Love vs. In Love

It makes you go crazy first, then makes everything around you go crazy and then everyone around you thinks ur crazy. :rolleyes:

Just kiddin mate. Its a nice feeling...it can never really be defined though! But when ur in it u'll know wat it is! :wink:

Reply 2

OP

r_raghav11

It makes you go crazy first, then makes everything around you go crazy and then everyone around you thinks ur crazy. :rolleyes:

Just kiddin mate. Its a nice feeling...it can never really be defined though! But when ur in it u'll know wat it is! :wink:

haha...I think I kind of know what you're talking about. I thought I was in love for years..but now that I think about it, I'm unsure about whether it was simply love or in love.

Reply 3

another thing...they say slowly the chemistry dies out after marriage...i dont think thats true though! You can always keep it going...provided both sides make it work you know!

Reply 4

BlokeFromStoke

SlyPie

I've just been contemplating, and I was wondering exactly what the difference was between the two?

Adults say that when people marry they are "in love" but that gradually becomes "love" which is longer-lasting and not as ephemeral.

Does "in love" mean sexual desire and thus wanting to jump on that person?

Does "love" simply mean caring for that person but is not as deep as "in love"?

Doesn't marriage sound crappy when adults with experience tell you that 'in love" gradually becomes "love"..and thus it seems you lose all desire for the other person?

Can you be "in love" with someone without wanting to have sex with them?

In my opinion to love someone is to care for them, about their welfare etc. To be in love with someone there has to be a romantic spark added to this and a feeling that they are somehow part of you. Agree with the comment of having crazy feelings as well! I do believe you can be in love with somebody without the sex since love is emotional whereas sex is more physical. In my experience, sex when in love does become a much more emotional experience, particularly for the woman, sometimes ending in tears and the like. Quite unnerving at first!

As for wanting to jump on someone, that's just lust.

Love is such a hard emotion to define and that's my excuse for my crap explanation of my views! :biggrin:

Reply 5

SlyPie

haha...I think I kind of know what you're talking about. I thought I was in love for years..but now that I think about it, I'm unsure about whether it was simply love or in love.

yeah it does make u feel that way! at one point of time u feel like ur in love...and u go around town yellin out yay...i'm in love! and like in a couple of weeks...u drown ur sorrow in the same part of town with beer! Life's like that!!! and love is a CRAZY thin!!! Its fun when ur in love and then again...it hurts when ur outta it!

Reply 6

OP

BlokeFromStoke

In my opinion to love someone is to care for them, about their welfare etc. To be in love with someone there has to be a romantic spark added to this and a feeling that they are somehow part of you. Agree with the comment of having crazy feelings as well! I do believe you can be in love with somebody without the sex since love is emotional whereas sex is more physical. In my experience, sex when in love does become a much more emotional experience, particularly for the woman, sometimes ending in tears and the like. Quite unnerving at first!

As for wanting to jump on someone, that's just lust.

Love is such a hard emotion to define and that's my excuse for my crap explanation of my views! :biggrin:

I see..well what about if you have no desire to have sex with that person but wouldn't mind having sex with them , considering you do care much about them. Is that love or in love?

Man..love is confusing.

Reply 7

OP

r_raghav11

yeah it does make u feel that way! at one point of time u feel like ur in love...and u go around town yellin out yay...i'm in love! and like in a couple of weeks...u drown ur sorrow in the same part of town with beer! Life's like that!!! and love is a CRAZY thin!!! Its fun when ur in love and then again...it hurts when ur outta it!

hah...yes, well it seems near the beginning of the relationship you yell "yay im in love"..and in the latter bit, it seems much more died down.

Why can't we always feel elated like it was in the beginning??

Eek.

Reply 8

well ur bound to feel elated again! when u fall in love again! If love was permanent...pubs wud close ! :rolleyes:

anyways...its just a transition thingy u know. Feelings change...just have some fun and dont worry too much as to what is gonna come.

Reply 9

SlyPie

I see..well what about if you have no desire to have sex with that person but wouldn't mind having sex with them , considering you do care much about them. Is that love or in love?

Man..love is confusing.

just have sex! think later ! :biggrin:

Reply 10

DeLboY

SlyPie

I've just been contemplating, and I was wondering exactly what the difference was between the two?

Adults say that when people marry they are "in love" but that gradually becomes "love" which is longer-lasting and not as ephemeral.

Does "in love" mean sexual desire and thus wanting to jump on that person?

Does "love" simply mean caring for that person but is not as deep as "in love"?

Doesn't marriage sound crappy when adults with experience tell you that 'in love" gradually becomes "love"..and thus it seems you lose all desire for the other person?

Can you be "in love" with someone without wanting to have sex with them?

To say you're in love with someone does sound a lot more intimate than just love (you wouldn't say you're in love with your parents, but you do love them)

But tere really is no semantical difference! It's just another way of saying it. If you're in love with someone, you love them and vice versa. One is not 'deeper' or more caring than the other.

What you describe sounds more like the difference between love and lust.

Lust is an intense desire for something, usually based solely on instinct.

Love is much more, its something that grows with your knowledge of the person. Im not really that sure myself, until I've been there..

Reply 11

Helenia

20

SlyPie

Does "in love" mean sexual desire and thus wanting to jump on that person?

I don't think it's necessarily related to sexual desire - that's just lust, which is a different thing and not necessarily related to love (you can fancy someone sexually without liking/knowing their personality or acting on it).

Personally I'm not sure of the definition - is "in love" more to do with loving the partnership that you're in, and "love" the feelings towards the person themselves? I think they're not really mutually exclusive.

Reply 12

Mrs_F

15

r_raghav11

another thing...they say slowly the chemistry dies out after marriage...i dont think thats true though! You can always keep it going...provided both sides make it work you know!

I totally agree with you there! My grandparents for example were married for 55 years this year (unfortunately my granda passed away a few months ago), but they were still in love after all that time. You could tell, they were still so happy together and that gives hope I think, that marriages do work!

Reply 13

fleur-de-lis

In my dictionary, love is when you platonically like someone much, giving all affection and askin for nothing in return. Being in love is when you see that person at a level higher than others, with whom you can see yourselves spending eternity with. You have to love him to be in love with him. And yes, you can be in love with someone without having sex with him.
I find I Corinthians 13 to be very helpful in defining love.
Btw, Lust is the case when you are infatuated and is totally your body's reaction sans logical thinking.

Reply 14

-TMG-

9

What I don't get is this BS:

'I love him but I'm not IN love with him'

WTF!? Give your head a shake woman. The two terms 'love' and 'in love' are basically the same, and if you use them together some people think that's a good enough reason to dump someone. Or even that it's the truth. What they mean is 'I'm seeing someone else/You bore me/I'm lesbian and seeing your sister'.

I've never had this done to me btw but I just think the whole idea of 'love' and 'in love' being in anyway different is ridiculous. It's like cheese and fromage, or day and daytime.

Reply 15

Helenia

20

I love my sister, but I'm not in love with her :p:

Reply 16

OP

-TMG-

What I don't get is this BS:

'I love him but I'm not IN love with him'

WTF!? Give your head a shake woman. The two terms 'love' and 'in love' are basically the same, and if you use them together some people think that's a good enough reason to dump someone. Or even that it's the truth. What they mean is 'I'm seeing someone else/You bore me/I'm lesbian and seeing your sister'.

I've never had this done to me btw but I just think the whole idea of 'love' and 'in love' being in anyway different is ridiculous. It's like cheese and fromage, or day and daytime.

I'm not sure about that..

You can love him but not be attracted to him, or you can love him but not see yourself spending the rest of your life with him...which then probably does not equate to "in love."

Marriage is scary and it's better just to be live-in partners from my POV right now. I mean honestly, 50% of marriages end in divorce in America..why marry unless he has money?

Reply 17

saz_1989

2

I love my friends, but I'm in love with my boyfriend. I want to spend time with my friends, and actively make the effort to do so, but I'd drive 100 miles every day to see my boyfriend for a few hours. I have the best conversations with my friends, but I have even better silences with my boyfriend.

Well that's what I think anyway. Being in love means you think of the person and feel all sparkly inside. It's the bestest feeling :smile:

Reply 18

Mrs_F

15

SlyPie

Marriage is scary and it's better just to be live-in partners from my POV right now. I mean honestly, 50% of marriages end in divorce in America..why marry unless he has money?

Oh my god your are joking? Maybe it's an American thing, but surely you marry for love and not for money? I can't wait to marry my fiance and not for his money as we will both be earning as much as each other. We want to marry as we want to spend the rest of our lives together. Fair enough a lot of marriages do end in divorce but if we thought like that about everything we wouldn't do anything! A lot of relationships finish before marriage is even contemplated does that mean you won't get into a relationship in fear of it ending?

Reply 19

CherryGarcia