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The way teenager depend on each other and the amount of vainity in teensis embrasing. watch

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    (Original post by SilverDoe21)
    So what, you'd have teenagers walking round alone and 'independent' just to appear 'strong'? Being alone and friendless is exactly how people become insecure.

    Fool.
    No, people should really learn how to be happy with themselves and their own company. That way every summer we don't have to suffer the masses of people whining about how all their friends are away.


    (Original post by Pedrobear)
    Most people are afraid to be alone. It's nothing new. The stock (see also: kneejerk, defensive) response to pointing this out tends to be: "oh get a life!" "at least I'm not sad like you" -- ignoring, of course, that there is nothing sadder than the fact that they are so terrified of their own company that they cling on to other people like persistent little babies, or more aptly, like vultures.

    The more mature (but still tenuous) defence tends to be "humans are social animals". True to an extent. Being social isn't a biological trait, it's psychological. Arguably more of a biological imperative would be human heterosexuality, i.e. humans are heterosexual animals; being that our purpose - as with all mammals - is to reproduce, this is entirely true... so do you find as much issue with homosexuals as you do with those who enjoy being alone? A weak argument.

    A funny thing about this thread is the way that everyone who has their stock boyfriend/girlfriend/friends setup - their cute external comfort zone to pretty up their miserable internal life - has pretty much voiced the same dissent against the OP, so in effect they have all grouped together to vent against one person. Groups, organisations, gangs, flocks, masses, herds -- these are what "normal" (lol) people enjoy. Personally I can't think of any more sane response to life than to stay the hell away from most people.
    I don't agree that it is "sad" to need company, but I agree with everything else you've written. :yep:
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    In another thread there was an 18 year old man who had just moved to uni, complaining that he doesn't know anyone (duh nobody does) and saying he wants his mummy.
    Teenagers these days need a short, sharp shock and then they will perhaps get a grip of reality.
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    Everyone looks for reassurance, not just teenagers; and if it's not about looks, it's about intellect or likeability or athletic ability or something. And if you're not outwardly seeking compliments, you're probably at least inwardly sizing up the competition.
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    How is depending on friends vain? I'd have thought thinking you don't have to depend on them is vain.
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    (Original post by Pedrobear)
    Most people are afraid to be alone. It's nothing new. The stock (see also: kneejerk, defensive) response to pointing this out tends to be: "oh get a life!" "at least I'm not sad like you" -- ignoring, of course, that there is nothing sadder than the fact that they are so terrified of their own company that they cling on to other people like persistent little babies, or more aptly, like vultures.

    The more mature (but still tenuous) defence tends to be "humans are social animals". True to an extent. Being social isn't a biological trait, it's psychological. Arguably more of a biological imperative would be human heterosexuality, i.e. humans are heterosexual animals; being that our purpose - as with all mammals - is to reproduce, this is entirely true... so do you find as much issue with homosexuals as you do with those who enjoy being alone? A weak argument.

    A funny thing about this thread is the way that everyone who has their stock boyfriend/girlfriend/friends setup - their cute external comfort zone to pretty up their miserable internal life - has pretty much voiced the same dissent against the OP, so in effect they have all grouped together to vent against one person. Groups, organisations, gangs, flocks, masses, herds -- these are what "normal" (lol) people enjoy. Personally I can't think of any more sane response to life than to stay the hell away from most people.
    Yeah, that's a fantastic plan!!! From now on, children aren't allowed any social interaction until they've finished puberty. Then they'll all be happy, well-adjusted people who are very secure and have totally rational thinking.

    You're a genius.:rolleyes:

    I embrace a future as a hermit, I'm sure I'll find it extremely entertaining, not to mention instructive.
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    (Original post by NaturalDisaster)
    This has nothing to do with your post, but I'm afraid I didn't take your warning and have literally been laughing for about ten minutes at your sig. +rep for this (when I remember)
    lol it looks like the warning attracts people to open it. You better be careful next time
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    ii agree with the o.p
    in particular i really dont get people who write **** like im 18 and cant get a b.f/g.f or whatever.

    what irritates me isnt the fact they want a partner, if they wanted somebody in particular, thats fine, but its the fact they feel they need one,just because their friends do or thats the age a lot of people have had one.

    its like people are checking themselves against a list to what they believe will give them happiness, or comparing themselves to other people, not realising it really comes from within or appreciating things for their own sake.
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    (Original post by NaturalDisaster)
    Yeah, that's a fantastic plan!!! From now on, children aren't allowed any social interaction until they've finished puberty. Then they'll all be happy, well-adjusted people who are very secure and have totally rational thinking.

    You're a genius.:rolleyes:

    I embrace a future as a hermit, I'm sure I'll find it extremely entertaining, not to mention instructive.
    Very good. Yet none of that refuted my point, you just made a sarcastic show of yourself for no apparent reason.

    You've got it the wrong way around, by the way. Children interacting with each other tend to be pretty interesting, young minds are creative. It's usually around puberty that people tend to become idiots and succumb to peer pressure and ultimately mediocrity. A brief glimpse at H&R is all you need to prove that.
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    Jezza's take

    Mainstream media doesn't help with peer pressure...
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    (Original post by Pedrobear)
    Very good. Yet none of that refuted my point, you just made a sarcastic show of yourself for no apparent reason.

    You've got it the wrong way around, by the way. Children interacting with each other tend to be pretty interesting, young minds are creative. It's usually around puberty that people tend to become idiots and succumb to peer pressure and ultimately mediocrity. A brief glimpse at H&R is all you need to prove that.
    Wrong. I made a sarcastic show of myself because I enjoy it. Kind of in the same way I hang out with my friends because I enjoy it. And I hardly think the H&R forum on TSR is a good representation of all of the teenage population, it's just the pathetic ones who feel the need to post all their issues up on H&R. I don't need my friends to make me feel confident, but they're good company so I like having them around. Then again, we all have the mentality of 10 year olds so that might explain things. I don't see how enjoying the company of other teenagers when you're a teenager yourself makes you needy and pathetic. It might be true in a lot of cases, but I really don't see why it matters. Having friends doesn't make me mediocre. I'm still very much my own person, my friends just add a bit of spice and interest to life.
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    (Original post by Prince Rhyus)

    Jezza's take

    Mainstream media doesn't help with peer pressure...
    Let's all listen to the wise words of an award winning tool. (Jeremy Kyle, not Prince Rhyus)
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    1. Teenagers are still developing as people, you can't expect complete emotional maturity from young people.

    2. Emotional strength isn't all about walling yourself off from other people and striking out on your own.
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    OP speaks truth.
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    (Original post by Chumbaniya)
    1. Teenagers are still developing as people, you can't expect complete emotional maturity from young people.

    2. Emotional strength isn't all about walling yourself off from other people and striking out on your own.
    1. Yes you can.

    2. Having the ability to do that is useful, then you wouldn't have all the petty complaints that OP highlighted
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    (Original post by Chumbaniya)
    1. Teenagers are still developing as people, you can't expect complete emotional maturity from young people.
    2. Emotional strength isn't all about walling yourself off from other people and striking out on your own.

    Mug.There are kids aged 11 who can look after themselves and their siblings all on there own.They are very mature.

    You are a complete mug.
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    (Original post by Amuroray)
    Mug.There are kids aged 11 who can look after themselves and their siblings all on there own.They are very mature.

    You are a complete mug.
    How many 11 year olds do you know who can look after themselves and their siblings? They're not that common. But on the other hand you get some people in the mid twenties who lack the maturity to look after themselves, let alone a child. The majority of teenagers are pretty much at the mercy of their hormones, although each situation is different.
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    The reasons for what OP has observed are biological and social evolution.


    Teens are in puberty.

    Puberty = the transition from childhood to adulthood (and everything that entails).

    Teens are going through the stage where they become fertile, and sexually mature (gain the ability to have offspring). A part of this process is testing oneself's ability to attract the opposite sex (this can be observed in any species of animal going through adolescence). Hence the vanity/self-conciousness that the OP has observed. (Also the factor that the teens are growing into independently-functioning adults, and often experiment with many different 'identities', in order to find themselves a niche as an independent personality (from their parents)).
    This point can also be argued to have been maginified by Western corporatism/advertising as well as the universal penetration of the media into every corner of or lives.
    People want to sell products. Sexually attractive people on billboards/TV quite literally 'attract' people's attention. The beautiful person then plugs the product. This is repeated, and reinforced (In order that we (the consumers) unconciously associate that product with ourselves being more beautiful/rich/successful if we buy the advertiser's product).

    The fact that teens depend on each other more is also attributable to their status as adolescents, since as once they are adults, they will need friends (in evolutionary caveman terms, women communally looking after children was easier, as was men hunting together, since they could work in teams to trap their next meal).


    OP's opinion that this is pathetic says more about the OP than it does about teens. Modally, teens across the world follow this pattern of vanity, and increased social dependence, and they always have done (even Plato, the Ancient Greek observed this).

    The fact that OP finds this pathetic, I would see as a likely result of his/her highly suggestible personality, being over-influenced by Western culture. In our culture, individuality and freedom is prized (you may not see it this way, but believe me, after visiting some other areas of the world, you will come to realise how focused our society is on the individual (hence capitalism (or possibly vice-versa, because of capitalism)).
    OP is so keen to be an individual, and self-sufficient, that they scorn other for being influence by/needing help/companionship from others. OP does this without realising that the reason that they are belittling this behaviour is the behaviour itself.

    No man is an island - a quote for OP to reflect on I believe.
 
 
 
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