My girlfriend slow danced with another guy and let him feel her up.. Help!

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.Ali.

I suppose, in the end, it comes down to a conflict of opinions. If we keep this up we'll just go round is circles, so I'll agree to disagree.
Sorry for calling you a slut, btw, there was no need to be rude. Maybe cut down on the willy teasing, though :wink:

Yep, deveryone has different opinions I guess. Oh and it's okay aha. :tongue:

Reply 81

Annonymous_47

Original post by Its A Catch 22

The way you had described yourself made it sound as if you were promiscuous, thus slutty. If you say you're not, I have no problem with believing you and dropping that. Also, I don't use double standards, boys who do it are just as wrong. It's not cool, relationship, or not.

It's not paranoid or insecure to want someone whom you love to be intimate in that way with only you. I don't doubt that the OP knows she did it harmlessly, what I am objecting to is the fact she didn't consider it to be wrong whilst in a relationship. Grinding in a club is something that is perfectly fine, just so long as you're single.

This exactly. Would you mind if I married you please?

Reply 82

UKguy29

Original post by Anonymous

So yeah...

Just woke up this morning to pictures of my girlfriend on a night out last night.. Before going she made sure I trusted her by saying "You're not worried are you?" And at that point I wasn't worried at all....
However, I woke up this morning to find pictures on Facebook of her slow dancing with another guy.. She says "I didn't actually do anything..."

How the hell do I react to this? =/

Hi

I'd have serious trust issues with a woman that let a drunk bloke dance up close and personal in a club. Considering every guy knows what the bloke was thinking / hoping for, I think its completely disrespectful. Talk to her, let her know it really bothers you. If she fails to correct her behaviour or you find her doing it again, personally i wouldn't want to be with her.

Reply 83

PrimateJ

Original post by .Ali.

Because I found several flaws in your theory?

And how am I a skank? You're rather childish. :rolleyes:

The point about projection went over your head, because it nullified all the "flaws" you thought you were pointing out. Hint: not every double standard is unfair or arbitrary.

Reply 84

Its A Catch 22

Original post by Annonymous_47

This exactly. Would you mind if I married you please?

You flatter me. :wink:

Reply 85

RainGirlxxx

Hey,
To me, her response seems pretty genuine, her intentions seem good. But she's not my girlfriend, you'll have a better idea of that. Though you need to have a chat about the 'not being able to say no thing' - that could cause some trust issues between you! You both need to know where you stand in terms of what you can and what you can't do in your relationship.
Also, no disrespect but I think her excuse is invalid. If a guy is confident enough to ask a girl to dance with him, he's big enough to handle rejection. And not only that, it's not even rejection, all she had to say was 'Thanks but I have a girl/boyfriend :smile:

'

All the best! :smile:

Reply 86

Oh my Ms. Coffey

Original post by .Ali.

It's dancing. Yes, it's sexy dancing, but most likely meaningless. You should trust her to know she wouldn't do anything.

I flirt all the time, sit on guys knees, put my arms around them, etc - doesn't mean I'm interested in any way. So yeah, most likely meaningless.

do you do that with girls?

Reply 87

Traceur

Original post by Anonymous

Her only excuse for doing it and not rejecting him is that she has a problem saying no to people.. Because she feels bad for them? o.O If she did run off and go home straight away after it happened.. Am i over-reacting by being hurt by it? =/

Haha! Thats the excuse girls use when they want to be a little slaggy but dont want to admit it. :biggrin:

Reply 88

Annonymous_47

Original post by Traceur

Haha! Thats the excuse girls use when they want to be a little slaggy but dont want to admit it. :biggrin:

To be honest, this is true about most girls who say that. After all, how hard is it to say 'no'? Your girlfriend should surely be more concerned for her boyfriend's feelings than those of the random guy who tried to grope her...

Reply 89

xnatalie01x

I'd give her the benefit of the doubt this one time- maybe he was really just persistent and she didn't want to say no. I'm like that I hate hurting other people's feelings. Tell her it bothers you, but if I was you I'd personally overlook it.

Reply 90

BeanofJelly

Original post by Anonymous

Thanks for all the replies...

She described it as "Some guy randomly came up to me and attatched himself to me" she also says that he kept trying to kiss her and she was turning away everytime.. And after a minute tops she ran away and came home..

What's not adequate about that explanation? I don't really understand :s-smilie:

It's not as though pictures can't be misleading.

TBH, without seeing the pictures, and without knowing you or your girlfriend, this situation could range anything from:

Your girlfriend was approached by some random who started to dance with her. There was no grinding, it's just that your definition is "slow dancing" is any male and female in relatively close physical proximity facing one another. You say she "let him feel her up", perhaps because he did try a sly boob grab and someone took a picture at that moment, or maybe you're just wildly exaggerating because your idea of "feeling up" is perhaps putting an arm around her waist or holding her arm. Things perhaps she didn't like and tried to stop him doing, but aren't quite worth storming off or slapping for, eh? After about a minute of this she got sick of him and left. You're just neurotic.

to..

Your girlfriend was rubbing her pubic regions/arse on some random dude for a lengthy period of time. Photos evident this clearly, as well as him having his hands all over her with obvious consent on her part. Her excuses are weak when you regard the photographic evidence.

It's my personal suspicion that your title is a little misleading, when it comes to looking at what you've actually said on the thread... but ultimately:

WE JUST DON'T KNOW OP WE JUST DON'T KNOW

Maybe you should just cover all of the options: Tell her off, dump her, forgive her, seek counselling, just have sex, get an STD test, forget about it, talk about it?