Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

My lack of relationships and desire for a relationship. Watch

    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    So basically I'm a 17 year old guy in my last year of school who has never been in a relationship, or even gone out on a date with a girl. I know many of you will sat "that's not too bad you have plenty of time" etc and I totally understand and get what you're saying, but it doesn't really change how I feel

    I see nice girls about the place who are really nice to me and stuff but I never seem to get to know them outside of school or anything. I see lots of nice girls on Facebook, having fun in the pictures and generally just having fun, recently people being stupid and having fun in the snow. But I'm not really like that, I've never been invited anywhere with a group of friends and I don't think I'm a terribly "fun" person, I always seem to be perceived as the serious one, and I do realise I can come across that way.

    This seems to stop me getting to know any girls properly, to the point that if I'm sitting next to a girl in class and she's nice to me I start thinking about her in "that" way. I can't help it, I think I must be desperate or something, but I just really want a relationship.

    I know a lot of you will see this as "guy wants some girl action" but it really isn't. I don't want a relationship for anything like that yet, I just want to have a girl who really cares about me, who I can go out and have fun with and have a great time. I'm not really interested in sex and stuff yet, I just want to be able to have someone to be really nice to me and who I can go out, have fun, maybe hold hands and share some hugs with, but it doesn't seem to be happening for me. I'm thinking maybe I should just wait until I start university next year so I can get a fresh start, but I'm applying for Maths which I know is a very male dominated field so I don't know.

    Well so basically I want to be able to join in the silly fun people can have, and get a girlfriend in which to share my life, and to be honest I don't know why I'm making this thread, maybe you guys are in the same position and can share your experiences and give advice?

    Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read that and reply
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Christ, grow up
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Snaiv)
    Christ, grow up
    I'm plenty grown up - if I wasn't I'd just want to go out, get drunk and shag - which isn't what I want to do. I feel your comment was unnecessarily harsh, all I want is a meaningful relationship with someone special, is that really too much to ask?
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Bananas01)
    So basically I'm a 17 year old guy in my last year of school who has never been in a relationship, or even gone out on a date with a girl. I know many of you will sat "that's not too bad you have plenty of time" etc and I totally understand and get what you're saying, but it doesn't really change how I feel

    I see nice girls about the place who are really nice to me and stuff but I never seem to get to know them outside of school or anything. I see lots of nice girls on Facebook, having fun in the pictures and generally just having fun, recently people being stupid and having fun in the snow. But I'm not really like that, I've never been invited anywhere with a group of friends and I don't think I'm a terribly "fun" person, I always seem to be perceived as the serious one, and I do realise I can come across that way.

    This seems to stop me getting to know any girls properly, to the point that if I'm sitting next to a girl in class and she's nice to me I start thinking about her in "that" way. I can't help it, I think I must be desperate or something, but I just really want a relationship.

    I know a lot of you will see this as "guy wants some girl action" but it really isn't. I don't want a relationship for anything like that yet, I just want to have a girl who really cares about me, who I can go out and have fun with and have a great time. I'm not really interested in sex and stuff yet, I just want to be able to have someone to be really nice to me and who I can go out, have fun, maybe hold hands and share some hugs with, but it doesn't seem to be happening for me. I'm thinking maybe I should just wait until I start university next year so I can get a fresh start, but I'm applying for Maths which I know is a very male dominated field so I don't know.

    Well so basically I want to be able to join in the silly fun people can have, and get a girlfriend in which to share my life, and to be honest I don't know why I'm making this thread, maybe you guys are in the same position and can share your experiences and give advice?

    Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read that and reply

    Invite yourself out with some friends, and get ****-faced. Repeat as needed until you've managed to break out of your bubble and socialise.

    You'll find it much easier to chat to girls.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Studentus-anonymous)
    Invite yourself out with some friends, and get ****-faced. Repeat as needed until you've managed to break out of your bubble and socialise.

    You'll find it much easier to chat to girls.
    I understand what you're saying, but I dunno. What i want is a meaningful relationship - maybe I'm just being a naive insatiable romantic but I really want to share my life with a nice girl
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Bananas01)
    I'm plenty grown up - if I wasn't I'd just want to go out, get drunk and shag - which isn't what I want to do. I feel your comment was unnecessarily harsh, all I want is a meaningful relationship with someone special, is that really too much to ask?
    You're 17, stop acting like a spinster, you're not 'deep' or 'mature' like you seem to think you are, you're too young to fall in love, just go out and have fun.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Snaiv)
    You're 17, stop acting like a spinster, you're not 'deep' or 'mature' like you seem to think you are, you're too young to fall in love, just go out and have fun.
    I know, that's the problem - I can't seem to go out and have fun or fall in love. And to be honest I can't really help how I feel can I?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    As I read your post I imagined you wearing a top hat, sitting in a library, sipping tea and eating scones as a goose made of caviare flies over your mansion in the 1970's.

    Get up. Get off of TSR. Go talk to people in school or w.e it is that you do. Then when you find someone who replies when you talk at them try something along the lines of "Hey... Fancy going to see a film?" It's not difficult! If you know you give off a super serious impression then just stop being so bloody super srs bsns!

    If that doesn't work. Internet dating. (Y)
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Bananas01)
    I know, that's the problem - I can't seem to go out and have fun or fall in love. And to be honest I can't really help how I feel can I?
    Grrrrrrrr, you're a joke
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    You can't make other people change (i.e. make someone fall for you); however, if you feel like you want to be a more fun person then become a more fun person.

    Everyone always really knows what they need to do in these situation (suck up your pride and ask if you can tag along with people etc) but are always nervous of what people are going to think of them. Life only happens once, so don't hesitate, once it's over it doesn't matter what people thought of you.


    As for the "I'm plenty grown up" comment, that is always the most ironic things I ever hear people say. No one should ever think they are 'grown up'. On the rare occasions that people have told me that I seem mature, they just get told that they haven't seen me once I've had sugar - speaking of immaturity, why am I inside when there is snow outside? SNOW!
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Joe Weavurrr)
    As I read your post I imagined you wearing a top hat, sitting in a library, sipping tea and eating scones as a goose made of caviare flies over your mansion in the 1970's.

    Get up. Get off of TSR. Go talk to people in school or w.e it is that you do. Then when you find someone who replies when you talk at them try something along the lines of "Hey... Fancy going to see a film?" It's not difficult! If you know you give off a super serious impression then just stop being so bloody super srs bsns!

    If that doesn't work. Internet dating. (Y)
    Sorry to be off topic, but what does "bsns" mean?

    And yeah, OP does seem kinda old fashioned.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    You just need to get yourself out there fella. Stop specifically looking for a relationship but look to socialise/spend time outside school and your home. Maybe get a job so that you have to interact with other people more often. If you're not happy with your friends not inviting you out then have a word. Also, if there are girls in your school and you feel attracted to them then surely the only thing left to do is ask them out on a date?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by davidmarsh01)
    Sorry to be off topic, but what does "bsns" mean?

    And yeah, OP does seem kinda old fashioned.

    Serious Business = SRS BSNS
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Good on you, OP. Ignore all the retards who are going "HERP DERP LAME U NEED 2 GO OUT N GET PISSD N PULL M8", it's actually a refreshing change to see someone who wants something a little different.

    You just need to put yourself in social situations more often, where you'll have more of a chance of meeting someone. I'm sure the right person will come along eventually.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Maturity is a strange beast. I find that there are people like you, OP, who label themselves mature because they've done some thinking around the issues of going out and shagging around, etc, and have concluded it's more mature to do otherwise. But really, though they're thinking like a mature person, they're actually even more immature than the immature shagging-around people. At some point you will end up in the shagging-around stage and you will realise how out of your depth you really are.

    No neg rep because I'm the same.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    Hey buddy! Hit the search bar and write the word 'relationship'. Im sure you'll find threads started by 16/17 year old females who are desperate to get into a relationship. Start from there
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Bananas01)
    I just really want a relationship.
    ...
    I'm not really interested in sex and stuff yet

    A relationship without sex has a specific term: its called "friendship".

    If you're not willing or able to give a girl what she wants, how do you expect her to want to be in a relationship with you? Hmmm?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by py0alb)
    A relationship without sex has a specific term: its called "friendship".

    If you're not willing or able to give a girl what she wants, how do you expect her to want to be in a relationship with you? Hmmm?
    I disagree, mate.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Victor-PP)
    I disagree, mate.
    care to elaborate, buddy?

    (cue terence and philip)
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by py0alb)
    A relationship without sex has a specific term: its called "friendship".

    If you're not willing or able to give a girl what she wants, how do you expect her to want to be in a relationship with you? Hmmm?
    Not so. Some people don't have sex until they're married - doesn't mean they are not in a relationship, does it? Personally, I couldn't be in a relationship without the physical part but not all girls are looking for that either. I like this guy, leave him be man! lol
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: December 15, 2010
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    What newspaper do you read/prefer?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.