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Girls; what is you mentality when 'going out'? watch

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    I've never been out 'on the pull', I just don't like having sex with randomers.
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    I go to have fun with my friends, flirt/dance with a few guys, and get tipsy, and I enjoy getting dressed up. I don't go out looking to pull or get laid because I have a boyfriend.
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    (Original post by Beadle's About)
    What the majority of girls are saying here doesn't correlate with my own personal experiences at all. I've found clubs to be good places to pull, and this idea that girls don't want to be approached or chatted up is nonsense. I haven't found this at all.

    If 'girls don't go out to pull', how do you explain my own personal experiences? Was it all a fluke?

    Sure, only a small percentage will be willing to go home with a guy the same night as meeting him. I acknowledge this. But usually if a girl doesn't want to go home with me the same night I meet her, we end up exchanging numbers and meeting up at a later date.

    Are you actually saying 'girls don't go out to pull', or rather 'most girls don't have one night stands'? You've got a point about the one night stands...they're harder to get. But not impossible.

    From my experience, I can say in the average UK club, there is always SOMEONE (female) who is horny and looking for one night stand. She might be 'in estrous', in other words 'in heat' or hornier due to where she is in her cycle and therefore more susceptible to be picked up for same night lay. All a guy has to do is approach her and not say/do anything too stupid and she is his.

    Then there are the other vast majority of girls in the club, who are there for a night out, who will talk to me and have a nice conversation and the odds are we end up exchanging numbers and end up meeting up for coffee at a future date. These girls are generally interested in me, but not up for a one night stand, which I respect and that is why I exchange numbers with them and see them another time. Some of this group of girls may be taken or simply not interested in exchanging numbers, and this is fine also, I respect that but still enjoy meeting them.

    There then is that small percentage of girls who will reject EVERY guy who approaches them, though I've rarely found this. If I encounter a rude girl or someone who just isn't interested AT ALL, then I leave them alone and move onto another girl. These girls are rare, though. The way I approach women, I rarely get told to '**** off' etc. I usually get smiles and blushes, etc and starting a conversation from there is easy as pie. In fact most of the bad responses I've had in nightclub have been from jealous friends and not the girl who I actually approach, and this makes sense because women are jealous as hell when a guy approaches her friend and not them!

    So I can't really conclude that 'girls go out to dress up and lap up attention, but they aren't interested in pulling'. Sorry but I've found the opposite to be true.

    Maybe it's just me, but I am very comfortable approaching and talking to people, and perhaps this is why things are the way they are for ME.

    I don't care whether a girl 'came out to pull or not'; most girls I talk to I end up having a solid interaction with, so what does it matter WHY they came out? If I end up taking one home or getting her number, then who cares WHY she came out.

    I reckon I could walk into any average UK nightclub and pull this off and my experiences would be similar. Sorry, I don't want to sound big-headed or like I'm bragging (that was NOT my intention at all)...I'm merely explaining to you that this idea that girls 'don't want to pull guys' is not true at all. Maybe they don't want to pull a drunken ********, but if you are a guy who understands how to properly approach women, then things are different.

    I get what you're saying, I think I interpreted your meaning of 'pulling' wrong. I thought you meant getting into girls knickers, which is what most guys in my experience usually mean when they say that. If you explained that in some of your erlier posts you'd probably have found that more girls agreed with you. A girls conversation about men who 'are out to pull' is usually met with a lot of eye rolling and general mocking of men :p: perhaps they mean different things to the different genders.
    I still am against the idea that girls go out in the first place intentionally to pull. I do however believe that if the girl and the guy got talking and he was nice enough she wouldn't refuse him, but it's more of an added bonus than the intention.
    There's always some girl. No denying that.
    Yeah... I'm one of the girls who rejects pretty much every guy. I just wouldn't feel comfortable around someone I met for the first time in a club. And plus, said guys usually tend to hang around and - as I said - I really just want to dance with my girls.
    Haha, jealousy, but against who? Lots of girls tend to get more jealous of the guy rather than the girl, for 'parting the group'. It's a pack thing I suppose, and quite an embarrassing thing to admit to, as it sounds quite wierd, no?
    Anyhow, back to the original point: for most girls, pulling is more a gleeful side-affect
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    Serotonin boost! Endorphins! Dancing! Having fun with friends and not stressing about work, not really to 'pull' anyone, not that I'm aversed to 'pulling' someone - but I definitely would not snog a stranger.
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    (Original post by Beadle's About)
    At the end of the day....does it matter if a girl 'is out to pull' or 'out to have a a few drinks and a dance with her friends'?. As far as I'm concerned, it's possible to pull a girl from either category, especially since I am different to most men.

    When I approach a girl, I don't concern myself with 'whether she's out to pull or not', I just concentrate on having a solid interaction and if there's any mutual attraction and it goes anywhere then great, if not then I respectfully wish her a good night and move onto another girl.

    If I take a girl home from a club, does it matter if 'she went out with the intention to pull or not?'. Either way, the result was the same, i.e. both me and the girl met someone we liked and went home with them.

    Given that it's possible to pull a girl whether she went out to pull or not, then it doesn't actually matter whether pulling was her intention or not because either way she still hooked up with a guy she was attracted to.

    So in fact, this whole thread is a pointless argument. GUYS, YOU CAN PULL A GIRL WHETHER SHE 'WENT OUT TO PULL' OR NOT.....ALL THAT MATTERS IS IF THERE IS ANY MUTUAL ATTRACTION OR CHEMISTRY THERE. If there is, then the fact she 'didn't go out to pull' doesn't matter. I've proved this TIME AND TIME AGAIN and I'll take my own REAL WORLD experiences over a bunch of bitter women in a student forum any day.
    You've completely changed your point. You actually did say all girls are going out to pull at the start. I agree with what you're saying now as its completely different. You've finally realised you were wrong and have a round about way of admitting it.
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    (Original post by Arnotts)
    You've completely changed your point. You actually did say all girls are going out to pull at the start. I agree with what you're saying now as its completely different. You've finally realised you were wrong and have a round about way of admitting it.
    Maybe I should've phrased it as 'whether or not a girl goes out with the intention to pull or not, it doesn't matter because it's still possible to pull them anyway'. I guess this is what I meant. So the original point of this post was irrelevant.
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    I will use logic to answer this question.

    Would girls go to a nightclub where there were no boys? No they would not!

    At least homosexuals are honest about why they go to nightclubs. Hence why there are gay nights and lesbian nights because they obviously go out to hook up.

    I got told by a female friend that if she has a boyfriend, when she goes out she dresses causually, but when she's single she puts her low top and short skirts on. Read from that what you will.

    Probably the type of girls who go to cheesy nightclubs to pull are not the same type of girls who like posting on the student room message board.

    QED
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    (Original post by ~Kat~)
    I get what you're saying, I think I interpreted your meaning of 'pulling' wrong. I thought you meant getting into girls knickers, which is what most guys in my experience usually mean when they say that. If you explained that in some of your erlier posts you'd probably have found that more girls agreed with you. A girls conversation about men who 'are out to pull' is usually met with a lot of eye rolling and general mocking of men :p: perhaps they mean different things to the different genders.
    I still am against the idea that girls go out in the first place intentionally to pull. I do however believe that if the girl and the guy got talking and he was nice enough she wouldn't refuse him, but it's more of an added bonus than the intention.
    There's always some girl. No denying that.
    Yeah... I'm one of the girls who rejects pretty much every guy. I just wouldn't feel comfortable around someone I met for the first time in a club. And plus, said guys usually tend to hang around and - as I said - I really just want to dance with my girls.
    Haha, jealousy, but against who? Lots of girls tend to get more jealous of the guy rather than the girl, for 'parting the group'. It's a pack thing I suppose, and quite an embarrassing thing to admit to, as it sounds quite wierd, no?
    Anyhow, back to the original point: for most girls, pulling is more a gleeful side-affect
    Well I originally thought that the girls in this post were claiming that women go out to clubs with ABSOLUTELY NO INTEREST in pulling. I know that's ******** and that is why I refuted their claims. As I've previously said, I stand by my point that 'whether a girl goes out with the intention of pulling or not, it's still possible to pull her' (assuming she's receptive to whoever approaches her).

    When I say 'pull', that COULD mean a one night stand, but it's far more likely it ends up being a really solid conversation, followed by an exchange of numbers with a meet up at a later date, and maybe a kiss before leaving the club sometimes too.

    As for girls being 'jealous' of one another getting attention from men....I really don't understand WHY this is, but it IS something I've noticed happen consistently. It must just be something to do with female psychology. It's happened on numerous occasions to me, where I'll take one girl's phone number and then later her friend will try to undermine it by telling me the original girl wasn't really interested in me (which I found wasn't true at all). I found out the 2nd girl was simply jealous and trying to get me to forget about the first girl. Silly and petty but that is female nature I guess.

    Glad we cleared this up anyway.
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    (Original post by Beadle's About)
    Sorry, but I've been around women long enough to know what the real truth is.
    your mum doesn't count
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    (Original post by daytona01)
    your mum doesn't count
    No, but YOUR mum does...and your sister too :-)
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    (Original post by noobynoo)
    I will use logic to answer this question.

    Would girls go to a nightclub where there were no boys? No they would not!

    At least homosexuals are honest about why they go to nightclubs. Hence why there are gay nights and lesbian nights because they obviously go out to hook up.

    I got told by a female friend that if she has a boyfriend, when she goes out she dresses causually, but when she's single she puts her low top and short skirts on. Read from that what you will.

    Probably the type of girls who go to cheesy nightclubs to pull are not the same type of girls who like posting on the student room message board.

    QED
    Lol is it just me and the person you quoted who are waiting for the 'logic' in your post?

    It seems that personal experiences carry much of your own logic, which is a shame because your mind is defined much more rigidly than those with a greater appreciation of individual taste, and how the entire female population does not succumb to these conceptuality simple-minded mannerisms you so dearly hold as a proof. It is disappointing that you have such a narrow view of the motivations for individuals to go out - you hold your preconceptions that all girls/gays/lesbians go out to pull presumably because of the minority who openly (and most often loudly) reinforce this belief. Pre-conceptions are healthy, but you have to be willing to discard them and keep an open mind when it comes to the motivation behind an individual's action.

    I think you were using the terms 'logic' and 'QED' in more of a joking way, so I shall not make a meal of it :p:


    RE the lack of logical reasoning in your post, I leave you with a resounding;

    QED
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    (Original post by Beadle's About)
    Maybe I should've phrased it as 'whether or not a girl goes out with the intention to pull or not, it doesn't matter because it's still possible to pull them anyway'. I guess this is what I meant. So the original point of this post was irrelevant.
    Yes I think the confusion lied in the fact that I thought you were saying every girl goes out with the intention of getting a guy to go home to have sex with, the way it is for a guy. Girls definitions of 'pulling' is different to guys as they are really after different things. Most girls want to 'pull' a relationship, or if theres no one they're interested in, just attention. Most guys that go out might want a relationship as well but its really about pulling for sex.
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    (Original post by Arnotts)
    . Most girls want to 'pull' a relationship, or if theres no one they're interested in, just attention. Most guys that go out might want a relationship as well but its really about pulling for sex.
    True to a point....but there ARE girls out in clubs who are up for one night stands (they may be in the minority, I can't say for sure). But not many will openly admit that, of course.
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    (Original post by noobynoo)
    I will use logic to answer this question.

    Would girls go to a nightclub where there were no boys? No they would not!

    At least homosexuals are honest about why they go to nightclubs. Hence why there are gay nights and lesbian nights because they obviously go out to hook up.

    I got told by a female friend that if she has a boyfriend, when she goes out she dresses causually, but when she's single she puts her low top and short skirts on. Read from that what you will.

    Probably the type of girls who go to cheesy nightclubs to pull are not the same type of girls who like posting on the student room message board.

    QED
    I have, and I've also gone to gay clubs. Makes a nice change not getting groped all night by randomers.
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    (Original post by fidelity_blue)
    I have, and I've also gone to gay clubs. Makes a nice change not getting groped all night by randomers.

    This here ^ why do guys not understand this?
    Guys wouldn't go to an all male nightclub, but that doesn't mean you can base our psychology on yours.
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    # of guys who go out and get laid should be pretty close to the # of girls who go out and get laid, it's not like it's the same girl ******* every guy who ever claims to have pulled in a club.

    Since girls are much more likely to be the liars, we'll just assume that they are going and pulling in clubs.
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    (Original post by ~Kat~)
    This here ^ why do guys not understand this?
    Guys wouldn't go to an all male nightclub, but that doesn't mean you can base our psychology on yours.
    If you don't want attention from men, don't go out then, and don't get dressed up. I have to laugh how some women get all dressed up and go to nightclubs, then COMPLAIN about attention from men. If you're going to complain or not want attention, just stay at home then.

    Though the groping from drunken ********s I can understand you being annoyed by that I guess. But that's not going to change anytime soon, you can't just change 95% of the male population by complaining about it.
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    (Original post by Beadle's About)
    As for girls being 'jealous' of one another getting attention from men....I really don't understand WHY this is, but it IS something I've noticed happen consistently.
    Kat hit the nail on the head (quoted below) saying that girls aren't getting jealous of the other girl getting attention, but instead are getting jealous/frustrated at the group being broken up... thats why you can easily be all over a girl you just met a few minutes ago, so long as you've got her pack entertained, though either a wingman or just keeping them involved in the conversation

    - damn, I haven't talked about the logistics of this for a while lol :p:

    (Original post by ~Kat~)
    Haha, jealousy, but against who? Lots of girls tend to get more jealous of the guy rather than the girl, for 'parting the group'. It's a pack thing I suppose, and quite an embarrassing thing to admit to, as it sounds quite wierd, no?
    Anyhow, back to the original point: for most girls, pulling is more a gleeful side-affect
    p.s.

    (Original post by Beadle's About)
    No, but YOUR mum does...and your sister too :-)
    I coughed up a lung laughing at this xP

    xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 
 
 
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