Bloke with 2 kids

I have met this bloke with two children. He keeps texting me and ringing me asking me to go out. I am actually going out with him tonight. It is just the fact that he is 27 with two children really puts me off. Should it? I am 22.

I mean I'd rather have a serious relationship at my age with some one free for the future and in no financial commitments to any one other than *our children* Sorry I know that I have just met this bloke :wink:

Not sure what I think to this

Reply 1

Fleece

15

Umm i dunno...do you think he'll be worth it? It's a lot to take on at your age...

Reply 2

Butterfly

1

Go! What have you got to lose? You could be missing out on the man of your dreams...

Reply 3

fleur-de-lis

1

Hi Laura, www.ivillage.co.uk has some boards which might help you with this- the last time I was browsing around, there were some similar questions, so you might find it helpful.

Reply 4

Possession

1

How much do you like him?

Reply 5

fleur-de-lis

1

LauraWalker

I have met this bloke with two children. He keeps texting me and ringing me asking me to go out. I am actually going out with him tonight. It is just the fact that he is 27 with two children really puts me off. Should it? I am 22.

I mean I'd rather have a serious relationship at my age with some one free for the future and in no financial commitments to any one other than *our children* Sorry I know that I have just met this bloke :wink:

Not sure what I think to this

Go for this date and see how it goes. You have said that you prefer a guy with no financial commitments, so perhaps that might later blight your relationship. But give this a try and see how he is.

Reply 6

Jayjayjay

1

Ditto. He comes with 'baggage' but does it really matter, if he is your ideal guy then you could be missing out. Give it a go, you will never know until you try. All the best =0)

Reply 7

classy_bird

1

I'd say go for it as it's only a date at this stage.....but I am kinda wondering how 27 + 2 kids = single. I mean I know things don't always work out but if he liked her enough to have 2 kids (assuming it's the same mother!) then the potential for her spewing when she finds out about you is huge.

At this stage though you've nothing to worry about - and you might not like him all that much after being on a date with him! Totally agree about the long term prospects...and nothing wrong with saying that either :biggrin:

Reply 8

Gem

14

I would go out with him, I mean it's only a date...not like you're gonna marry him. To me it seems you're thinking too far in advance hun. I mean you might date him a couple of times then both decide you want no more, or you might date him for a couple of years, by which time if you really like him you'll be ready to take on the commitment! I have a friend who married a guy of 36, now she's step mam to his 3 kids...and she's only 22...but they've been happily married for a year!

So anyway, my advice, have fun on the date, don't think too much about the future and just see how it goes! :hugs:

Reply 9

Adhsur

15

I wouldn't go out with someone I couldn't be serious with in future - if you do get serious, it could get complicated. I say don't go.

Reply 10

Lady Narcissus

OP

14

The two kids are twins :smile:

and apparently his partner said she was on the pill and was long term.

Any way we are really different and I don't think I am interested at all! In fact quite the opposite and the children are nothing to do with it. (just been for meal)

Reply 11

thealchemist

Are you pleased you went? After all, nothing ventured nothing gained.

Reply 12

Lauren18

14

My last boyfriend had a 2 year old daughter, which at first I didn't think would bother me, but in the end it did. When he kept cancelling on me to look after her, it got very annoying.

People who have kids will (rightly) always put them first, before anyone or anything. You have to be a super-human partner to be able to deal with this though; and unless you're madly in love with someone and couldn't bear to be without them, it's really not worth the trouble.

But, there's no harm in a few dates... but I'd strongly advise against anything serious, just because it gets too tricksy. Unless you, unlike me, can cope with always being second best.

Reply 13

Kura1984

2

A date doesn't spell out a serious relationship in the future. But you should take it very slow and see what he and his children are about. I'd go for good old fashioned dating or friendship before I leapt in at the deep end. Kids are involved here and they could end up even more hurt than you or this guy.

Not trying to put you off, you understand!

(BTW, I'm engaged to a guy who had three children previously. It most definately did get complicated, awkward, downright horrible at times. But it worked out because we worked at the situation)

Reply 14

Lady Narcissus

OP

14

I would not get involved because he is yakky and only talks about him self and appears to be a bit controlling, kids or no kids; I do not take to him at all.

Reply 15

xx_ambellina_xx

14

Oh, well, that answers your question then doesn't it?

Personally I'm a romantic :biggrin:

I'm glad you went out with him, at least, since you shouldn't judge a person by their circumstances. He might have been a really nice guy. Obviously you weren't suited though. I hope you find someone nice :smile:

Reply 16

saz_1989

2

My sister dated a guy with a kid (she was 16, he was 18 or 19). I thought it was weird, but I don't think the guy had anything to do with the kid. Personally I wouldn't want to get involved with someone with a kid, because I wouldn't be interested in the kid. I'd get pissed off if he cancelled to look after it, or if I went round and it was there. I wouldn't want anything getting in the way of my relationship. Plus I hate kids - I don't even want my own. And if a guy has kids with someone, and can't commit to them, will they commit to anyone else?? Dodgy ground...

Reply 17

Fudgie

go out with him once or twice, see if you have any feelings for him, if you do go for it, if you don't, find another guy! just follow your heart! :smile:

Reply 18

embelina

1

im 18 and i met a 22 yr old with two kids...i neva got to see him coz he lived too far away and wen eva i was free, he was looking after the kids...
think i wud have quite liked to have gone out with him tho, just coz i did like him quite a lot...dating him dusnt automatically make u a parental figure....hope u decide wot to do xx

Reply 19

Jenna999

1

do people not read all the posts before replying?!! she's already been out with him now and decided she doesnt want to pursue it any further!

Bloke with 2 kids

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