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I'm finding it hard to make friendships at uni Watch

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    I seem to be able to start talking to people ok. I'm not the most talkative, but I can start a conversation and talk about stuff. But the problem is taking it that step further or making people interested in me. I've been at uni since september and everyone I see has friend groups already, but I don't have anybody that I could really call a friend or a group that I could call a friend group. I know that I could go home over the christmas holidays and, unless things change, I wouldn't receive a single text from anyone here.

    I need advice on how to change it. Maybe somebody else has been in this situation before?
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    I didn't really know anyone until at least my second term. I did have people who I guess could be called friends (I hung out with them) but I really didn't know them that well and I didn't click with them. But your real friendships will be made in the second or final years so don't stress over that. Just try to get along with people well enough so you can branch out - that's all I did.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I seem to be able to start talking to people ok. I'm not the most talkative, but I can start a conversation and talk about stuff. But the problem is taking it that step further or making people interested in me. I've been at uni since september and everyone I see has friend groups already, but I don't have anybody that I could really call a friend or a group that I could call a friend group. I know that I could go home over the christmas holidays and, unless things change, I wouldn't receive a single text from anyone here.

    I need advice on how to change it. Maybe somebody else has been in this situation before?
    I was in a similar situation when I joined high school. But after Christmas I brought some people who I was still a bit close, but FARRRR from friends, something from Germany to eat. They liked it and appreciated it and took me with them.

    So I suggest during Christmas, find some nice chocolates or something exotic (unusual) and give it to those who you still talk to a lot. I'm sure they will love it and thank you for that and start talking to you. Probably gonna be a start at that time. Might start with talking about how your finding it so far and how ur family is like and how ur college was...

    I personally can't think of anything better. Those old "Try talking to them... bla bla bla..." I'm sure you know already. But take my idea.
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    (Original post by Ape Gone Insane)
    Bear in mind, a lot of lasting friendships happen in the second and third years of university. Find someone you think you can get along with and talk to them a few times.

    Persistence is the key here. You need to repeat the pattern or make a habit of talking to a specific person. If you make that effort, they will notice you and perhaps, become interested in you. Gauge their response to you initiating conversations as well. Maybe you'll find, one day, they start a conversation or approach you.

    (Original post by Broderss)
    I didn't really know anyone until at least my second term. I did have people who I guess could be called friends (I hung out with them) but I really didn't know them that well and I didn't click with them. But your real friendships will be made in the second or final years so don't stress over that. Just try to get along with people well enough so you can branch out - that's all I did.

    (Original post by llpokermuffinll)
    I was in a similar situation when I joined high school. But after Christmas I brought some people who I was still a bit close, but FARRRR from friends, something from Germany to eat. They liked it and appreciated it and took me with them.

    So I suggest during Christmas, find some nice chocolates or something exotic (unusual) and give it to those who you still talk to a lot. I'm sure they will love it and thank you for that and start talking to you. Probably gonna be a start at that time. Might start with talking about how your finding it so far and how ur family is like and how ur college was...

    I personally can't think of anything better. Those old "Try talking to them... bla bla bla..." I'm sure you know already. But take my idea.
    Thanks, will take all those into consideration. Those were all helpful pieces of advice.
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    Now go to sleep, it will help!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I seem to be able to start talking to people ok. I'm not the most talkative, but I can start a conversation and talk about stuff. But the problem is taking it that step further or making people interested in me. I've been at uni since september and everyone I see has friend groups already, but I don't have anybody that I could really call a friend or a group that I could call a friend group. I know that I could go home over the christmas holidays and, unless things change, I wouldn't receive a single text from anyone here.

    I need advice on how to change it. Maybe somebody else has been in this situation before?
    str8 up go to pub wiv dem and get SLOSHED diurtttty man. den like dem brag about vomitting all ova urself on da street and da will get u street cred, dunnoo mandem waguan 1 time xxx
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I seem to be able to start talking to people ok. I'm not the most talkative, but I can start a conversation and talk about stuff. But the problem is taking it that step further or making people interested in me. I've been at uni since september and everyone I see has friend groups already, but I don't have anybody that I could really call a friend or a group that I could call a friend group. I know that I could go home over the christmas holidays and, unless things change, I wouldn't receive a single text from anyone here.

    I need advice on how to change it. Maybe somebody else has been in this situation before?
    I kind of know how you feel. I have a few friends but none of them hang out in the same group, so I always feel like I'm tagging along.

    What are your interests? I know everybody says this, but join a society! People will find you interesting if you share interests() so look for a society that incorporates something you are passionate about, maybe something a bit quiet if you're the type. I found my friends in the hiking club.

    Good luck.
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    It's funny how many of these threads there are. I thought i was a total weirdo because i was struggling to make friends. But in all honesty it seems pretty common.

    For me, i continously remind myself were only 2 months in to university. At what other point in your life have you made close friends in 8 weeks?

    Just branch out, meet new people. Find activities that keep you busy, societies etc that you can meet people with similar interests. I'm sure you'll meet people soon x
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    You've got to reach out as well. You've got to initiate outings, texts, phone calls. The more you do that, the more comfortable you become with people and the closer to a friendship you'll begin to feel.
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    Thanks for those replies. In terms of societies, my uni only has sports, race and religious societies unfortunately, and I hate sports. I'll go on the other advice though too, thanks.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks for those replies. In terms of societies, my uni only has sports, race and religious societies unfortunately, and I hate sports. I'll go on the other advice though too, thanks.
    I wouldn't write off sports socs so easily. I'm awful at sport but go to quite a few of them, and though I wouldn't call any of them friends just yet, I've met some people there that I can imagine might turn out to be friends. In my experience, they're all usually welcoming to new people that aren't experienced, and there's usually a B team just for fun =)
 
 
 
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