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Help! I can't talk to him anymore :( Watch

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    Hi everyone,

    I have been going through quite a difficult period in a relationship where contact time had to be minimised due to work. At one point, I was developing feelings for another due to the fact that I was spending a considerable amount of time with this person rather than my bf. I also realised that this person was abusing the trust I had placed in him and latched onto the fact that I was vulnerable. Therefore, I have also steered clear of him now. My bf is under a lot of pressure and I understand and support this by giving him the space he wants. However, he only wants to talk when it suits him. I am actually hurting a lot not so much by the reduced contact time, but more to do with the selfish personality trait. It has got to the point where I am so hurt that I no longer can speak to him. Therefore, I do not answer calls. (Only he can call me when he wants to and there is no contact throughout the day). I also do not feel involved with his life any longer so it is hard to talk at the end of the day where you feel as though you have to 'start from scratch'. The longer I am mute for, I know the more damage to the relationship it will cause. However, I just can't speak? I can't bare to hear the gentle voice of somebody who has the ability to cause me pain and hurt.

    There is also the phrase, 'Communication is the key to successful relationships. If there is no communication, there is no relationship..'

    Help!
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      Tell him how you feel. Do you really want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't talk to you?
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      whats wrong with him only wanting to talk when it suits him? you don seem to be understanding him... fair enough he should try to make some effort but if u don answer his calls how can u expect to get anything sorted?
      • #1
      • Thread Starter
      #1

      (Original post by petey peterson 77)
      whats wrong with him only wanting to talk when it suits him? you don seem to be understanding him... fair enough he should try to make some effort but if u don answer his calls how can u expect to get anything sorted?
      Because a relationship is about the needs of two people, not one. With him talking to me only when it suits me, it clearly isn't working and there is a problem. But I cannot speak to him about this, as I know that I will be accused of not understanding or being supportive. Therefore, I suppress my needs, do not tell him how I feel and the problem has just snowballed to the effect of not being to talk AT ALL now. When I do not speak to him, he tells me that he is lonely? I just feel that I am going back and forth and is there even a solution to this?
     
     
     
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