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    i recently broke up with my boyfriend as i moved away to uni, and have met a guy i really like so far, and want to get to know better. whenever we go out, which has been almost every night, he chats to me and dances with me most of the night, and the last 2 nights i have gone back to his. however we have arranged 3 different days to meet up in the day and do something, so we can get to know each other sober, and each time something has come up from his end. he's been here 3 years and is in the football society so obviously i know he has stuff to do, but i can't help worrying that he is just using me and likes me when he is drunk. he has said he likes me, and he always cuddles me in the morning, all night he cuddles me, which i love, but i've been hurt so many times in the past im worried he'll do the same thing to me....
    I feel like this could go somewhere in the long run, and my friends in 2nd/3rd year have all said that hes lovely, but I just get so paranoid. Don't want to freak him out by being all pushy and ruin any poss chance, but don't want to just let him use me....
    please any advice would be muchly appreciated!
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    It sounds you have had bad luck in the past, but you have to let them go, he seems like a nice guy, and why would he prefer you drunk! Maybe when you go out at the night time one day - dont get drunk.. easy! I think you are being paranoid but it's understandable why after the past relationships you have mentioned. However i think you should still take it slow with him, you seemed to have got way to close way to fast! go to a restaurant or something at mid day when he's free and get to know eachother better Thats the best advice I could give you
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    I meant he only likes me when he's drunk... lol
    But yeah, your advice is helpful, and I know we got too "intimate" too quickly....
    He said he would take me out to dinner, but he was drunk, so he might not remember.... I just don't know how to ask him without seeming a bit.... pushy?? :s
    I took it as a good sign that this morning he was still being very cuddly with me and stuff, and we were chatting a bit, but he was really sleepy and didn't say much which made me feel like I was going on or annoying him. we were supposed to be going out this afternoon to sparrows fest, which is like a funfair at my uni, but he text me saying he threw up and feels ill. obv i don't think he's a liar, but part of me is worrying hes just saying it to try and get rid of me, coz its the third time we've made daytime plans that haven't happened because he had to do something/was ill...
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    (Original post by inkandhearts)
    I meant he only likes me when he's drunk... lol
    But yeah, your advice is helpful, and I know we got too "intimate" too quickly....
    He said he would take me out to dinner, but he was drunk, so he might not remember.... I just don't know how to ask him without seeming a bit.... pushy?? :s
    I took it as a good sign that this morning he was still being very cuddly with me and stuff, and we were chatting a bit, but he was really sleepy and didn't say much which made me feel like I was going on or annoying him. we were supposed to be going out this afternoon to sparrows fest, which is like a funfair at my uni, but he text me saying he threw up and feels ill. obv i don't think he's a liar, but part of me is worrying hes just saying it to try and get rid of me, coz its the third time we've made daytime plans that haven't happened because he had to do something/was ill...
    Hi,

    Seems to me you do lack abit of self confidence, don't force your brain to work to hard by thinking stupid stuff, thats not even true? Just let it go, he sounds like a nice guy the way you explained him, so maybe he is? Don't let your bad thoughts take over, maybe his excuses where really true and his not a lier. And you can just say to him "ohh i thought you was gonna take me out for dinner" (as a joke) see how he responds. Also tell him how you feel? Say to him that your not happy that his always drunk when your together so you want him sober.
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    I wouldn't agree to meet him until you're both sober; if he doesn't agree, don't see him. Otherwise you'll end up a booty call....
 
 
 
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