Am i being stupid?

basically ive been in uni for just over 2 weeks (having a fantastic time btw),....anways ive sort of kissed quite a few people since ive been here... nothing serious just a bit of fun. but theres one lad who i really like, i met him on my first day and we get on great and have a laugh. he came up to me at the union and we had a bit of a kiss and a cuddle... then i saw him the next day, and the day after that etc just hanging out and generally having a good time.... we held hands and that sort of thing. but the other night i walked into a club to see him all over another girl. i wasnt upset thou... just felt a bit let down and all my friends told be to forget him.... but he phoned the next day and we decided to be friends, as i think he is such a great guy. however the next night we both ended upat the same club... he saw me with another guy and he went off in a mood! i couldnt believe it! anyway we talked and both agreeed that we really like each other but dnt want a relationship yet as it is tooo soon, and then came up with the idea that were in an "open relationship" ... something i swore i would never ever do. but im not sure if im doing the right thing. il probably end up gettin my heart broken by him.... ive only just got over my last serious relationship which ended badly about a year ago. what do u guys think i should do? should i continue seeing this guy just as mates (although we always end up kissing and cuddlin... and probably more preety soon) or should i just leave it for a while and see what happens?

Reply 1

RobbieC

I think if you are scared of having your heart broken, you are too into him to have an open relationship. And I don't think either of you are really prepared for the stresses that could entail on you. If you want to have a relationship, you are going to have to suggest friendship, and then if that feels weird, or if you feel ready for a plunge then a proper exclusive relationship. I think in this case, the latter seems more appropriate...

Reply 2

fleur-de-lis

Hmm, quite possible that he doesn't want you to flirt with others while he could do what he pleased. Plus, he was probably doing to the other girl what he was doing with you... I personally find all this kissing and cuddling of random people to be hilarious, I mean, if someone random does it, it is possible that they might do it to others too. Anyway, my advice would be to see him strictly as a friend (and that means, no physical stuffs), and since you have just broken up with someone else, just think about whether you want to go through more heartache when you are vulnerable.

Reply 3

viviki

If you can deal with a casual thing then fine but if you know you're going to end up wanting more why put yourself through the heartache?

Reply 4

DewyButtercup

personally, I think open relationships are impossible because human emotions just dont work like that . . . you can't be involved with someone and not care about them at the same time. just my opinion!

Reply 5

silverbolt

your using him,
you dont want a relationship but you keep him hanging stealing the odd kiss and a shag cos you know you can always fall back to him and because you know he will be there.
Male or female there is nothing wrong with being a player but dont play with those who have feelings for you or vice versa because that is wrong and where people get hurt.