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How would you feel if your bf/gf told you that you wouldn't last forever? watch

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    Obviously, I don't expect my bf to be like "we're going to be together forever" etc etc. But what would you do if yours actually told you that you wouldn't? Like completely dismissed the idea of your relationship lasting? AND actually talked about future sex partners
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    I'd say break up. he's ready to break up at any time, as it seems.
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    I've done that on occasion with my boyfriend of 3 years....just casually when we talk about the future like whether I'd like kids, whether I'd get married etc, and he always gets upset when I don't mention him specifically in such plans. I don't want to put loads of pressure on this idea of the future and just trying to be realistic to be honest!
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    I'd say "Let's have a competition!"

    I will see how much pussy I can get and you'll see how much **** you can get.

    Whoever gets the most pussy/**** wins!
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    Actually, I did have a boyfriend tell me that. However, we both agreed on the same thing and he was my best friend before we got together, so we could talk to each other like buddies as well. We also went into the relationship knowing I was leaving in a few months and agreed that a LDR just wouldn't work, so we enjoyed what time we did have.

    And yes, him and I are still as best of friends as ever. I think it's because we took this approach to our relationship, which is why when it ended, we just went back to being the super close best friends we were before it.
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    A degree of circumspection is perfectly healthy, providing you don't throw the baby out with the bath-water: inveterate scepticism towards relationships can easily turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy when it stymies emotional investment and causes you to take important decisions unilaterally.
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    He's just being honest. Fair play to him.
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    Me and my boyfriend have been together 9 months and we talk about being with each other forever, getting married, having kids etc.. but it's different, I can't really explain. People will say it's too soon to know but it really is like we're made for each other and I wouldn't ever want anyone else. Obviously these plans wont come into force for another 10 years or so but it's nice knowing we'd like our relationship to last forever. It depends on the person and age but personally I'm 19 and I'd be inclined to break up with a person if they didn't think we had the potential to last.
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    my boyfriend said that but then convinced himself (and convinced me he completely believed this too) that it could very easily work.
    and then he decided to kiss some girl within days of arriving, and dump me, saying it won't work.
    just dump him now to save the pain later, i'd say. you know it's going to happen
    (but that might just be my bitterness talking )
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    (Original post by Profesh)
    A degree of circumspection is perfectly healthy, providing you don't throw the baby out with the bath-water: inveterate scepticism towards relationships can easily turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy when it stymies emotional investment and causes you to take important decisions unilaterally.
    cool story bro
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    Personally, the whole thing would feel a bit pointless to me. It would just seem really depressing and silly expecting it to end, it would seem a bit of a waste I suppose.

    But having said that, if I was really in love with someone I'd probably just try and change their mind. And I know a lot of people mutually feel like they're just in it for the current experience, so maybe I'm not like the norm!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Obviously, I don't expect my bf to be like "we're going to be together forever" etc etc. But what would you do if yours actually told you that you wouldn't? Like completely dismissed the idea of your relationship lasting? AND actually talked about future sex partners
    I'd say they were just being realistic.
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    Why do all relationships have to be long lasting? Can we all have fun?
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    My ex was like that, he used to sit there and go 'oh yea i'm never gonna get married, i'm never gonn settle down with anyone, I'm gonna travel the world and not be with anyone permanently' he used to go on for ages and quite often. It put me out a bit but I just figured he might change his mind / we'd just see how it went.

    In the end all it took was a month of uni and him not being allowed to flirt/dance with/ kiss other girls that ended it
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    (Original post by Profesh)
    A degree of circumspection is perfectly healthy, providing you don't throw the baby out with the bath-water: inveterate scepticism towards relationships can easily turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy when it stymies emotional investment and causes you to take important decisions unilaterally.
    Inveterate scepticism is subject to change when one meets the 'right' person. Presuming that is true, the boyfriend in the OP's case has not yet felt he has met the 'love of his life'... It could come with time though, so I think the OP shouldn't worry too much and persevere.

    OP: Don't worry!! It's okay, he might change his thinking as your relationship grows!
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    Tell them that they are completely right.


    Then break up with them there and then.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Obviously, I don't expect my bf to be like "we're going to be together forever" etc etc. But what would you do if yours actually told you that you wouldn't? Like completely dismissed the idea of your relationship lasting? AND actually talked about future sex partners
    How old are you?

    It would depend on how long you have been together and what stage you are in the relationship/ you're feelings.. if its early in the relationship, then fair enough, you have time to explore and see how you feel.
    If you've been together for a long time and he says that, then ofcourse anyone would feel uncomfortable.
    Obviously no one sets out to find their potential husband/wife, but if you have the feeling and deffinitely know you dont want to spend anymore time with the person you are dating or are thinking of other people, then why continue dating? But i guess some people just enjoy the company and most of us want to live the moment whilst we are young.

    When i am with someone, i like to think that there is a possibility of something more.

    Anyway.. if you feel deeply hurt by this (because you hoped for more).. and have been together for a long time, then give him the best relationship for the next 2 weeks and tell him he's right & goodbye.

    You'll find someone way better xxxxx
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    I'd feel unsecured about our relationship, if he ever says that, that means he's ready to break up with anytime soon. Might as well break up with him right now if your bf said that. On the other hand, me and my bf always say forever and are planning our future, i feel secured whenever we both say that. But in the back of my mind, i can't depend on words, i need action. Im trying to make everything well balanced. that way, i wont get hurt when it didn't happen.However, whats making me really worried is that, my bf is too dependent on me emotionally. I just agree with everything he says because i don't want to hurt him.
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    Ha, my ex went one further and told me he didn't really care if we broke up.

    So I decided to put it to the test and broke up with him the next day. He did care :awesome:
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    (Original post by Profesh)
    A degree of circumspection is perfectly healthy, providing you don't throw the baby out with the bath-water: inveterate scepticism towards relationships can easily turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy when it stymies emotional investment and causes you to take important decisions unilaterally.
    Please re-write for retards, or explain the terms:

    circumspection
    "throw the baby out with the bath-water"
    inveterate
    specticism
    stymies

    Much appreciated.
 
 
 
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