Giving a phone number then storming off!

I was out with some friends as one of them is leaving the country to go home tomorrow.
We went to a couple of bars and at this last bar (which happened to be a gay bar...something I didn't quite pick up on), I noticed an absolutely gorgeous girl dancing and she was with a friend. The girl I liked was called Paula and her friend Natalie. I'm a bit shy (despite being totally comfortable with dancing. I'm more comfortable dancing with a girl than trying to impress on my own) so I didn't really make a move until it was too late and they left. When going to the bar later on, I realised they were just having a drink and were going to leave soon. I started chatting with them a bit, they told me they were about to go to another bar so I tried to convince them to stay. Ten minutes later, I went by their table: they were still there so I offered to buy both of them a drink as an excuse to chat to them a bit more...
Both girls seemed really friendly and really interesting but obviously Paula had caught my eye. So at the end, the other girl, Natalie, who I wasn't as attracted to, told us to exchange numbers. Apparently I'd made it a bit too obvious I was into Paula.... Paula seemed quite uncomfortable with the whole situation but she seemed fine giving me her number. I asked Natalie if she'd like to give me her number too, simply because I thought both of them seemed like really nice girls and considering the probability Paula is interested in me is pretty limited, I thought that it's always nice to get to know people, without it having to be about attraction.
Anyway, I asked Paula to enter her phone number into my mobile after Natalie was trying to give me it (but I was struggling with my phone so ended up asking the girl to enter it herself). God knows if it's actually her number...

Just after that, Paula stormed off barely saying goodbye. Considering the fact that Natalie was so enthusiastic about giving me her friend's number, I'm assuming Paula's single, maybe she broke up with a long-term boyfriend and isn't comfortable with dating... the fact she was shy about the whole thing is really endearing but I'm not too sure how to interpret this. I'm only assuming...

I know none of you girls (or guys) were there but any idea what her behaviour meant? and should I call Paula in a couple of days or text her? I'm a bit worried that if I text her she will be too "shy" to really respond.

Reply 1

laurenlauren

1

I get exactly why you did that, so don't worry you're not an idiot for doing what you did. However, i think the reason Paula may have stormed off is because whilst initially showing interest in her, by taking her friend's number, it implies (regardless of your intentions) that you may like her too. Whilst Paula may not have overtly showed that she was keen, perhaps, like you, she was shy or slightly complacent in that she was flattered by your attention but took it for granted. OR she might have been very drunk!? To get out of that situation, you need to SHOW that it is Paula that you like (regardless of how obvious you may have been, some girls can be weird with friends and guys that mix and get jealous easily/not pick up signals) Send Paula a nice message saying it was lovely to meet her and how ud maybe like to see her again? OR sending natalie a text saying how u liked meeting them, and how you like Paula, would like to see her, can she give any tips (making it VERY clear that it is Paula that you are interested in) as they're likely to discuss it, it will show her you like Paula NOT Natalie. If all fails and Paula doesn't like you, then at least you've tried and you might not see her again, so you have very little to lose! I'd recommend txting one or the other, as texting both may seem a little overkeen and Paula may be freaked out by it. Hope that helps in some way or another x

Reply 2

IjustlovetheIB

I think you should write Paula a message. Tell her that you'd like to see her again...maybe ask her if she'd like to go out to lunch or something, so you'll be able to talk and get to know each other better. If she doesn't answer, write Nathalie a message. Just a simple "hey, what's up?" and then ask her how Paula is doing. Tell her you wrote her a message and she didn't answer. And be like "is she mad at me or something?" and see what she says. She might give you good news ("oh Paula has no money on her phone") or not-so-good news ("I don't think she wants to see you"), but at least you'll know what's going on.

Good luck and let us know.

Reply 3

Sticky

OP

I think my post was confusing: I only got Paula's phone number. It was when she was walking off that I suggested Natalie give me her phone number (I was just being friendly and she knew very well I was into Paula) but she told me there was no point.

As for the advice: of course I can only text Paula. I'm just a bit worried she might not have the motivation to answer me back. Of course I don't want to pressure her! But I kind of got the impression she was maybe, just maybe, interested but just a bit too shy and still not comfortable with dating someone.

Reply 4

laurenlauren

1

Sticky

I think my post was confusing: I only got Paula's phone number. It was when she was walking off that I suggested Natalie give me her phone number (I was just being friendly and she knew very well I was into Paula) but she told me there was no point.

As for the advice: of course I can only text Paula. I'm just a bit worried she might not have the motivation to answer me back. Of course I don't want to pressure her! But I kind of got the impression she was maybe, just maybe, interested but just a bit too shy and still not comfortable with dating someone.

If you don't try you'll never know, from a girl's perspective, its always nice to see a guy trying. Text her, be casual (hi how are u, its bla bla bla from bla bla bla, just thought i'd send a txt to see how you are doing, it was nice to meet you at name of club, what have u been up to? x".) If she replies, great, see how it goes. If she doesn't then don't worry there are plenty more fish and at least you can set your mind at rest knowing. You seem like a nice guy which is a trait girls look for, so don't worry so much about it and just try it. Good luck!

Reply 5

IjustlovetheIB

^^ I totally agree. If you had the impression that she could be interested, you should give it a try. :smile:

Giving a phone number then storming off!

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