Ok, im not even sure if this belongs in the health section, but its definitely not a sexual health problem so this is where its going. Sorry if this displeases anybody =/.
Anyway, ive known this girl for like 7 months, and i like her ALOT, as in i cant stop thinking about her, and she is a girl who is kinda middle class, as she went to a grammar school and her dad is a doctor, however her mum and dad split up and she just lives with her mum now. However her mother is a heavy drinker and this girl has to do basically everything around the house and has to clean up her mum's sick, help her to the toilet, clean up after the toilet etc. Becuase of this, she is also very closed off about her real feelings and will rarely let anyone into her life as she is embarassed. I am not bothered as my mother is a heavy drinker also, but not as severe. She is also used ot being spoilt a bit, as her dad is a doctor who is like any other father who has 2 daughters(i would be the same if i had 2 daughters to be honest). I am a working class lad, whose parents dont earn alot, and ive never been spoilt.
This girl is also the sorta girl who, (im my opinion), thinks she wants a big cute guy to come and sweep her off her feet, whereas (again in my opinion) she just wants a guy who will love her and care for her when all her personal issues get too much (as they have done before). This girl is also the sorta girl who hasnt had many relationships due to her circumstances, but she likes the attention of lots of guys, like flirting and stuf, but will never take it any further, and if she has tried, the guys just end up being pricks and sending her messages saying they wanna **** her and stuff. I am kinda the same as her, ive never been very confident with girls, and havnt even had a proper relationship, but i really like her alot.
I told her i liked her and she told me that she "used to" like me, therefore giving me the idea that if she liked me once she can like me again. Anyway, one night she got a little drunk (which is when she actually lets her feelings out and expresses her emotions properly, as she never does it when sober as she thinks it makes her look weak), and invited me over to talk to her for a bit. She also told me in a text that becuase she thought i wasnt going over at the time that "i guess you've passed up your chance with me now ): you obvs didnt like me that much grr". I did what i thought any lad would do and went over for a while and i wanted to kiss her all night, but couldnt get up the confidence, and i didnt know if she really did like me, so i got a hug and a kiss on the cheek when i left. Then a few days later she told me that she only invited me over as a friend despite the text she sent me. Then, a few days after that we were texting, and i told her that i wanted to kiss her but didnt know whether she liked me, and she said that she would of let me kiss her becuase i deserved it. I was very confused at this point, becuase i didnt think girls just let lads kiss them becuase "they deserved it" and in the same night she told me while she was sober that she wasnt attracted to me "romantically". And just to kick me where it hurts, she told me that she would have let me kiss her becuase she knew that it would mean something to me and nothing to her, and she would kiss me becuase she thinks it would mean something to me or make me happy perhaps?. Which seems very insensitive to me.
Basically i wanted to know whether i am being too stupid and over thinking it all and she doesnt actually like me, or am i just needing to man up and just kiss her and see how she reacts, even though she said it would mean nothing to her.
cONSTUCTIVE CRITISISM OR ADVICE IS VERY MUCH APPRECIATED.
Im confused as to whether she likes me or not Watch
- Thread Starter
- 29-11-2010 23:05
- 30-11-2010 04:10
Whoa, no wonder you're confused. It sounds like she might have some feelings for you but is such a closed person she'd never admit to anyone, including herself. To me it seems as if she doesn't know what she is doing.
If you were to make a move you'd have to be very straightforward and confident, like just kiss her next time you get even the slightest chance. From reading what you wrote she doesn't seem like the sort of person who you'd be able to have a long conversion about your feeling or flirt gently with, doing so gives her time to change her mind (which is doing a lot by the sounds of it!). You'll never be able to get an answer for certain from a person like that, trying is the only way you'll ever find out.