Ok so I'm relatively new to the whole dating/"courting" thing. I've usually just ended up with guys because i've met them at uni/spent time with them and so I've never really been through the whole formal and attempting to get to know someone slowly.
I met up with a guy the other day for casual drink because we met on campus briefly earlier in the year and carried on texting eachother/talking online. Due to the setting not sure if it was really classed as a first date. I wasn't too sure about him - it seems we're pretty different in that I like to go out and enjoy going for sociable drinks with friends. He seems to be far more into discussing academic topics and he doesn't drink at all because he doesn't really like to get tipsy or drunk anymore. This is not a HUGE problem for me but it would be nice to be with someone who you could have fun nights out with. Plus I'm not really the type of girl to enjoy discussing political affairs after an intense day in lectures. I'm a pretty easy going character.
Anyway, we've arranged to go out for a meal next week. So this will definitely be a more formal setting and a proper date. I've agreed to see if it's any different and give him more of a chance. But I'm slightly worried that i'll have been stringing him along if I decide he's not for me after this meal - due to the amount of time we've been texting and have been for drinks and now a meal.
Would you be offended/confused if a girl just decided she didn't want to carry on going for meals and didn't want to take it further? I'm not even sure how I'd explain myself if i did decide after the meal out that he just wasn't for me! I also don't know whether a first kiss is expected after a second (potential) date??
Aargh I'm really not a mean person but it seems I can't help but be in these situations. I'm not really one to settle and I'm quite picky when it comes to things like this!
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- Thread Starter
- 30-09-2010 15:15
- 30-09-2010 15:26
I think that's fair enough, as long as you give him a proper explanation. The frustrating thing is when a girl just stops talking to you.
If you just explain to him that you're very different people and you don't think a relationship would work, you've done right by him & he can't really complain at that.
Edit: Out of curiosity, how did you two get talking in the first place?
- 30-09-2010 15:28
I'm not an expert, but, it seems like the likelihood of you actually liking him after going to dinner with him is pretty low. If that is the case, I, personally, would call it off because otherwise you're just experimenting and it involves his feelings.
However if you feel like there is some chance you might like him, jump in and deal with the consequences afterwards...you regret what you don't do, more than what you do do !