The Student Room Group

How do I get better [missing boyfriend]

Hiya, i'm with my boyfriend and we have been going out for about 10 months, just started uni and we agreed to see each other every 2 weeks but I can't seem to go that long without seeing him! i'm fine not seeing mates and family for that time but i miss bf loads :rolleyes: i wanna be able to cope only seeing him every 2 weeks coz at the moment its not fair making him come and see me or me see him when he needs a rest from work :smile: im so pathetic i know. i try to keep busy and hang with mates but i still hate the idea of seeing him onlyu every couple weeks.
it sounds like you are thinking too much about missing him and not actually missing him as much as you would. i did that and i got really upset. but look forward to the next time instead of wishing it was like it all the time. sounds like you want it to work so it will. plus you can make twice the amount of uni friends and have twice as much fun if you visit each other. it is quite positive but never loose sight of him or seeing him because you are concentrating on how much you miss him...
Reply 2
I'm in pretty much the same situation with my boyfriend...10 months and everything. We haven't seen each other for 3 weeks now, but having been phoning every day. Try to focus on enjoying your time at Uni, and the time in between seeing him won't feel so long.
I suggest you appreciate the fact you have him in your life at all, cherish every moment and dread the day you part for good.
just get on with your lives, enjoy your new friends, and speak to him every day on the fone. Talking really helps, and set aside half hour a day for it and you will just really look forward to seeing him instead of missing him so much. iv seen my boyfriend like pretty much all day every day for the past 3 yrs n 2 months, were coping ok seeing each other every 4 weeks, tho i do miss him, but u can tthink about it too much!
Reply 5
I am in the same boat as you, my fiance is up in Nottingham and I am down in Kent, so we do not get to see each other very often, probably not even once every 2 weeks at present (because money is tight). I make do talking to Juno on the web or phone as much as I can, almost always every day (especially when phoning).
oh, I understand you so so much, I have the same situation, my Bf just left yesterday and we are going to meet in 2 weeks and a half, and I am already going mad,just MAD, wthout him...it is so hard, I am trying to keep myself busy as well, like studying and stuff but it doesnt help...You know what I did? i put a special big calendar just upper my bad with those 17 days that are between us and every evening I put a cross on a day, that had finished. It gives me a smile and makes me feel closer to that day when i am going to meet my BF. Try to do it...but i know how hard it is for you, keep strong and in the meantime try to think about some surprise for him =)
CherryGarcia
oh, I understand you so so much, I have the same situation, my Bf just left yesterday and we are going to meet in 2 weeks and a half, and I am already going mad,just MAD, wthout him...it is so hard, I am trying to keep myself busy as well, like studying and stuff but it doesnt help...You know what I did? i put a special big calendar just upper my bad with those 17 days that are between us and every evening I put a cross on a day, that had finished. It gives me a smile and makes me feel closer to that day when i am going to meet my BF. Try to do it...but i know how hard it is for you, keep strong and in the meantime try to think about some surprise for him =)


Thats a really groovy idea thanks :biggrin:
I was in that kind of situation in the summer, my boyfriend and I were apart for 9 weeks (I went to New Zealand and he went to America, and the trips overlapped) - I was virtually insane by the end of the 9 weeks. :eek: Truly the hardest thing I've ever had to endure. :frown: Luckily I was travelling so it helped to keep my mind off things slightly.... although this made it harder to talk on the phone as we were so far apart!

You must keep yourself busy, and the time will fly past. You will get used to not seeing him every day and the pain will ease off - I promise! As others said, talk on the phone every day and keep him in your thoughts. And when you do see him, it'll be even more special! :smile:

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. :smile:
Reply 9
But don't live your life around waiting for him to return. That's one sad way to waste your years. Look forward to it by all means, but don't make it the only thing you think about.
im at uni with my boyfriend and whilst it is GREAT seeing him all the time, it has its complications.
he has made his friends and i have made mine. i want to see him. i also want to see my friends. he wants to see his friends. he also wants to see me.
somewhere or other we always end up making a compromise.
just because we are at the same uni doesnt also mean that we see each other every day. sometimes i will go for a few days without seeing him and miss him and then when we do meet up i miss my friends doing something which makes them closer and leaves me out.
what i say is - cherish the time that you have with your boyfriend BUT also appreciate the fact that you have the space to meet new people and spend time with those people and get to know them and things. be happy that you are living uni life for yourself and without compromise. you get to do exactly what you want - it is all about you. celebrate yourself!
Reply 11
One way to get over it is to think of other people who only see each other once every 4 months :frown:

I only get to see my girlfriend during the holidays, probably for a week at a time (maybe more in summer)
I'm in the same situation, my boyfriend went to uni 3 weeks ago, and I see him every weekend. Going from seeing him everyday to once a week was very hard, and though I miss him tremendously it is getting slightly easier, or just that I'm getting use to him being away. We speak on the phone up to 3 times a day, text regually(sp) and occasionaly speak on the web. This helps a lot, as I always know what he's doing, who he's with and he knows the same about me, so it feels like he isn't as far away as he is.

Instead of going...oh its x days till i see him :frown: think, oooo it's only x days till I see him! :smile:

Take your mind off it by doing work, if you have a part time job ask for extra shifts, do some coursework, re-read notes etc etc.

I'm not saying it's easy, me and my boyfriend have had a few arguments since he's been away, but only because the dynamic of our relationship has changed, everything has slightly shifted and we just need to get use to it.

Just work through it, it'll be fine. And like the guy above me (Oziris) has said, think of the people who don't see their other half for ages. My friend Ed, his girlfriend has gone to New Zealand for 5 months. As he always reminds me whenever I moan about not seeing my boyfriend. :p:
I've been with my boyfriend for almost three years, and now I've just gone into my 2nd year at uni. Believe me the first year is the worst- we were all over the place, almost split up etc etc. We've realised how much we care for each other now, and see each other almost every weekend. I think the most important part is still to make the most of uni, it's very easy to concentrate on your boyfriend and forget about meeting people and joining clubs etc. My advice is to get your boyfriend in with your mates so that he doesn't become a separate 'thing' to uni if you know what I mean.
Most of all enjoy yourself at uni, make the most of having a great boyfriend, GOOD LUCK!
i cant believe u lot see each other every week. How do you manage it! i see him every 3 or 4 weeks :frown: