I can talk to some girls great, and they are nice and attractive and highly interesting. I'm not saying I've got an amazing track record, even there I might need advice, but I could do OK. I also have met the odd one, probably just one, who wasnt in the right situation, that I could have been with. But, I'm interested by some girls who are distant, mysterious, tough, don't give themselves up, stylish, independent. I mean, I've thought of this before. I'm quite savvy in some ways, interests etc, but maybe academiccy type family, earnestish, and these are real mysterious, street savvy girls I like.
As in, a certain kind of south-eastern girl, more street savvy and less earnest than the more proper/intellectual girls, but more style and intelligence than just plain common girls. With an authenticity and matter of fact confidence. Bascially non-'nice' (not unpleasant) but non-'nice' in the middle class way, girls who are sharp and tough and know what they're about, and hardish to fathom. It's a fascination with me. It's the respect I have for them plus the excitment of bridging a divide. My parents think I underestimate myself and may be misintepreting when I think I have no chance with these girls. It's not like I'm lacking with other kinds, there are girls I like in many different ways, about music, humour etc, I don't want it to sound some cliched, hung up on bad girls thing, it's more complex than that.
But I basically want to know what chance I got, any girls on here who are mates with girls like that or like that themselves, do they have a sensitive side(that fascinates me), would they go for a slighty different kind of guy, and how to work on it?
These girls are like I say not cliche bad girls,.they are tough but with an aura that they are tough enough to be nice, unpretentious, and with no wet 'niceness' but a certain concealed principle.
Um, everyone's different? It's impossible to say, if you meet a girl you like, you get to know her and ask her out. Simple.
Could you give us some examples of thte sort of people you mean? I'm thinking of the Ronnie Mitchell/Carla Connor/Blair Waldorf types?
I think this has to be the most detailed description of an 'ideal' woman, I have ever seen lol.
Too try and summarise more concisely it's this-
a)Cool and reserved, south -east style, working classish or not proper class, quietly confident
b)Tough edge, don't mess with them too much but not in a classless or ott way-'knows her rights' instinctively. Tough enough to be principled an polite/nice in moderation. Cool enough not to be trying to be badder than she is, she wouldnt need to. Authentic. Not involved in petty girly *****ing, v. independent and calls a spade a spade, not a wallflower. Can deal with guys with aplomb.
c)More street/savvish and less earnest/proper than girls I've been closer too and my background
d)Matter of fact, unsentimental, assured, but not slimy, fake or trying too hard, principled aura. Like they know life and have lived it beyond the books, but don't make a show of their smarts, which is very cool and commanding of respect. Say no more than necessary but not shy.
e)Attraction of them being less earnest/sensitive, more hard to fathom emotionally, promise of possible morsals of hidden depth and sensitivity beneath the tough exterior, infinite intrigue in trying to bridge class(vaguely defined) and temperament divide, and bring out things in each other, plus defy the odds to make a relationship. Plus maybe win over her when you are marginally softer and more sensitive(though not a wimp)_ because she has her principles and may also like to slight wear the trousers, she isnt the slapper just looking for any bad boy type.
But mainly it's their challenging, knowing they have some principle but trying to fathom it, and wondering whether there is a hidden sensitivity and tenderness that you have seen behind very moderate polite yet v. emotionally restrained things shes done, and does she want 'one guy' (for her one women) deep down, may even be the type to settle . Wanting to know what makes her who she is. She just has this toughness and constrained limited kindness mix I find fascinating. Loking for that type that has a heart of gold unseen, but is not forthcomingly warm or soft.
Sorry to ramble, but women are fascinating, wanted to share my feelings.
Oh, and shes quietly assertive with a very tidy, neat features and figure and skin, tough, economically pretty and savvy face, not imbued with sentiment, but mysterious nonetheless.
She might be the type who like a guy to treat her rough and she migh be something else. Bascially, I'm just trying to get lasses opinions, particularly from this part of the wolrd who may recognise aspects of it in someone they know. Just want advice on what may be possible about what shes like, whether I write myself off too much and stereotype, what is the best way to play it etc. I do have stuff to offer in my mind, but it's more challening to offer someone like this something, by virture of difference.
have you actually met a girl like this and wanna know how you can have a chance with her?
i say do what someone up there said.. get to know her better, keep trying (if she's not outwardly telling you to piss off and looking at you in disgust, no harm in trying again and again right?) and then wahey you're friends, ask her out. done.
I think the kind of girls you are describing would really appreciate it if you were just yourself. I don't think you should change your personality to make others happy - nobody is worth that.