I want to be myself...but I am afraid people will not like me Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 8 years ago
#1
I am just sick and tired of this persona that I have created.

I am only comfortable with two of my friends so they know how I am really like.
At work, I act quite shy and funny, but I am really not like that at all and it pisses me off but I am really quite feisty and I do not normally take **** from anyone.
For example at work they make fun of my hair and my weight (I am not actually fat) it really pisses me off but I just laugh it off so they do think I am crazy/angry. but normally I would be all like look at yourself or tell em to shut up or cuss them like there is no tomorrow. The thing is I am scared if i become all feisty they will just not like me at all, and then it would be much harder to work with them.

So what should I do? Should I just become myself? I am sick of being the one they mock. Its like its written all over my face.
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morecambebay
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#2
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#2
Mock them back?
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Anonymous #1
#3
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#3
^^
I would normally.
My mate at work asked them (the tossers that make fun of me) why they always pick on me, all they said was that she should count herself lucky that its not her and to not complain.
****** *******s.
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riotgrrl
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#4
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If you try to make everyone like you, you will be THE most boring person in the world. If everyone liked you, it would mean you had no controversial opinions, nothing remotely unique or unusual about you- you'd be absolutely nothing special. So why bother? You might as well be 100% yourself all the time and if they don't like you for it, so what? At least then you'll know that the people who DO like you genuinely like you for who you are. People pleasing will get you nowhere.
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pina.Love
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#5
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(Original post by riotgrrl)
If you try to make everyone like you, you will be THE most boring person in the world. If everyone liked you, it would mean you had no controversial opinions, nothing remotely unique or unusual about you- you'd be absolutely nothing special. So why bother? You might as well be 100% yourself all the time and if they don't like you for it, so what? At least then you'll know that the people who DO like you genuinely like you for who you are. People pleasing will get you nowhere.
That is actually true...
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Chocothunder
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#6
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#6
If you are shy, inoffensive and bland then you won't offend anyone, so will have hundreds of friends.
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*Rouge*
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#7
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#7
There's always people that will appreciate you for who you really are and then they'l be those who don't..thats just life so just be yourself because not everybody's going to like you.
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Tariq786
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#8
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Its better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you're not.
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Anonymous #1
#9
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(Original post by Tariq786)
Its better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you're not.
so true.
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ColonelMoore
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#10
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#10
I think sometimes it comes down to how good you are at being mocking and condescending. Personally, I'm damn good at both and I take pride in that.

So if someone gives me ****, they get it back, and fast. Worse than they gave me, and they learn pretty quickly not to bother ******* with me. And after that I get on fine with them.

All of my closest friends are people who are exactly the same as me, and we all take great pleasure in watching each other verbally destroy those kinds of people. And there are bound to be people who will respect you and like you for mocking those retards, and there will be those who will hate you. I quite like being hated by some people (obviously I wouldnt like to be hated by everyone, but as long as I have a core of friends, I couldn't care less what everyone else thinks).

If someone loves or hates you, they see you as an equal. People only hate you because they can't beat you.

So you need to decide which camp you fall into - do you want to avoid confrontation and keep yourself to yourself, but remain a target for these people? Or are you going to tell them to shut the **** up, and deal with any consequences?
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presh5
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#11
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I was quite quiet to begin with in my bio class and then i came out all feisty and we all get along really well and always take the piss out of each other! tbh i had a lot of fun being myself i say go for it! they'll probably respect u more for it! good luck!
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~Kat~
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#12
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#12
You'll probably find that as soon as you give someone shit back, they'll stop. It's rather pathetic, just like junior school when you pushed the bully back and the next day they're your best friends :shifty: little people never grow up.
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aeterno
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#13
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#13
If you stand up for yourself people will be more likely to respect you.

Just be yourself and accept the fact that some people will like you and others won't.
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MancBoy
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#14
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#14
(Original post by Tariq786)
Its better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you're not.
Win!
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Wild_Precious_Life
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#15
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Where has creating this fake persona got you? Nowhere. You feel like you are suppressing your true side and that is going to make you feel bitter and frustrated. I say you should start letting your real side come through more often. If you want to say something, say it. If you want to be something, change yourself. Only you can control how you behave. You will find yourself on such a high if you go out there showing the world who you really are. Funny thing is no one likes a people pleaser. People might even realise you are behaving in a certain way to please them and they won't respect you for it trust me. It sounds like you need more confidence around new people and for that I'd suggest keep meeting new people until you improve your ability to show your real side rather than be fake.

As for these bullies at work, who cares if they don't like you? Show them your feisty side girl! Don't let them walk all over you, they sound horrible anyway so you have nothing to lose by showing them that you won't stand for their ****.
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Anonymous #1
#16
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(Original post by Wild_Precious_Life)
Where has creating this fake persona got you? Nowhere. You feel like you are suppressing your true side and that is going to make you feel bitter and frustrated. I say you should start letting your real side come through more often. If you want to say something, say it. If you want to be something, change yourself. Only you can control how you behave. You will find yourself on such a high if you go out there showing the world who you really are. Funny thing is no one likes a people pleaser. People might even realise you are behaving in a certain way to please them and they won't respect you for it trust me. It sounds like you need more confidence around new people and for that I'd suggest keep meeting new people until you improve your ability to show your real side rather than be fake.

As for these bullies at work, who cares if they don't like you? Show them your feisty side girl! Don't let them walk all over you, they sound horrible anyway so you have nothing to lose by showing them that you won't stand for their ****.
~cool
Thanks you kinda made me feel better.
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Double Agent
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#17
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#17
1. The two people who are closest to you, your best friends like the 'real' you, doesnt that tell you something?

2. Dont make the assumption that everyone loves the facade you put on.

3. People let you in when you let them in.
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Wild_Precious_Life
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#18
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(Original post by Anonymous)
~cool
Thanks you kinda made me feel better.
Aww I say this because I know how it feels to suppress your personality. I used to try and keep everyone happy by whittling away my own personality but it never worked out and I'd end up feeling angry that I wasn't being true to myself. Now I always try to talk to everyone as if I would my family/best friend. It is not always easy but it is the route which will bring you the most inner peace and you will actually realise MORE people will like you for it and think you're the cool girl they want to emulate! Don't worry that you have created this shy fake persona. It's not too late to show people who you really are. Why should they think you to be some shy, bumbling idiot when you're actually feister and wittier deep down than they could ever be?! Show the world who you really are
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Wild_Precious_Life
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#19
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#19
(Original post by Double Agent)
1. The two people who are closest to you, your best friends like the 'real' you, doesnt that tell you something?

2. Dont make the assumption that everyone loves the facade you put on.

3. People let you in when you let them in.
This is great advice....open up to the world and in turn it will open up to you! Or something to that effect :p:
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Anonymous #1
#20
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#20
(Original post by Wild_Precious_Life)
Aww I say this because I know how it feels to suppress your personality. I used to try and keep everyone happy by whittling away my own personality but it never worked out and I'd end up feeling angry that I wasn't being true to myself. Now I always try to talk to everyone as if I would my family/best friend. It is not always easy but it is the route which will bring you the most inner peace and you will actually realise MORE people will like you for it and think you're the cool girl they want to emulate! Don't worry that you have created this shy fake persona. It's not too late to show people who you really are. Why should they think you to be some shy, bumbling idiot when you're actually feister and wittier deep down than they could ever be?! Show the world who you really are
Thanks
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