relationship problem

i hope no one i know in real life reads this but:

girl x used to like me lots but i didnt really like her and so paid no attention, recently it has flipped and i have started to really like her but she claims she doesnt like me. further complications are that we have known each other for 6 years and are really good mates. its like our personalities were made from each other, and even though we have never been out it is like we have been going out for a few years, arguing like a married couple people say. i told her how i felt the other night but she didnt reciprocate, but its like i can see it in her eyes that she does, but doesnt want to admit it to herself or something. i have only one month left before university and i just have to hope that she has a change of mind.

any advice?

Reply 1

Tasha-twi

from a girls point of view: if she's liked u once she can like you again. U really certain though that you wana get with her just before uni? maybe she does want to be with u but at the same time wants to have fun and meet lots of new ppl at uni. just give her some space to think about it and don't pester otherwise ur friendship might become uncomfortable. hope this helps

Reply 2

fleur-de-lis

1

You sound awfully like someone I know... but he is away in the land of no net connections, so can't be him.

I have been in a very similar situation and if she's like me, what I write below might be applicable.
1. She must have really liked you in the beginning and you snubbed her
2. She might have been quite hurt and decided that it's best to see you as a friend since you do too.
3. You now like her because you've realised that you both complement each other and despite arguing, you still remains friends
4. You apparently told her that you like her, but she doesn't reciprocate probably because she remembers 1 &2.

What I would advice is that you tell her exactly what you wrote here, maybe add that it took you such a long time to realise how wonderful she is and how much she complements you & to give you a chance, because you'd like to know her better.

Reply 3

fleur-de-lis

1

and of course, add that despite everything, you'll always be friends.

Reply 4

Akirafuk

wow, I totally agree with fleur-de-lis, I think you should just leave it though. Find someone else at uni, probs be for the best.

Reply 5

af1

OP

i cant though, my best friend told me to try to play hard to get. its actually impossible shes like an addiction and i need to see her. its getting me pretty down.

Reply 6

fleur-de-lis

1

af1

i cant though, my best friend told me to try to play hard to get. its actually impossible shes like an addiction and i need to see her. its getting me pretty down.

Now you definitely sound like someone I know :biggrin:

Wait, your chum told you that you must play hard to get? Look, get rid of these mind games- it will cause only more pain and heartaches.
What you can now do is to talk to her, tell her what you feel now and say that you didn't appreciate her before but just like a wine becomes better with every year (no idea why I am writing this), you now appreciate her more. Moreover you are moving away and you want to have a special relationship with her.
But do this only if you are confident that you'll be true to her - when you go to Univ, you will meet so many other girls who may attract you more and if you say all this, and dump her later, it would be quite hard for her.

On more thinking, maybe you could wait till you are Univ and see if you really miss her.

Reply 7

Alias_Alyssa

1

You sound like someone I KNOW too...but's he's at the same Uni with me and he's just gone to China so it can't be him!!! Hehe

Has it occured to you SHE maybe playing hard to get? I mean, they always say...you always want what you can't have. Maybe this way, once you're together again, after the long chase she'll think you'll appreciate her more...

The wrath of the long distance relationship....can you handle it?

Reply 8

fleur-de-lis

1

Akira_Shinoda

You sound like someone I KNOW too...but's he's at the same Uni with me and he's just gone to China so it can't be him!!!

The guy I know isn't at China and is at Uni too... is this kind of behaviour rampant in guys? And I thought that I was the only one who had to face it! :p:

Reply 9

r_raghav11

1

tell her how u feel. talking abt it in the open rather keepin stuff to urself is the worst thing. if u feel u wanna change things b/w u both...initiate the convo and see how it goes.

Reply 10

CherryGarcia

1

I think you are mistaken, that you can see smth in her eyes. if she would like you, she would not miss a chance to get you, trust me. I had the same situation, there was a guy who liked me, and he told me about his feelings, but I said I didnt like him in that way, and he started to say "I can c it in ureyes. I c u like me, admit it" I mean, why would I say "no" if I'd feel that I like someone. the same here, it seems to me that you lost your chnace dude...but u know, evrth that happens has its own sence, so may be it is better, you have just 1 month to Uni left, and if you start to date with her in a "real way" it can be pretty hard for you to leave, and you will just suffer. Think about it, probably there is the right girl waiting for you in the Uni. Good Luck!

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