The Student Room Group

Feel on verge of breakdown with boyfriend..

Hi there, I don't even know why I am posting really. I feel like I am on the verge of a breakdown and don't know where to go. My boyfriend of 4 years is driving me up the wall. I feel like he just doesn't love me and is using me for my hospitality.
We moved in together in May and ever since everything has been a real battle (paying bills, helping out around the place). I feel like I am in a relationship with myself and actually feel very lonely. I left my hometown of 100 miles away behind to be with him, and although I have friends, it is him I come home to and he that makes me feel empty.
He is lazy, arrogant and disorganised beyond comprehension. For instance, his car broke down 4 weeks ago and I let him use my brand new car without him ever really thanking me, when I put a stop to it because he was disrespecting it, he then kept begging to use it (even though he has thousands saved up in the bank), he would then hound me to drop him off and pick him up from work. This morning he slammed all of the doors and said he would not talk to me again because I said no. He then said if I wasn't dropping him to work, would I iron his shirt? When I said no, as I am sick of doing things for him, he just slams about/shouts and sulks.
Last night he wanted a drink so I had to get it for him and I took a glass fresh out of the dishwasher but it must have had marks on it still as when I gave it to him he said 'I just can't STAND lazy people'! Even though he never ever cleans anything, his clothes have never organised from the start and he leaves yoghurt pots and crap all over the place.
But worse, since I got here he is always trying to push me away/to go away for the weekend. The other weekend I spent the entire weekend helping a friend and was gone all weekend. But the next weekend when his mate was round he kept saying to me 'go out and get some girl friends' and 'why don't you go here and do this' when I just wanted to chill. When his mate came around the time before I made sure I was out to give them some space. It's like I can't do right for wrong.
His arrogance really puts me off and he is forever trying to show me up in front of his parents or just to be indirectly nasty to me.
He also has an obsession with money, stocks and shares but is the most tighest person ever. He used half of my expensive moisturiser and when I asked him to go halves on a new one for me, flat out refused. That's how he is with everything. A bit of a user I can see now.
I told him I was walking out and his only reply was 'Good bye!' over e-mail.
:rolleyes: :o: I am stuck in London with not that much money and a job where I work from home. To leave would be a massive bloody inconvenience but I am forever a misery with him.
Reply 1
Leave him, he sounds like a dick head. Inject a bit of reality into his life about how much he depends on you and uses you.
I'm almost sure you've posted numerous topics about this before. It makes me sad to think that you still have such little self esteem that you would stay with this person. I don't really know what you expect people to say anymore, because it seems you will put up with a hell of a lot of ****, so only you can decide when enough is enough.
Reply 3
Please leave him. No one deserves to be treated the way you are.
Why are you with him? Leave him. He shouldn't be treating you this way, can't you stay with friends while you sort yourself out? Whatever you do, don't stay with him and remember this isn't going to get any better unless you do something about it.
Reply 5
Just dump him, he's a big child. Trust me, I know, my dad is one. I feel sorry for my mum.
WHat the hell... why are you still going out with this moron?
Reply 7
Anonymous
Hi there, I don't even know why I am posting really. I feel like I am on the verge of a breakdown and don't know where to go. My boyfriend of 4 years is driving me up the wall. I feel like he just doesn't love me and is using me for my hospitality.
We moved in together in May and ever since everything has been a real battle (paying bills, helping out around the place). I feel like I am in a relationship with myself and actually feel very lonely. I left my hometown of 100 miles away behind to be with him, and although I have friends, it is him I come home to and he that makes me feel empty.
He is lazy, arrogant and disorganised beyond comprehension. For instance, his car broke down 4 weeks ago and I let him use my brand new car without him ever really thanking me, when I put a stop to it because he was disrespecting it, he then kept begging to use it (even though he has thousands saved up in the bank), he would then hound me to drop him off and pick him up from work. This morning he slammed all of the doors and said he would not talk to me again because I said no. He then said if I wasn't dropping him to work, would I iron his shirt? When I said no, as I am sick of doing things for him, he just slams about/shouts and sulks.
Last night he wanted a drink so I had to get it for him and I took a glass fresh out of the dishwasher but it must have had marks on it still as when I gave it to him he said 'I just can't STAND lazy people'! Even though he never ever cleans anything, his clothes have never organised from the start and he leaves yoghurt pots and crap all over the place.
But worse, since I got here he is always trying to push me away/to go away for the weekend. The other weekend I spent the entire weekend helping a friend and was gone all weekend. But the next weekend when his mate was round he kept saying to me 'go out and get some girl friends' and 'why don't you go here and do this' when I just wanted to chill. When his mate came around the time before I made sure I was out to give them some space. It's like I can't do right for wrong.
His arrogance really puts me off and he is forever trying to show me up in front of his parents or just to be indirectly nasty to me.
He also has an obsession with money, stocks and shares but is the most tighest person ever. He used half of my expensive moisturiser and when I asked him to go halves on a new one for me, flat out refused. That's how he is with everything. A bit of a user I can see now.
I told him I was walking out and his only reply was 'Good bye!' over e-mail.
:rolleyes: :o: I am stuck in London with not that much money and a job where I work from home. To leave would be a massive bloody inconvenience but I am forever a misery with him.


The two emoticons near the end of your post make it seem like you're almost apologetic that you are saying this, and makes me think that you will keep letting him walk all over you. Give him an ultimatum, if in say 2-4 weeks he hasn't improved walk out. He sounds like a giant douche and i think you know it too but have such low self worth that you're willing to put up with it.

My opinion anyway, good luck.
Reply 8
dita_parlo
I'm almost sure you've posted numerous topics about this before. It makes me sad to think that you still have such little self esteem that you would stay with this person. I don't really know what you expect people to say anymore, because it seems you will put up with a hell of a lot of ****, so only you can decide when enough is enough.



THIS.