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Anyone had an abortion? watch

    • #1
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    #1

    Please keep anon!

    Hi, basically I found out yesterday that I'm pregnant. I've told my boyfriend and we've both agreed it's for the best if I have an abortion (I'm 18 and he's 19, we just feel we're too young and neither of us would be able to support a child).

    I'm roughly 7 weeks and I haven't been to the doctors yet but I'm planning to go on Friday.

    I was just wondering if anyone out there had been in the same situation and could tell me what it's like to have an abortion? Or just any general advice. I'm a bit nervous about the whole thing.

    Also, would a medical or surgical abortion be better? I'm veering towards a surgical under general anaesthetic, I really don't fancy watching my baby miscarry.

    Thanks in advance!!
    • #2
    #2

    Anon please.

    i had one a few months ago, knowing i was pregnant was the most stressful thing ever with my doctor suggesting things like 'you can take a year out from uni' and 'your parents will help you through this' i have never told m parents and never intend to.

    If you dont want it to be on your doctor's records id recommend phoning your hospital's clinic directly and make an appointment. (i was told that i should have done this afterwards!!)

    I dont know which one id recommend but after having a medical abortion i recovered really quickly although seeing the foetus miscarry filled me with overwhelming guilt and regret.

    Good luck with everything and dont let it get you down :-)
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    I haven't had one myself but I believe there is a cut-off time (somewhere between 8-12 weeks) before which you will be given a pill to induce miscarriage and after a surgical abortion. I'm sure the info will be on the NHS website somewhere, but I don't think you generally get a choice between the two.

    Good luck OP.

    Edit: they also give you a contraceptive injection afterwards (effective for 3 months)
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    I'm not a woman so I only have second-hand experience but it is a pretty psychologically traumatising experience and should not be done unless you are certain that you do not want a child yet. You might find yourself wanting to 'replace' the life that would have been with a baby, a doll or a pet.

    Having said that, I'm all for abortion; I absolutely hate kids.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anon please.

    i had one a few months ago, knowing i was pregnant was the most stressful thing ever with my doctor suggesting things like 'you can take a year out from uni' and 'your parents will help you through this' i have never told m parents and never intend to.

    If you dont want it to be on your doctor's records id recommend phoning your hospital's clinic directly and make an appointment. (i was told that i should have done this afterwards!!)

    I dont know which one id recommend but after having a medical abortion i recovered really quickly although seeing the foetus miscarry filled me with overwhelming guilt and regret.

    Good luck with everything and dont let it get you down :-)
    How can you contact the hospital clinic straight? Like where do you contact..?
    • #3
    #3

    Have you considered adoption instead? I had an abortion 5 years ago, and I really urge you not to. I have ruined my life - every day I wonder what my child would look like today, what they would be doing ... when their birthday would have been. It's a life, and why would you take that away? You've created a new person, please don't kill them. Your baby deserves the chance to live, and become the person he/she is destined to be.
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    PS Helper
    A friend of mine had a non-surgical abortion and it sounded pretty horrendous, but that was a good six or seven years ago so things might have changed. I would go for the surgical option as then it's done and over with. If you want an abortion, don't listen to all the crap about whether it's right or wrong - if you've made the decision then I doubt anything will change your mind and it will just make you feel worse. PM me if you want to talk and good luck
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Have you considered adoption instead? I had an abortion 5 years ago, and I really urge you not to. I have ruined my life - every day I wonder what my child would look like today, what they would be doing ... when their birthday would have been. It's a life, and why would you take that away? You've created a new person, please don't kill them. Your baby deserves the chance to live, and become the person he/she is destined to be.
    I'm sorry about your experience, but it's not really fair of you to come on here and try to guilt the OP out of a choice she has already made. Fine, tell her about your own regrets, but putting emotional pressure on her by calling the foetus a "baby" or "person" and going on about how it "deserves the chance to live", is just going to make things harder for her. You are (or clearly were) pro-choice, so why would you try to persuade her away from her own choice?
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    Welcome Squad
    (Original post by Jelkin)
    You are (or clearly were) pro-choice, so why would you try to persuade her away from her own choice?
    ...because they don't want this lass to make the same mistake they did. Stands to reason really why they've said what they've said, doesn't it?
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    well abortion is wrong unless the mothers life is at risk! i have heard of situations of women really regretting their decsions in having an abortion yes the OP has made a decsion but it is only wise to show her both sides of the coin

    maybe adopting it out to a family that always wanted a child but could not have one will be benificial for the child and yourself atleast you will know the child is in good hands rather than treating your baby as noting but a pair of cells the same cells you and your boyfriend once started off as give it some importance it still a potential life.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Sprockette)
    How can you contact the hospital clinic straight? Like where do you contact..?
    i think you would phone the hospital and then ask to be put through to the family planning clinic or whatever its called, where you could enquire about the abortion.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i think you would phone the hospital and then ask to be put through to the family planning clinic or whatever its called, where you could enquire about the abortion.
    Bear in mind that not all hospitals offer termination services, and some that do will not accept self-referrals, so it's probably worth doing some preliminary groundwork otherwise you could be in for some very fruitless phonecalls.
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    i have! PM me for details. it was a medical one btw.

    sorry i just realised you might not want to do that. but i have helped other girls on TSR providing them information about my experience and it is easier to chat over msn or something. but if you don't want to PM me, just quote me and i will tell you details on this thread.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Have you considered adoption instead? I had an abortion 5 years ago, and I really urge you not to. I have ruined my life - every day I wonder what my child would look like today, what they would be doing ... when their birthday would have been. It's a life, and why would you take that away? You've created a new person, please don't kill them. Your baby deserves the chance to live, and become the person he/she is destined to be.
    well everyone thinks that sort of stuff if they have an abortion, it's not necessarily going to ruin their life. for me i think "wow i would not be at this party drinking these jagerbombs right now if i had a kid..." or a more sensible thing "i would not be at college learning this cool stuff with my mates"
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Hey guys, thanks so much for all your opinions. I'm going to go to the doctors tomorrow and see what he has to say.

    Oh, and you can f*** right off with the emotional blackmail! I've made my decision and I just wanted some first hand accounts from other girls who have done the same thing. This is what is right for me. It wouldn't be fair for me to bring a baby into the world in my situation. It would have a terribl quality of life!

    I've really appreciated all the genuine help though! I can't begin to thank you!
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    (Original post by lollypop*)
    well I BELIEVE abortion is wrong unless the mothers life is at risk! i have heard of situations of women really regretting their decsions in having an abortion yes the OP has made a decsion but it is only wise to show her both sides of the coin

    maybe adopting it out to a family that always wanted a child but could not have one will be benificial for the child and yourself atleast you will know the child is in good hands rather than treating your baby as noting but a pair of cells the same cells you and your boyfriend once started off as give it some importance it still a potential life.
    Fixed.
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    Hey OP, I have had one before. It wasn't easy as a process and it wasn't an easy decision but it was for the best, I was too young to had a kid at the time.
    A kid having a kid rarely turns out alright.

    Perhaps in ten years you will look back and agree it was the right choice.

    Whatever happens best of luck!
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    (Original post by lollypop*)
    well abortion is wrong unless the mothers life is at risk!

    :rolleyes:

    There are so many things wrong with the sentence. So many circumstances where it is COMPLETELY beneficial for the lump of cells to be terminated.

    People who claim abortion is wrong haven't got a leg to stand on. I'm sorry, and whilst everyone has their opinions, this is completely ridiculous and it genuinely amazes me how in this day and age, people can stand up and say 'Abortion is wrong'.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    Oh, and you can f*** right off with the emotional blackmail! I've made my decision and I just wanted some first hand accounts from other girls who have done the same thing.


    Calm down, she's only tryna help. You asked for advice, you're hardly gonna hear everything u wanna hear.
    • #4
    #4

    Hi,

    Please don't judge me on this but I've had two, the first was a medical abortion and it was awful, it was painful and distressing. I had a really bad experience, it was pretty horrendous.

    The second time I had a surgical abortion and it was so much better... I was put under anaesthetic and when I woke up I felt like nothing had happened, there wasn't any pain and an hour and a half later I was walking out of the hospital. Honestly I couldn't praise surgical abortion enough compared to medical abortion but everyone is different and you have to chose what's best for you. I hope everything goes okay xx
 
 
 
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