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Marriage at the age of 20 - good or bad? watch

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    Bad bad bad. Even my best mate who's had his girlfriend for 3 years, says he's going to wait till mid/late twenties if they are still together to get married. Just so he can get well into his career and start to be secure job/house etc wise.
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    Bit stupid to go into that kind of commitment at that age, in my opinion. Then again i think the whole idea of marriage is pointless so don't listen to me
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    My mom got married to my dad when she was 20 and they're still happy being together. It really depends on how much you want to and how long you've known each other. If you really want it then go for it. The worse that can happen is you end up getting a divorce.
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    The reason I say 'parent consent' is because my parents are very strict when it comes to dating. There is only sex before marriage, and the thought of a guy even being with me and not being married just makes my parents...loony.

    I also say he likes me more than I like him is because before him I was dating a guy for 5 years, and he broke my heart. So thus I put up this invisable wall around my heart as to never let a guy in until I was 100% sure he was the one. Heart break is one thing no amount of superglue can fix.

    and 3rd we have been together for around 6 ish months. He done it very professional, but asking my father is he could get to know me. He comes over and we talk and relax etc. Sometimes we sit with the family, sometimes we are alone.

    The point is, the reason I needed random people's advice was because friends and family all seem to want me to go ahead with it, and that's great, because he is a great guy. I just sometimes feel like too much is changing too quickly. Normally it's the guy that panics when marriage is mentioned lol, This is just a very rare case.

    I promise I won't do like Julia Roberts in The runaway bride and leave lol.
    sometimes advice from a stranger is just the perfect advice, because they dont know you and thus will give you advice based on no judgement etc.

    Thank you all for your input. xx
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    In my opinion, 6 months is too soon... You've not been together long enough to see how you're going to work with each other long term to be honest.

    But that said, it's up to you. If you heart is telling you yes, go for it. I've been with my man for 2 years and if he proposed to me tomorrow, I'd say yes in a heartbeat.
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    All depends on the couple. My parents have been married since they were eighteen and still going strong. Personally, i think you should experience life a little more before settling down.
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    (Original post by hunnie)
    The reason I say 'parent consent' is because my parents are very strict when it comes to dating. There is only sex before marriage, and the thought of a guy even being with me and not being married just makes my parents...loony.

    I also say he likes me more than I like him is because before him I was dating a guy for 5 years, and he broke my heart. So thus I put up this invisable wall around my heart as to never let a guy in until I was 100% sure he was the one. Heart break is one thing no amount of superglue can fix.

    and 3rd we have been together for around 6 ish months. He done it very professional, but asking my father is he could get to know me. He comes over and we talk and relax etc. Sometimes we sit with the family, sometimes we are alone.

    The point is, the reason I needed random people's advice was because friends and family all seem to want me to go ahead with it, and that's great, because he is a great guy. I just sometimes feel like too much is changing too quickly. Normally it's the guy that panics when marriage is mentioned lol, This is just a very rare case.

    I promise I won't do like Julia Roberts in The runaway bride and leave lol.
    sometimes advice from a stranger is just the perfect advice, because they dont know you and thus will give you advice based on no judgement etc.

    Thank you all for your input. xx
    If you have doubts, even just about your life changing too fast, then you are not ready. With this kind of thing you need to be 100% sure. If he's not swept you off your feet and broken down that invisible wall around your heart, then you should wait until he does. There is no problem with waiting for things to progress naturally.

    You've never said you love him. Liking someone who is a great person is not enough for marriage, IMO.
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    I have known my boyfriend since I was 15. I want no-one else and will marry him in August when I will be 21. I love him to bits and he is my soul-mate.
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    Please don't do it. It may make your family friends and bf happy, but it sounds like that's the only reason you want to do it. And it doesn't sound like you love him. Think about what will happen if you do marry him and then meet someone you fall in love with. You're young and you're got so much time for that to happen, there's no reason to get married at the moment. If you do like this guy, date him a while longer. But don't marry him until you're sure he's the one.
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    Bad, it's too young.
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    The question you must have asked is do you actually love him and then surely you've wondered about how life would be with him? Because if he's got to know your family/parents and asked them first, and then has now proposed, he sure must have already foreseen what life would be like with you. After going through your family, he'd be an idiot to mess you around really.

    I can only give me opinion based on what you've mentioned and really since it's something as large as marriage then naturally you're going to pessimistic. It happens all the time, for me on a much smaller scale, and I find I just have to plunge in if it's worth it. If it does work out then fair enough but at least I gave it a shot. He sounds good enough for you and really if you don't want to accept then can you imagine finding anyone else like him? Obviously you're at a young age but as cliche as it is somethings really do come once in a lifetime. Marriage may tough but it's brilliant at the same time. I guess with your studies your main issue would be to make sure you avoid being bogged in marriage related stuff which should be fine.

    I realise my post is a bit here and there, so I'll sum by saying if you think he's worth living for then go for it. My mother got married at sixteen and she had less to little choice over the man herself and had me when she was 2 years younger than you, and my elder sister even before that, and by god I'm certain she had a lot of trouble with marriage that I do not know of it. But it's part of life, and at the end of it, I as her son can say that there is no one else on this earth living today that matters more to me than my mother. Just another dimension there
 
 
 
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