The Student Room Group

Dilemma

Last night I was at a party and I made out with a girl. She was quite drunk and at the end of the evening she gave me her number and told me to text her the next day.

She is an old friend and I will probably be seeing her at some point in the future, therefore, I don't want to text her and to make a complete fool out of myself because everything that happened last night was through alcohol.

Also, she doesn't have my number at the moment so there is no way of her texting me first, therefore, if I don't text, she will feel as if I have just forgotten about her.

Do I text saying that I enjoyed last night or do I just leave it?

Cheers, James
Reply 1
It depends on how much you like her and in what context? Like do you want a relationship with her or just mates? If you want to date her just go for it, cos she might be desperately waiting by her phone for you to text, having no way of getting in touch!

You could just text her and ask her for a coffee? Then see how it goes from there?
Reply 2
Dude, always give your number, that way you have none of these problems! But since you are in this situation, wait long enough to make it look like you just remembered to text her in your hectic life. Most of all be casual, "The other night was awesome, do you want to run away with me and get married" I would stay clear of.
Reply 3
I think I do want a relationship, but the problem is that I haven't spoken to her for ages and then we suddenly met up again last night. Therefore, if I text her and she isn't up for it, the next time I see her, I'll feel like a prat.
Reply 4
Froop
Last night I was at a party and I made out with a girl. She was quite drunk and at the end of the evening she gave me her number and told me to text her the next day.

She is an old friend and I will probably be seeing her at some point in the future, therefore, I don't want to text her and to make a complete fool out of myself because everything that happened last night was through alcohol.

Also, she doesn't have my number at the moment so there is no way of her texting me first, therefore, if I don't text, she will feel as if I have just forgotten about her.

Do I text saying that I enjoyed last night or do I just leave it?

Cheers, James


I think that you do have to contact her because if you don't then she may get the impression that you regret it or are embarassed. At least that is what I would think if something like this happened between me and a male friend.

Maybe send her text asking how she is and, as gemchicken says, suggest meeting up for a coffee or other non-alcohol related event! Doing this at least indicates that you are ok with what happened and if she is keen for things to go further then she will want to meet up. And if not then you can maintain that you were doing because you wanted to meet up with her just as a friend and to make sure that what happened between the pair of you wasn't going to affect the friendship.
Reply 5
Well the thing is that having not seen her for almost 3 years now, the only reason that I would text her is about a relationship. Therefore, it isn't really possible to pull the 'just as friends' trick. Help!
Reply 6
"Good seeing you last night - hadn't seen you in ages. Enjoy the party?"

Or something along those lines. Keep it short and pleasant and see what she says.
Reply 7
Froop
Well the thing is that having not seen her for almost 3 years now, the only reason that I would text her is about a relationship. Therefore, it isn't really possible to pull the 'just as friends' trick. Help!


Okay, but how can you be sure that you want a relationship with her considering that you haven't been in contact with her in 3 years? You had a good time and you want to meet with her again. It can be as simple as that. Maybe if things work out you will be in a relationship, but at the moment all you have to do is contact her so that she knows you are cool with what happened and that you want to remain in contact now that you have met again.

I think what I am trying to say is that you know what you are thinking and what your intentions are, but that is distinct from how she may interpret a text message you send to her. Do something along the lines of what catski says in order to 'test the waters' and on the basis of the response she gives you can decide what you should do next.