they won't like, so in my head i think maybe i shouldn't say nething at all...
i'm going into my second year of uni, and supposedly i have my uni friends and my home friends. i've just come back from holiday with my family home, for a couple days before i go back to uni for a week to find a house. i think iv'e really isolated myself with my home friends, at uni, i haven't really kept in touch. now when i fone them they seem really distant, and make plans to do stuff without me...i feel kinda nervous and stuff wen i talk to them, like thinking what do they think of me now and stuff...
what i'm asking is how can i make meeting new people easier and get back with my old friends now they've moved on and made new friends?
sorry this is really long and pathetic...i hope someone will write back!
xxxxxxxxx
Its not pathetic at all - in fact i would say at least half the people on this forum feel the same/have felt the same.
The most important thing about meeting new people is a common factor. Let me explain. For example someone goes to the pub and the football is on, you talk to someone watching the footy about football and bingo you talk about loads of things and become friends. The common factor can be anything, you just need something to connect you to the other person.
Im sure you will be fine, go out and try and be proactive about it. Your not going to make any friends sat at home (except on here of course)
Good luck
The most important thing about meeting new people is a common factor. Let me explain. For example someone goes to the pub and the football is on, you talk to someone watching the footy about football and bingo you talk about loads of things and become friends. The common factor can be anything, you just need something to connect you to the other person.
Im sure you will be fine, go out and try and be proactive about it. Your not going to make any friends sat at home (except on here of course)
Good luck
hey thanx for replying
yeah it does seem so easily sed, but not done...i've been telling myself to do that for ages, i've have lapses when i feel kinda confident but more times when i feel like i'm not. i like comfortable things, and hiding in my own world...
sometimes i feel like i'm gonna push the ppl i'm closest to now cos i'm like this.
xxxxx
yeah it does seem so easily sed, but not done...i've been telling myself to do that for ages, i've have lapses when i feel kinda confident but more times when i feel like i'm not. i like comfortable things, and hiding in my own world...
sometimes i feel like i'm gonna push the ppl i'm closest to now cos i'm like this.
xxxxx
I feel the same a lot of the time. I'm sorry I can't really help you but I just wanted you to know you're not alone 
xx
xxhey thanx...it's good to hear i'm not alone, but every1 i know seems so sure of themselves, and who they are...i just seem to be questioning everything about myself at the moment, and i don't know how to stop...
xxxxxx
xxxxxx
I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. Being shy or unconfident can be a really isolating and lonely experience and hard to break away from, however just because you are goin into your second year does not mean you will always feel like this. We all tend to have highs and lows in confidence levels and believe me i know what that feels like. I'm about to start at kingston in sept and its been 2 years since i have even written an essay!! I also have a twin sister who i have to leave behind and don't know how i will cope by myself! For me this feels like my first day at school.If i can give you any advice at all it would be to greet your uni friends with a big confident smile....most of the time when you act confident you start to become it!Just remember you are as good as anyone else!
i just really wanna be like a social butterfly, and want to enjoy meeting people, but i just feel really scared and stuff...and i think it makes me sound even less sincere when i talk to them, which pushed ppl away from me even more. i'm scared that they won't like me, or i'll say something they won't like, so in my head i think maybe i shouldn't say nething at all...
I can totally relate. How can you make meeting people easier? It's that time old question isn't it. I'd love to know the answer myself. Maybe there isn't an answer. Maybe its supposed to be difficult for a reason.
I know what you mean about feeling detached from people you haven't had contact with in a while, then feeling left out, then akward, its probably because you missed out on events they discuss. Small talk always seems to work.
Good luck with it anyway.
thanx guys!
i just don't know how confident ppl can do it? how do they know what to say and make it sounds really interesting and do it all the time? i've tried making myself believe that what i'm saying is interesting, u know the 'if u believe it, it'll be true' thing, but it doesn't work!
xxxxx
i just don't know how confident ppl can do it? how do they know what to say and make it sounds really interesting and do it all the time? i've tried making myself believe that what i'm saying is interesting, u know the 'if u believe it, it'll be true' thing, but it doesn't work!
xxxxx
It doesn't need to be interesting. Most people love nothing more than to talk endlessly about themselves and their boring lives.
Ask them lots of questions and they'll be eternally happy.
Ask them lots of questions and they'll be eternally happy.
really? i know it's true, but u can't talk about them forever...
but don't u have to be funny? i mean i know the whole world can't b a comedian, but i just with i was funnier...i know u can't make ureself b funny...i just don't know why anyone would choose to wanna b with me, i don't seem like i have nething to give (argh, i know that sounds sooo like it's fishing, but it's true, i am puzzled what ppl think i have to give) how i can be more like those ppl who just know how to deal with people and not just once but keep them forever??
but don't u have to be funny? i mean i know the whole world can't b a comedian, but i just with i was funnier...i know u can't make ureself b funny...i just don't know why anyone would choose to wanna b with me, i don't seem like i have nething to give (argh, i know that sounds sooo like it's fishing, but it's true, i am puzzled what ppl think i have to give) how i can be more like those ppl who just know how to deal with people and not just once but keep them forever??
No no no, you ask them questions about their lives, and let them do the talking. They love it.
Trying too hard to be funny probably doesn't work as it'd sound forced. Some people are just so damn quick witted though. I wish I was like that too. *sigh*
Trying too hard to be funny probably doesn't work as it'd sound forced. Some people are just so damn quick witted though. I wish I was like that too. *sigh*
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