Turn on thread page Beta

What's the matter with me? watch

Announcements
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    genuine answers only please. I'm a bit worried and i dont think jokey answers would do me any good right now.

    I'm sure there is something wrong, for a long time i've had cycles of depression for large periods of time but broken up by normality. it started wen i had a panic attack about 6 years ago and comes and goes for months at a time. I thought until recently that i was probably just that kinda person but actually i now realise that this isnt normal. Also, though i thought firstly only of depression, i saw a programme on tv about bipolar disorder recently and since then i've noticed possible manic stages in my life so far. for example i can be extremely impulsive, spending a lot of money that i cant really afford to, or jumping in the car and driving miles and miles away with v v little thought and thinking oh i've got this great idea...! also i realised that patterns in past sexual behaviour, eg sleeping with my ex boyfriend for the hell of it for a few months then not talking at all for myb 6 months. In general i feel like i am my own contradiction, i can be massively over optomistic and suddenly change to very pessimistic. Also, i sometimes find myself thinking of death. to be clear i have no intention, thoughts or want to kill myself or anyone else for that matter, but death in general sometimes enters my mind without thinking. As well as that, i also have an anxiety condition called trichitillomania (compulsive hair pulling) and a more creative condtion called synesthesia (seeing colours in letters, numbers etc).

    Basically, i'm going out of my mind worrying wots wrong with me. Ive been very agitated for years over this and its got to the point where i dont know what to think and need an outside perspective. i know i should see my doctor, and i do see a counseller to whom i havent really voiced my concerns, cos i'm worried that i'll be told im over reacting and i dont think i could handle someone brushing this off.

    Anything you have to say that you think might help me would be so gratefully received, thank you if u actually read this far. xxxxxxxx
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by xXxJOxXx)
    genuine answers only please. I'm a bit worried and i dont think jokey answers would do me any good right now.

    I'm sure there is something wrong, for a long time i've had cycles of depression for large periods of time but broken up by normality. it started wen i had a panic attack about 6 years ago and comes and goes for months at a time. I thought until recently that i was probably just that kinda person but actually i now realise that this isnt normal. Also, though i thought firstly only of depression, i saw a programme on tv about bipolar disorder recently and since then i've noticed possible manic stages in my life so far. for example i can be extremely impulsive, spending a lot of money that i cant really afford to, or jumping in the car and driving miles and miles away with v v little thought and thinking oh i've got this great idea...! also i realised that patterns in past sexual behaviour, eg sleeping with my ex boyfriend for the hell of it for a few months then not talking at all for myb 6 months. In general i feel like i am my own contradiction, i can be massively over optomistic and suddenly change to very pessimistic. Also, i sometimes find myself thinking of death. to be clear i have no intention, thoughts or want to kill myself or anyone else for that matter, but death in general sometimes enters my mind without thinking. As well as that, i also have an anxiety condition called trichitillomania (compulsive hair pulling) and a more creative condtion called synesthesia (seeing colours in letters, numbers etc).

    Basically, i'm going out of my mind worrying wots wrong with me. Ive been very agitated for years over this and its got to the point where i dont know what to think and need an outside perspective. i know i should see my doctor, and i do see a counseller to whom i havent really voiced my concerns, cos i'm worried that i'll be told im over reacting and i dont think i could handle someone brushing this off.

    Anything you have to say that you think might help me would be so gratefully received, thank you if u actually read this far. xxxxxxxx
    I wont say your over-reacting, but its a predictable pattern of behaviour. Perhaps seeing a psychologist as opposed to a councellor will be more effective, as then it might be possible to start a cycle of psychological treatment

    Theres nothing wrong with you, dont forget, its not all black or white...
    From your self-analysis, I would deem it that you act in a polarised manner which would be partially due to the fact you are probably chemically more inclined to have varied reactions...

    Panic attacks, anxiety, manic behaviour... they all indicate that you are probably trapping yourself psychologically and are consequentially getting worked up...
    However, its not a problem, rather, you just need to break the pattern of behaviour to feel more content... then you will be more realxed, less self-attacking (so you wont seem/be as manic as previously) etc etc...

    Its all cool and it will pass! You just have to truly want it to... whilst you might need a doctor to recommend you to a psychologist, a doctor most likely wont do anything more than that... docotrs in the past havent treated and phsycial sympotms Ive had, instead reffering me

    good luck!
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    You really should go and see your doctor if you're experiencing depression and think you have the symptoms of bipolar or something similar. I really don't think your doctor will just brush you off - you're experiencing all these feelings and mood swings and impulses that have a serious impact on your life and it's their job to help you in anyway they can. And I definitely don't think your counsellor will act like you're over-reacting! The whole point of seeing the counsellor is so they can help you through things like this so why are you bothering to see them if you're not willing to voice your true feelings? Just take the plunge, tell them everything you've said here and I'm sure you'll get all the help you might need.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by xXxJOxXx)
    genuine answers only please. I'm a bit worried and i dont think jokey answers would do me any good right now.

    I'm sure there is something wrong, for a long time i've had cycles of depression for large periods of time but broken up by normality. it started wen i had a panic attack about 6 years ago and comes and goes for months at a time. I thought until recently that i was probably just that kinda person but actually i now realise that this isnt normal. Also, though i thought firstly only of depression, i saw a programme on tv about bipolar disorder recently and since then i've noticed possible manic stages in my life so far. for example i can be extremely impulsive, spending a lot of money that i cant really afford to, or jumping in the car and driving miles and miles away with v v little thought and thinking oh i've got this great idea...! also i realised that patterns in past sexual behaviour, eg sleeping with my ex boyfriend for the hell of it for a few months then not talking at all for myb 6 months. In general i feel like i am my own contradiction, i can be massively over optomistic and suddenly change to very pessimistic. Also, i sometimes find myself thinking of death. to be clear i have no intention, thoughts or want to kill myself or anyone else for that matter, but death in general sometimes enters my mind without thinking. As well as that, i also have an anxiety condition called trichitillomania (compulsive hair pulling) and a more creative condtion called synesthesia (seeing colours in letters, numbers etc).

    Basically, i'm going out of my mind worrying wots wrong with me. Ive been very agitated for years over this and its got to the point where i dont know what to think and need an outside perspective. i know i should see my doctor, and i do see a counseller to whom i havent really voiced my concerns, cos i'm worried that i'll be told im over reacting and i dont think i could handle someone brushing this off.

    Anything you have to say that you think might help me would be so gratefully received, thank you if u actually read this far. xxxxxxxx

    First of all, you need to go to your GP. Sounds like the obvious one, and I know you know you need to do this, so I'm just enforcing the point a little ! It all sounds very similar to my own experience, although I've had less manic stages. I was so worried for so long.. like, years. And I always knew there must be something up, but didn't feel comfortable talking about it, admitting it to myself. And I felt like I would be a burden on whoever I spoke to. I also worried that I was overreacting, and was terrified at the thought of seeing my GP.

    BUT, i finally took the plunge following a panic attack mid-lecture on Wednesday (that was pretty embarassing) and saw my doctor this morning. As soon as I sat down I just burst into tears, but my doctor was lovely. He's put me on medication for four weeks, and when I go back to see him he said we'll discuss how it's been going. He also offered me counselling which I will probably do alongside my medication.

    I haven't even started my meds yet but I already feel so much better having taken that initial positive step towards getting better. It's such a personal thing, and if it's affecting you as much as you say, then you're not overreacting, you're just.. reacting !

    Over the next week or so, keep a mood diary. Just note down how you're feeling at certain times of the day. See if you notice a trigger or a trend. Bring that along to your appointment and it will help your doctor understand. It also helps if you don't feel comfortable talking about it - as soon as i sat in front of my doc this morning I pretty much just couldn't get any words out, so you can just hand them what you have written and then they'll ask you questions, prompted by what they've read.

    I hope it works out ! Good luck x
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    There is nothing wrong with you.
    Except that you've convinced yourself that there is.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    thank you, i feel a bit better already, i'll speak tto my counseller monday and take it from there.

    Thanks again x
 
 
 
Poll
Brexit: Given the chance now, would you vote leave or remain?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.