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    my teacher is useless :P so if anyone has any experience in marking or whatever, please mark this! it's out of 27 and i did it in 35 minutes, so here goes, thanks!

    ''Of mice and men has been described as nearly perfect, show your response to the book as a whole and how Stenibeck makes your respond to events''

    There are many reasons as to why one may think that the novel is 'nearly perfect'. steinbeck cleverly portrays real-life issues that still face us today, in very graphic and honest ways, the novel makes the reader respond not only to the characters but to the chaning tones and atmopsheres in the novel.

    the beginning of the novel creates a sense of foreboding among the audience. after george and lennie arrive at the brush, "the flame of the sunset lifted from the mountaintops". this quote suggests that the light is leaving from where george and lennie are. the strong noun "flame" connotes that the light is very strong. light can provide the right way, the path that leads out of darkness and misery. the connotations of light are positive and innocence. the fact that this strong light is leaving, portrays that perhaps george and lennies' future of a better life (the american dream) may not be realistic. furthermore, ''mountaintops'' are the highest point in any specific landscape/area. if the light is leaving the maximum point, this could suggest that there is no hope for the pair, because after a mountaintop, the slope begins to go steepily downwards until the mountain comes to an end. thisjourney of a mountain symbolises george and lennie's relationhsip, that it will very soon come to an abrupt end. the above quote sparks fear and worry within the readers mind and prepares them for the characters' bleak futures - it encourages them to keep reading to find out what actually happens to theur relaitonship. this engaging feature is a reason why the novel is seen to be brilliant.

    Steinbeck also creates a sense of great symptahty among the readers. when george is having a deep conversation with slim, he ''carefully built his line of solitaire cards''. even thought george is sitting with somone, they are both playing what is known to be, a one-player card game. this could suggest their deep lonliness. despite the fact that the two are in company of each other, playing specifically solitaire could show that they do not see each other asn real company or real friends. george may be physically speaking to slim and vice versa, but neither are emotionally satisified, which makes the reader feel greatly sorry for them and their lonliness. the context of the novel suggests that it was extremely hard for migrant workers to maintain freinds or relationships since they were always travelling across the country in search of jobs in order to survive.

    this brings me to my next point. of how steinbeck clearly portrays the conext of the novel throughout the piece. this makes the book fantastic because ot gives a real social and historical feel. for instance, the issue of racism is very brutally but honestly shown in section 4 our the book where the audience get to know the character of crooks furhter. as soon as he begins to come out of his 'shell' so to say, and starts to feel equal to both lennie and candy (this may be because they all share disabilities in one way or another)n he experiences a major setback, which makes it clear to the audience the social status of Black people during the 1930s. Curley's wife says to crooks, ''i could get you strung up on a tree so easy it aint even funny.'' Curley's wife speaks witha tone of superiority. this comes across in the lack of punctuation in the sentence, which makes it flow very smoothly when performed. the full stop provides a sharp ending to the sentence, as it comes to a sharp stop. this makes it seem as if curley;'s wife is speaking with great authority. this shows just how low a status Black people had in the 30s. women had very few roles, were seens as mens' posessions and were often sexually disrciminated against but for curelys wife to have more authority over a man shows the great difference in social respect in the era the novel was written in. it is shocking that in those days, society would believe the word of a woman rather than a man siimply because of his race. this could create anger among the audience which conrtibutes to the quality of the book, because able to raise such strong emiotions.
    in addition to this, the quote appeals to our sense of imagery. the reader imagines somebody being lynched and it is extremely graphic and disturbing. the reader may get shocked at how easily such a horrific event could take place. the speed at which it happens is portrayed in what c's wife says - as stated above, the lack of punctuatuon makes the sentence flow quickly until it comes to an abrupt end. full stops signify the end of a sentence but here it could symbolise the end of crooks life and how easily and quikly this can be done.

    to conclude, i think that the novel IS nearly perfect because of the manner in which the author raises emotions in the readers mind. there are factors to appeal to all senses and the rollercoaster of emotions keeps the audience gripped. -- i didn;t know what else to say in the conclusion, as well as running out of time?

    ________

    okay all finished sorry about the lack of capitals and typos!
    any help is much appreciated
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    I personally haven't read 'Of Mice and Men' but is there any instances where you feel the book isn't 'nearly perfect'?

    Maybe try and give a few examples to illustrate the other point of view. Then summaries/conclude by saying what you feel overall about the book.

    How long do you get to answer each question?
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    (Original post by LTC1409)
    I personally haven't read 'Of Mice and Men' but is there any instances where you feel the book isn't 'nearly perfect'?

    Maybe try and give a few examples to illustrate the other point of view. Then summaries/conclude by saying what you feel overall about the book.

    How long do you get to answer each question?
    oh okay, that makes sense! so give like both sides of the argument?
    45 minutes to answer the of mice and men question, but 10 minutes for planning, so i did the above in 35..
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    this isnt a question this is an answer:mad:
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    (Original post by scotttb)
    this isnt a question this is an answer:mad:
    LOL! exam question ANSWER* then!
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    I dont like any of your points, they dont make an real sens. And, you englih is very poor. Make better points. DO NO USE FIRST PERSON! why do you say, "To conclude, i think that the novel IS nearly perfect". Why the "I"? The conclusion is too short, develope it. "this brings me to my next point.", DO NO SAY ME. i would give this 15, very poor. sounds like a 14 year old has wrote it. make better points, dotn just think on the surface. what is steinbeck tryign to convey? remember steinbeck is wrote the book in the 30's, therefore you can no say: "steinbeck cleverly portrays real-life issues that still face us today", as he didn't predict the furture. what faces us today?
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    i thought it was quite good, the use of quotes was excellent. the beginning description of quotes was excellent. the later descriptions less so. i think you spent a little too much time talking about how the book also reflects to the modern era. but maybe thats just me. i think as someone said you should mention some flaws aswell, the way you described it makes it seem perfect, not nearly perfect. you also missed out some major aspects of the book. I think ending the conclusion with the quote from the end of lennies life is a bit cliche but could work quite well. but definitely have that part of the book in there somewhere as well as linking it to the end of their dream.
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    (Original post by LOLismyfaveword:))
    oh okay, that makes sense! so give like both sides of the argument?
    45 minutes to answer the of mice and men question, but 10 minutes for planning, so i did the above in 35..
    Yes, I would definitely say try and give both points of view. This will show you can be analytical and will probably help you structure your conclusion. For example, you can say something along the lines of 'Some people argue that 'Of Mice and Men' isn't nearly perfect because... However, I feel differently because....'

    I would say try not to overuse 'I' and 'We', but as the question specifically asks for your personal opinion you probably could use something like 'this has left me to conclude' for the conclusion.

    Also, try and make the paragraphs flow a bit better. In theory the last sentence of the one before should link with the first sentence of the next one rather than them standing completely on their own.

    As I haven't read the actual book I'm afraid I can't be more specific about your arguments, but hopefully those general points should help. Try and remember PEE (Point, evidence, explanation.)

    Also, I would say you can probably get away with not using the whole 10 minutes for the plan. When you're in the actual exam your brain will be in overdrive so you'll probably write a lot faster. Personally I generally don't create a rigid plan for my essays, rather than just jot down a few key points I want to mention. But stick with what works best for you.
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    (Original post by sharp910sh)
    I dont like any of your points, they dont make an real sens. And, you englih is very poor. Make better points. DO NO USE FIRST PERSON! why do you say, "To conclude, i think that the novel IS nearly perfect". Why the "I"? The conclusion is too short, develope it. "this brings me to my next point.", DO NO SAY ME. i would give this 15, very poor. sounds like a 14 year old has wrote it. make better points, dotn just think on the surface. what is steinbeck tryign to convey? remember steinbeck is wrote the book in the 30's, therefore you can no say: "steinbeck cleverly portrays real-life issues that still face us today", as he didn't predict the furture. what faces us today?
    lololol. nice trolling. I hope.
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    (Original post by sharp910sh)
    I dont like any of your points, they dont make an real sens. And, you englih is very poor. Make better points. DO NO USE FIRST PERSON! why do you say, "To conclude, i think that the novel IS nearly perfect". Why the "I"? The conclusion is too short, develope it. "this brings me to my next point.", DO NO SAY ME. i would give this 15, very poor. sounds like a 14 year old has wrote it. make better points, dotn just think on the surface. what is steinbeck tryign to convey? remember steinbeck is wrote the book in the 30's, therefore you can no say: "steinbeck cleverly portrays real-life issues that still face us today", as he didn't predict the furture. what faces us today?
    and your english is fantastic?
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    (Original post by Billy Bryant)
    i thought it was quite good, the use of quotes was excellent. the beginning description of quotes was excellent. the later descriptions less so. i think you spent a little too much time talking about how the book also reflects to the modern era. but maybe thats just me. i think as someone said you should mention some flaws aswell, the way you described it makes it seem perfect, not nearly perfect. you also missed out some major aspects of the book. I think ending the conclusion with the quote from the end of lennies life is a bit cliche but could work quite well. but definitely have that part of the book in there somewhere as well as linking it to the end of their dream.
    thanks! what other events do you think i could include? i was planning on putting in the killing of candy's dog which makes the audience sympathise with the character, but thought it was pretty similar to the whole solitaire/lonliness thing lol..
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    (Original post by LOLismyfaveword:))
    my teacher is useless :P so if anyone has any experience in marking or whatever, please mark this! it's out of 27 and i did it in 35 minutes, so here goes, thanks!

    ''Of mice and men has been described as nearly perfect, show your response to the book as a whole and how Stenibeck makes your respond to events''

    There are many reasons as to why one may think that the novel is 'nearly perfect'. steinbeck cleverlyintrigues the reader by... real-life issues that still face us today,no! stick to the question, talk about the era in the america then, not now. in very graphic and honest ways, the novel makes the reader respond not only to the characters but to the chaning tones and atmopsheres in the novel.

    the beginning of the novel creates a sense of foreboding among the audience. after george and lennie arrive at the brush, "the flame of the sunset lifted from the mountaintops". try a shorter quotation for close text analysisthis quote suggests that the light is leaving from where george and lennie are. the strong noun "flame" connotes goodthat the light is very strong. light can provide the right way, the path that leads out of darkness and misery. the connotations of light are positive and innocence. the fact that this strong light is leaving, portrays that perhaps george and lennies' future of a better life (the american dream) may not be realistic.link back to the question, how does it make it perfect, e.g. link back to a theme?

    furthermore, ''mountaintops'' are the highest point in any specific landscape/area. if the light is leaving the maximum point, this could suggest that there is no hope for the pair, because after a mountaintop, the slope begins to go steepily downwards until the mountain comes to an end. thisjourney of a mountain symbolises george and lennie's relationhsip, that it will very soon come to an abrupt end. the above quote sparks fear and worry within the readers mind and prepares them for the characters' bleak futures - it encourages them to keep reading to find out what actually happens to theur relaitonship. this engaging feature is a reason why the novel is seen to be brilliant.
    Great, you linked it back to the question.


    Steinbeck also creates a sense of great symptahty among the readers. when george is having a deep conversation with slim, he ''carefully built his line of solitaire cards''. even thought george is sitting with somone, they are both playing what is known to be, a one-player card game. this could suggest their deep lonliness. despite the fact that the two are in company of each other, playing specifically solitaire could show that they do not see each other asn real company or real friends. george may be physically speaking to slim and vice versa, but neither are emotionally satisified, which makes the reader feel greatly sorry for them and their lonliness. the context of the novel suggests that it was extremely hard for migrant workers to maintain freinds or relationships since they were always travelling across the country in search of jobs in order to survive. GREAT! Try to evaluate this now..e.g. sucessfully does it... etc. Also, just for a thought, may candy's dog be a political image shunned to show rare friendship within america?

    this brings me to my next point.
    waffle.

    Steinbeck clearly portrays the context of the novel throughout the piece. this makes the book fantastic because ot gives a real social and historical feel. for instance, the issue of racism is very brutally but honestly shown in section 4 our the book where the audience get to know the character of crooks furhter. as soon as he begins to come out of his 'shell' no need for the ' ' so to say, and starts to feel equal to both lennie and candy (this may be because they all share disabilities in one way or another)n he experiences a major setback, which makes it clear to the audience the social status of Black people during the 1930s. GREAT, a great word to use would be that crooks is disenfranchised, and you can conceptualise that even further to say that he is a symbol for a world which is rarely fair and which invokes injustice upon those that are handicapped in society. Then link it back to the question and say that it is powerfully come across and is perfect


    Curley's wife says to crooks, ''i could get you strung up on a tree so easy it aint even funny.'' Curley's wife speaks witha tone of superiority. this comes across in the lack of punctuation in the sentence, which makes it flow very smoothly when performed. the full stop provides a sharp ending to the sentence, as it comes to a sharp stop. good that you've talked about the punctuation but dont really go into depth about it, talk about racism and the innuendo of this.. 'tree' ..nature possibly? See, this is an alternative interpretation which may be stupid, but you get the marks! You can conceptualise this further.this makes it seem as if curley;'s wife is speaking with great authority. this shows just how low a status Black people had in the 30s. women had very few roles, were seens as mens' posessions and were often sexually disrciminated against but for curelys wife to have more authority over a man shows the great difference in social respect in the era the novel was written in.GREAT EXPLORATION, BUT LINK BACK TO THE QUESTION.. IS THIS 'PERFECT'?.. Also, to conceptualise this idea you can say that both crooks and curleys wife are in the lower end of the hierarchy status, yet the concept steinbeck presents successfully is that in order to survive, one must chew n other and to get them weak, even weaker by preying on them


    it is shocking that in those days, society would believe the word of a woman rather than a man siimply because of his race. this could create anger among the audience which conrtibutes to the quality of the book, because able to raise such strong emiotions.


    in addition to this, the quote appeals to our sense of imagery. good the reader imagines somebody being lynched and it is extremely graphic and disturbing. the reader may get shocked at how easily such a horrific event could take place. the speed at which it happens is portrayed in what c's wife says - as stated above, the lack of punctuatuon makes the sentence flow quickly until it comes to an abrupt end.again, with the punctuation, dont talk much about this.. full stops signify the end of a sentence but here it could symbolise the end of crooks life and how easily and quikly this can be done.

    to conclude, i think that the novel IS nearly perfect because of the manner in which the author raises emotions in the readers mind. there are factors to appeal to all senses and the rollercoaster of emotions keeps the audience gripped. -- i didn;t know what else to say in the conclusion, as well as running out of time?


    ________

    okay all finished sorry about the lack of capitals and typos!
    any help is much appreciated


    See comments above..
    Also... you didnt talk about the negative things, try not to flatter the book! LOL. But take in mind what I said, as they are good ideas
    Good attempt..

    Now for marks:

    16-18 marks • structured response to task
    • sustained response to characters/situations/ideas
    • effective use of details to support answer
    • appropriate comment on meanings
    • explanation of how effects of devices/language are achieved
    You've done all of that..

    19-21 marks • sustained and developed response to task
    considered/qualified response to writer’s ideas/purposes You've done that.
    • details linked to writer’s intentions and purposes You've done that.
    • thoughtful consideration of meanings - possibly??
    • appreciation of writer’s uses of language/structure - /form
    You havent talked much about the structure, like you could have explored the use of the cylical passage in Crook's section
    'liniment'..explore the fact that racism is endemic and rife.


    I would give that.. possibly 19-20/27...
    Make the changes I've given you and you're into an A.

    Solid B for you.


    G'luck.
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    (Original post by LOLismyfaveword:))
    and your english is fantastic?
    Thats not my point. I got an A in english. It is very poor, make better points, sounds like a kid wrote that essay.

    One thing though, do not use first person. never ever, no matter what.
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    I'm guessing the OP is beyond help now, though the essay was interesting. This is for anyone who still needs help on Of Mice and Men.
    Posted 2013 and regularly updated...

    First get a good revision guide you can buy these from amazon or waterstones or wherever
    Read the introduction to the text you're studying in class! This is my top tip!
    More general help on Of Mice and Men including Curley's wife, importance of hopes and dreams and social and historical context - rollover the icons to find topics, including possible exam questions.
    Good luck! (I'm an English teacher)
 
 
 
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