He wants to kill himself. Watch

This discussion is closed.
Profesh
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#41
Report 13 years ago
#41
(Original post by Nabqueen)
I don't know what to do.
There's this guy that told me that he liked me months ago, and I said i was flattered but didn't see him the same way, but he still goes on about it loads. And recently he's saying he wants to commit suicide or go out and get shot because I rejected him. Today he told me he wants to get shot so that he doesn't have to bother me anymore. I'm really worried and feel guilty but I don't know what I can do.
He keeps asking me why I don't like him and what's wrong with him. I know that he must have low self esteem and maybe I haven't helped but I can't go out with him just for his sake to make him feel better.
I am that person; and believe me: there is absolutely nothing you can do, except to ignore him for his own sake.

Would that she were so considerate. :rolleyes:
0
Scipio
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#42
Report 13 years ago
#42
Hes a physcopath. Stay away.
0
JonnyB
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#43
Report 13 years ago
#43
How old is he? 13?
4
Profesh
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#44
Report 13 years ago
#44
(Original post by Pav27)
Hes a physcopath. Stay away.
It's psychopath.

Where in doubt, try pronouncing it. :rolleyes:
0
gwiddecombe
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#45
Report 13 years ago
#45
I was rejected by a girl I really liked last night whom i had known for ages who preferred to just remain friends for now. I respect that and also the fact that she told me that when I asked her out. Other guys should learn to do the same and stop trying to place guilt trips on others. He should want you to go out with you because you like him not because you feel you have to go out with him.
4
Trousers
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#46
Report 13 years ago
#46
This guy is obviously finding it very difficult to cope with the fact that you don't fancy him - he probably feels worthless and unattractive because of it. Haven't we all been rejected and felt like this at some point? Have some sympathy, for Christ's sake!

Admittedly, he's doing the wrong thing by making you feel guilty, but that doesn't mean he's evil or a psychopath - it just means that he's incredibly insecure and deals with rejection in a different way from the rest of us. Perhaps he thinks that you secretly feel the same way and just need a bit of encouragement.

The important thing is to make sure that he understands how you feel. Don't lead him on. Don't tell him that your parents won't let you see anyone, or you've got too much work on - that will only give him false hope.

If this is a cry for help, then help is exactly what he needs. Have a word with his parents if you know them well, or a mutual friend, or ask him whether he's thought of having counselling. Don't ignore him or get angry - this will only make him worse. If he's really your friend, you should care enough about him to make sure he's okay.
4
twistedrose
Badges: 10
Rep:
?
#47
Report 13 years ago
#47
I have been in the exact same situation as yourself.. this guy liked me and said he would commit suicide cause i rejected him. He was bordering obsessive and still is when he sees me. Trying to put me down by calling me "podgy" when clearly a size 6 is hardly fat.. i am underweight. Then going "Theres nothing wrong with you"

He is not worth the trouble.. he is attention seeking. Being rejected is very difficult, and this guy in my situation has always in his eyes been a reject. But he brings it on himself. He hit this guy i was talking to, his friend. Just cause he thought he was hitting on me. I told him i just want to be friends but he still is blinded and thinks i "keep staring at his crotch"...

Seriously send him a letter telling him why you are angered and he was bang out of order, i did and things have been better purely cause i make the exception of avoiding him... he knows the score.
0
Profesh
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#48
Report 13 years ago
#48
(Original post by Trousers)
This guy is obviously finding it very difficult to cope with the fact that you don't fancy him - he probably feels worthless and unattractive because of it. Haven't we all been rejected and felt like this at some point? Have some sympathy, for Christ's sake!

Admittedly, he's doing the wrong thing by making you feel guilty, but that doesn't mean he's evil or a psychopath - it just means that he's incredibly insecure and deals with rejection in a different way from the rest of us. Perhaps he thinks that you secretly feel the same way and just need a bit of encouragement.

The important thing is to make sure that he understands how you feel. Don't lead him on. Don't tell him that your parents won't let you see anyone, or you've got too much work on - that will only give him false hope.

If this is a cry for help, then help is exactly what he needs. Have a word with his parents if you know them well, or a mutual friend, or ask him whether he's thought of having counselling. Don't ignore him or get angry - this will only make him worse. If he's really your friend, you should care enough about him to make sure he's okay.
In my experience, the only way to 'get over' someone with whom you are that infatuated is to forget them; and the only means by which to accomplish this is either for them to ignore you, or you to ignore them. If you are genuinely his friend, then you love him enough to leave him be.
0
kiaora
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#49
Report 13 years ago
#49
(Original post by Nabqueen)
I'm really worried and feel guilty but I don't know what I can do.
this is emotional blackmail, and you musn't give in. people who go on and on about comitting suicide are often attention seeking. when people are very determined to kill themselves, they go ahead and do it. noone can say for sure what he will do, but you do need to tell someone else, maybe a parent or teacher. it's too much to handle by yourself.
4
saz_1989
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#50
Report 13 years ago
#50
It's not your job to be his psychiatrist. He's just trying to get your attention. Tell him you don't like him in that way and that he can either be your friend or nothing at all.
4
Nabqueen
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#51
Report Thread starter 13 years ago
#51
God everyone's got different approaches, i'm not gonna totally ignore him or anything because I like talking to him and if i didn't i'd worry whether he was ok. The last thing he said to me on saturday was that he wasnt gonna be alive the next day and i'd never see him again, and i thought yeh yeh but then i didnt hear from him all yesterday until like 2 in the mornin and i was worried sick, i know its stupid but i cant help it, he deffinately knows i don't like him the same way he just keeps questioning why and maybe asking himself a lot which lowers his confidence, i think he did previously see a councellor before but he got angry talking about his life or something, i duno, he's a complicated lad.
0
marabara
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#52
Report 13 years ago
#52
why put yourself through this? so what if he's nice to talk to - the end result is that you have to put up with his mental abuse

can't you perhaps just tell him or write him an email saying what he's putting you through, and that you're not going to stand for it any longer - if he wants to talk about killing himself all the time, then just say you can't cope and don't want to know him anymore
0
Profesh
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#53
Report 13 years ago
#53
(Original post by Nabqueen)
God everyone's got different approaches, i'm not gonna totally ignore him or anything because I like talking to him and if i didn't i'd worry whether he was ok. The last thing he said to me on saturday was that he wasnt gonna be alive the next day and i'd never see him again, and i thought yeh yeh but then i didnt hear from him all yesterday until like 2 in the mornin and i was worried sick, i know its stupid but i cant help it, he deffinately knows i don't like him the same way he just keeps questioning why and maybe asking himself a lot which lowers his confidence, i think he did previously see a councellor before but he got angry talking about his life or something, i duno, he's a complicated lad.
It seems palpably clear to me that this embodies the textbook definition of an 'all or nothing' sort of guy: he cannot remain content with the status quo, and will quite likely persist in manipulating you through emotional blackmail borne of an inveterate and soul-destroying infatuation. However, the notion of suicide must be discussed: if it is merely a cry for attention, which should become apparent 'yea' or 'nay' through consultation with a third-party [counsellor], then your subsequently ignoring him will either cause him to admit defeat and reconcile with the prospect of mere friendship; or, presuming his infatuation to be nonetheless genuine for the 'suicide' ploy, assist him in purging you from memory and, ultimately, moving on with his life.

Naturally, this is a viable course of action only where he can be made unambiguously aware of your position: you do not, and nor will you ever, reciprocate those sentiments; and if this entails a categorical statement to the effect that you find him physically unattractive, then so be it. Certainly, you cannot afford to allow him the benefit of the doubt any longer; that is, short of conceding that you are no less selfish than he is: if you genuinely care for his welfare, and the threat of suicide is but a harmless ruse, then you will find it in yourself to let him go.
0
r0manticide17
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#54
Report 13 years ago
#54
Tell him to get a grip
4
clairey87
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#55
Report 13 years ago
#55
I had a boyfriend who told me that if I left him, he'd commit suicide. I was desperatly unhappy in the relationship but wouldn't leave him because of what he had said. One of my friends talked some sense into me and I finished with him. Needless to say he didn't kill himself and I wish I hadn't been so silly as to believe him. Don't let this boy mess with your mind, what sort of person tells someone they'll kill themself if they don't go out with them? Not the sort of person you want to be in a relationship with!
4
Jennie88
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#56
Report 13 years ago
#56
(Original post by Nabqueen)
I don't know what to do.
There's this guy that told me that he liked me months ago, and I said i was flattered but didn't see him the same way, but he still goes on about it loads. And recently he's saying he wants to commit suicide or go out and get shot because I rejected him. Today he told me he wants to get shot so that he doesn't have to bother me anymore. I'm really worried and feel guilty but I don't know what I can do.
He keeps asking me why I don't like him and what's wrong with him. I know that he must have low self esteem and maybe I haven't helped but I can't go out with him just for his sake to make him feel better.
i no its hard to deal with it.my friend told me he was gona comit suicide cos his gf didnt love him as much as he loved her...but put it this way if ur suicidal u dont tell anyone.most people who are found dead if they've comit suicide ...its a surprise to their friends and family right?hope this helps it didnt help me much at the time but looking back i realised how stupid i was being by reacting to it...n he's still here today.
4
ledzep15
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#57
Report 13 years ago
#57
stay away from him, hes seems dangerous
4
RoCkPoRt
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#58
Report 13 years ago
#58
if he was serious about suicide he would be dead by now. people who talk about suicide only want to be pulled back and get attention. he won't do it. on the other note, don't let him guilt trip you into anything. relationships based on pity don't work. anyway, he sounds manipulative.
0
Dalimyr
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#59
Report 13 years ago
#59
(Original post by RoCkPoRt)
if he was serious about suicide he would be dead by now. people who talk about suicide only want to be pulled back and get attention.
Not always. I myself have considered suicide twice, and was serious about it both times. Three years ago, I had a knife in my hand, over my wrist. I spent no less than TWO HOURS sitting in that position, just thinking to myself about whether or not I really should take that final step...fortunately I didn't, and I had a rather pleasant couple of years after that...then it crumbled again. The second time (last year) I actually went through with my attempt. Tried to overdose myself, but it didn't work; spent almost all of the following day in the bathroom with my head over the toilet, I was throwing up so much. I've actually never told anyone about my second attempt until just now - it's something that although I've always known it was in my mind, was pushed to one side.

Although I'm pessimistic by nature, I do try to smile and laugh my way through life. However, I'm fully aware that if several things do go wrong in my life at one time I'm liable to be a risk to my own health. It's just something I have to put up with, and putting on a happy disposition, real or otherwise, is my way of trying to do that. I'm not seeking attention with my suicide attempts. I just can't really cope well with everything going wrong all at once.

We CAN be serious about suicide and still be alive; I'm living proof (no pun intended) of that. However, looking at NabQueen's case, I'm in agreement that he IS just seeking attention.
0
RoCkPoRt
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#60
Report 13 years ago
#60
i said people that talk about it with someone, they just want to be pulled out of it and get symptathy n attention.
0
X
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Do you like exams?

Yes (181)
18.8%
No (581)
60.33%
Not really bothered about them (201)
20.87%

Watched Threads

View All