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    (Original post by sidra111)
    thanks jasmine, it was very encouraging however if you had given me information about headscarf, it would've been more useful to me as i only wear headscarf not hijab:p: :yes:
    Your father will have aspirations for you, that is only natural - some of those will be educational, some religious. I've noticed in recent years more and more of my Muslim friends have started wearing the headscarf, tbh most of the ones your age are in hijab. Not sure why but in my age group (10 years older) it seemed a lot less common. For most of my younger friends, it is a personal choice that they are very proud of, rather than one that feels forced, and I do think it needs to be a personal decision.

    However, you are at a difficult age as far as parental control goes. Once you go to uni, you are at an age where you should have more personal control. Are you planning to go away to study? If you are, I'd leave it until then because it should hurt your Father less.

    Maybe he is proud because your wearing the scarf (now it is becoming so universal) makes you look pious/religious? Maybe he is afraid that your stopping wearing it is a rejection of your faith or that other Muslims will judge him because they will think you are rejecting Islam?

    You haven't really explained your reasons for not wanting to wear it and this may be worrying your Father. Is it because you want more chance to assert yourself through what you wear and feel trapped by wearing it? Or because you feel it makes you stand out or marks you out? Or it it because you don't feel strongly about your religion and don't see the need to wear it for that reason? Obviously, your family will fear it is the latter and you are moving away from them.

    You could consider other ways of wearing a headscarf for the time being - a friend just covers her hair, wrapping it almost like a turban. She's got lots of different coloured scarves to match her outfits and she looks great.

    Otherwise, you need to sit down and talk to your father. Unfortunately, the reasons you could give for not wanting to wear it - being more comfortable with western dress, wanting freedom, not feeling a strong religious need to wear it - are all, in their own way, a rejection of your parents and their values, especially since your sister wants to wear hijab and you have already chosen to wear the scarf. You'll need to explain your feelings very well if you want him to agree without being hurt by your attitude. Otherwise, you need to wait until you are older.
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    (Original post by S_123)
    A lot of people don't wear it though? :confused: So OP doesn't have to and can still be a muslim.

    Also OP, shocked by your dad's comments. I guess he was just being bitter because you've decided to make your own decisions and he feels like he's losing (the old) you. In fact, if I'm wearing too 'revealing' clothing my parents say I look ugly too :p:
    so what if alot of people dont wear it? that just goes to show that they are not following their religon properly, not that it is not obligatory.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by MidnightRain1)
    Hi, im a Muslim too! In Islam its compulsory to wear a scarf! They are different ways of wearing a scarf, so try different ways, but DONT take it off, it will be stupid to do so. I assume Sidra, you cant. Its forbiden in Islam, this life is a test and for Allah you cant even do that. Im 12 and I wear a scarf everywhere.
    Your brainwashed At that age why the hell should someone wear it if they didn't want to! God loves you and created you let him judge when judgement day comes.

    Bunch of hipocrites wear scarves not everyone but lots do. A customer that was muslim LIED to me straight to my face - she had a head scarf on and it was your Muslim holy month Ramadan ! I think your god will be pissed off at you for lying rather than wearing a ******* scarf! Get a grip
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by thewiseone)
    MashAllah sisters for keeping the faith in this contemporary, western and largely anti-islamic world... I praise you both and hope that you are able to continue without any form of opresssion and are able to keep on wearing that scarf with pride and joy in your hearts.
    Ameen
    Anti Islamic world? It's Muslims and Jews that segregate themselves and say oh we are not accepted in the community. It's ******** and the government is too stupid to realise what your all upto.if it's so anti Islam you should go live in Pakistan or wherever else. And NO I'm not racist but the 'i'm a Muslim your racist' card gets played way too ******* much. Your bunch of hypocrites not everyone but a lot of muslims I've known.
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    (Original post by foreverchosenone)
    ISLAM WILL DOMINATE THE KHALIFA WILL RISE AND ALL YOU KAFIROEN ******* AND FAKE MUZZIES WILL ****** GET IT DO YOU ALL HEAR ME

    I AM ****** 1 FOREVER CHOSEN ONE

    NONE CANCOMPARE TO ME

    i am 1.
    Your a **** **** off
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    Harami. How dare you even contemplate such a thing? Off with yer head.
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    (Original post by mare?)
    Al you people talking about receiving extra points as if life is some kind of game
    It is if you're a Muslim.

    You get two angels remember (one on the left and one of the right). You can play the game and win and be happy or you can lose and suffer the consequences.

    (Original post by sidra111)
    i don't want to wear headscarf anymore. i put on scarf first because i had a few white hair and didn't want anyone to find out that i have white hair. after 3 years, i take off my scarf because i didn't want to wear it anymore and thought i wore it myself first and can take off easily. i took it off when i went to sixth form college and my dad got very angry at me so i put it back on:eek: . he didn't shout at me but his facial expressions were conveying the message of his angriness. once, i went to bank with my dad to open my account and my hair was open. my dad said "you look very ugly without scarf" which just nearly killed me. i couldn't stop myself crying and cried a lot because it was the first time he said something like that to me. when i shared with my mom, she also shouted at me back and said 'i am muslim girl and should wear it'. non of dad's sister' daughters wear scarf and they are much older than me as i am only 17 and they are 29,25, 21.
    in addition, my mom and dad really used to respect me but after the issue of scarf, i don't talk to my dad as i used to before and neither he do
    i don't know what shall i do? i will be going to university next year and afraid if i try to take it off again, i don't know what my dad would do to me.
    please give me advice on what should i do. whatever i'm doing is right or wong
    any advice would be very appreciated
    You have a couple choices:

    1. Wear the headscarf for your families sake.
    2. Wear the headscarf for your religions sake.
    3. Wear the headscarf for both your families and religions sake.
    4. Don't wear the headscarf and try and live the best you can.
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    (Original post by AnAverageSmoker)
    Y'all wear them in the shower too?
    Sure thing!
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    (Original post by MidnightRain1)
    Hi, im a Muslim too! In Islam its compulsory to wear a scarf! They are different ways of wearing a scarf, so try different ways, but DONT take it off, it will be stupid to do so. I assume Sidra, you cant. Its forbiden in Islam, this life is a test and for Allah you cant even do that. Im 12 and I wear a scarf everywhere.
    lol I don't think your muslims are singing from the same hym sheet.
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    (Original post by Makaveli_The_Don)
    Harami. How dare you even contemplate such a thing? Off with yer head.
    be a bit mature please or do not post
    you seem to be a muslim and should be aware that you shouldn't use word like 'harami'
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    (Original post by foreverchosenone)
    ISLAM WILL DOMINATE THE KHALIFA WILL RISE AND ALL YOU KAFIROEN ******* AND FAKE MUZZIES WILL ****** GET IT DO YOU ALL HEAR ME

    I AM ****** 1 FOREVER CHOSEN ONE

    NONE CANCOMPARE TO ME

    i am 1.
    hehe your funny
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    (Original post by MidnightRain1)
    Hi, im a Muslim too! In Islam its compulsory to wear a scarf! They are different ways of wearing a scarf, so try different ways, but DONT take it off, it will be stupid to do so. I assume Sidra, you cant. Its forbiden in Islam, this life is a test and for Allah you cant even do that. Im 12 and I wear a scarf everywhere.
    Hi, welcome to TSR!

    Your post is utterly wrong.
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    So your father considers a headscarf more important than his own daughter? Disown him.
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    Well, I am quite anti-religious as I think it is violent, oppressive and outdated but I will try and keep my opinion fair, unlike some of the religious people in this thread (I'm looking at you first reply). Do whatever the hell you want. Your parents will (hopefully) still love you. I'm not sure how stupid they are, but it is unlikely they will disown their own daughter for not wearing a scarf.
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    (Original post by S_123)
    Live how you want. The hijab isn't mandatory for Islam.
    where does in quran it says it's mandatory
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    (Original post by Pickford)
    Well, I am quite anti-religious as I think it is violent, oppressive and outdated but I will try and keep my opinion fair, unlike some of the religious people in this thread (I'm looking at you first reply). Do whatever the hell you want. Your parents will (hopefully) still love you. I'm not sure how stupid they are, but it is unlikely they will disown their own daughter for not wearing a scarf.
    hmmm wouldn't take bets on this :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by anonnumber6)
    "Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty:
    That will make for greater purity for them:
    And Allah is well acquainted with all that they do.
    And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty;"
    People wear the hijab out of modesty? Is that why I see so many hijab-wearing girls with their thongs hanging out? :rolleyes:

    I don't understand Islamic culture at all. It's completely incompatible with Western culture.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    you shouldn't have to wear it especially if you have no intention of wearing it and you don't actually WANT to. as there's really no point to that. so stop trying to get loads of attention by posting a thread that you know will make people think ''ah Islam, forcing people to so and so ....''. and just sort out your own life- you're an adult and explain to your parents that you dont want to wear it as sadly youre not islamic and so its not even taken into account anyway so you might as well stop.
    i have not intension of making people realise that islam is not a good religion or niether to get their attention. islam gives you freedom to do whatever you want. i was so wrorried and whenever i am worried i shared with my mom. recently i had arguement about scarf with my mom so cannot share my feeling with her. i was feeling so lonely and depressed and to be able to calm down i asked for advice to people on what should i do.
    in addition, if i asked my dad to take off my scarf, he would go mad at me and probably scold my mom for not doing a good upbringing of me or not told me the right way to talk to parents. i don't want my mom to be insulted becasue of me. furthermore, it could have a bad impact on my younger siblings that their older sister is not listening to parents and my parents might blame me if anyone of my bothers and sisters didn't listen to my parents. my parents always used to proud on me but the issue scarf has spoiled everything
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    ok so lots of people are saying its mandatory to wear a headscarf
    im muslim and my mums never forced me to wear one...shes always said that as long as you maintain self respect theres no need to wear a head scarf..and surely Islam is not about wearing a piece of cloth over your head?
    personally i think scarves look beautiful on some girls (:
    it should be upto you weather you want to wear one
    oh and as to your parents i know how it feels but to be honest unless you start letting them know you have decisions of your own to make, they're always going to force you to do what the want you to do
    i hope this helps (y)
 
 
 
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