Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
x Turn on thread page Beta
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    im staying in student accomodation been here for about a week now. The people in my flat are friendly enough although everyone seems to do there own thing and some of them know people here so they have been going out with those people. I had a few lectures and have spoken to other people but nothing yet my freshers week was very uneventfull its really is not what i expected at all
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    Give it more time. Despite how it may appear no one actually makes friends within a week. You will get to know people better as long as you continue to make efforts.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    You just need to take a deep breath and go and make conversation with someone and try and get your flat mates to go and watch a footy game down the pub or something/kick around.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    Get razzed, pull some legendary stunts = friends.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    you can't expect to have made a ton of best friends in a week! give it time, soon you'll get to know people more in your lectures and your housemates. Make sure you use the first few weeks wisely and talk to as many people as you can and try and join in everything, because after a few weeks people start to drift off into groups and it will get harder. Join some societies so you meet people with similar interests
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by M1F2R3)
    Get razzed, pull some legendary stunts = friends.
    thats my point with who i dont know anyone

    Has anyone been in the same position in the first few weeks in the past and turned it around<
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Yeah I have this feeling... seems like people are already getting clicky and i've been here only 10 days... Really starting to get me down... I'm doing tennis and football but will that help making friends? Also girls seem even harder to get with, when Ireally did think it would be otherwise! lol
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    )) well .. u`ll have frnds from tennis n football ..

    when i was a fresher had same probs .. but slowly it turned .. with class mates.. with flat mates .. we got along.. always the beginning is hard .. specially when there tones of ppl around.. u feel invisible and think that u`ll never to find a frnd or something ..

    if any of ur room mates r into sports specially football.. invite`em to a pub an watch games.. tho i`m a girl my room mates arent sports fan.. so that aint a solution for me =))
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    Feeling the same at the moment as well. I don't dislike my flatmates, they're all friendly, it's just when everyone's together, I'm hardly part of the group at the moment. Have sort of made 1 or 2 friends on my course but struggling to make any others. Freshers was really good and I talked to a lot people and had a good time but I didn't really properly click with anyone and it really does seem like everyone's made good friends already after a week and a half, just praying that it'll get better and hopefully I'll make some friends in societies or something.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    ^^^Exactly the same situation I am in atm. Everyone are so nice in my house, but the thing is I am like the complete opposite of them when in comes to a conversation, I just never fit in a word let alone a meaningful sentence. I guess I need to make more friends outside which as most people right now are more closer to their housemates.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    The above 2 comments are also exactly my situation too lol. Well almost, since it appears that they've been *****ing about me behind my back now =/
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    im worried about spiraling into depression due to lonelyness if this continues all because of randomness that the people i live with know people already and have friends and non of the societys avilable apeal to me university is really not what i expected i havent been out once at all at this rate il be the only person i know back home that has no friends and university
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by mud19)
    im staying in student accomodation been here for about a week now. The people in my flat are friendly enough although everyone seems to do there own thing and some of them know people here so they have been going out with those people. I had a few lectures and have spoken to other people but nothing yet my freshers week was very uneventfull its really is not what i expected at all
    See my thread on this. Head down, grin and bear it. Freshers is overrated. Forcing yourself to make friends with people you wouldn't care about if they weren't in the same Uni as you is social suicide.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    we should start a society regardin this =))
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by mud19)
    im staying in student accomodation been here for about a week now. The people in my flat are friendly enough although everyone seems to do there own thing and some of them know people here so they have been going out with those people. I had a few lectures and have spoken to other people but nothing yet my freshers week was very uneventfull its really is not what i expected at all

    I agree tbh.

    Out of us 5 girls, one does her own thing, 3 stay in their room all day and don't like to go to the Union, then there's me I am 'friends' with my next door lad neighbour though so thats okay.

    I struggle to talk to people in lectures too... well my Psychology lecture hall is so big and noone sits in the same place twice!

    Hopefully i will meet more people soon

    Good luck to you!
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    I feel freshers week is overated... :/ maybe i'm just feeling very emotional at the moment
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    I'm sort of in the same boat but I've made several sort-of friends. People who I sit next to in lectures, a girl I walk home with form a soc meeting, my flatmates and their friends who I've got to know. Basically I don't think they'll turn into proper close friends for a while but its good to surround yourself with a few people.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    4
    ReputationRep:
    nothing yet im bored and lonely
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    It all comes down to communication. If you are shy, you will find it MUCH more difficult to spontaneously communicate with strangers. As a result, you may find it more difficult to integrate with others. (or "fit in" so to speak.)

    Do not assume that other people don't like you. If they don't know you, there's no way they can realistically dislike you. Sure, they may assume that you're not very sociable or friendly, but this can be changed. People will disregard their assumptions if you prove them wrong.

    The only way to overcome it is to break down the mental barrier and make an extra effort to communicate with people. Be spontaneous, greet people, smile, make small talk and show an interest in others. If you are naturally quiet, make an extra effort to speak louder. (especially if you tend to be quieter while communicating with strangers) ALWAYS avoid one word answers to questions from others! Not doing so will make it very difficult for others to continue the flow of conversation.

    Unfortunately freshers week is not for everyone. Some people will want time to adapt to changes in their surroundings. They may be thinking about other things (such as family boyfriend/girlfriends or friends) Or, they may be apprehensive or anxious about other things. (such as starting a new course.) During this time, you may not feel like being Mr. Sociable and this is understandable even though it's not beneficial. There's still other opportunities to socialise and integrate with other people though.

    If you feel down about something, try and figure out what the exact cause of the problem is. Then ask yourself how you can overcome it. Then all you need to do, is put those thoughts into action. If you don't know what your problems are (with regards to social interaction and integration) it may be worth asking your family or friends. They should know you better than most and should be able to spot areas which can be improved. Just remember that the problem won't get better unless you do something about it. Unfortunately you're not going to get a complete stranger banging on your door in the middle of the night saying "HAI BUDDY. I LIKE YOU! LET'S BE BEST BUDS KKK?!!!" You really need to make an effort because true friendship doesn't happen overnight.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    If it's any consolation I haven't really made any friends either. I made a few friends online who'd I met on Facebook or UCAS's own social networking site (YouGoFurther) and we got on really well, but meeting them in real life was awkward and one of them is being kind of evasive with me now. I think he thinks I'm a bit weird. I'm much better at talking to people online! I'm so fed up, I haven't really got any friends here and if I thought my flatmates and I would be the best of friends, I couldn't be more wrong. I hope everyone feeling like this makes lots of friends before long.
 
 
 
Poll
Do you like carrot cake?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.