My dad was diagnosed with bowel cancer today....

sorry to hear that

My dad was diagnosed with a Brain tumour about 6 years ago when i was 15. Everyone deals with it in their own way, just try and be optimistic till you know which way its going.

If it turns out to be life threatening make the most of the time. We where told he had 18 months we only got 6. Just be there for him.

whilst I was still in school living at home, i found that after he passed to be more disruptive with the affect it had on my mum and younger brother.

I would talk to him and see what he wants you to do. My sister was at Uni at the time and he had always wanted here to go to university. She was only a couple of hours away so she stayed on made it back home as much as possible.

sorry if I'm not much help, you need to find out how serious it is and talk with your family its a very personal thing that only you will know which way you need to deal with it.

I dealt with it in a similar way, not knowing what to feel and bottling up my emotions.

Sorry if my post is a bit about worst case scenario but I can only give you my experience.

My dad was diagnosed with Lymphoma 3 years ago. At the time the news of cancer didn't really sink in, I just carried on like normal which I think to some extent is important. Cancer can completely change somebody's life and it's important to have some form of normality like the example above about staying on at uni or making sure to carry on at college because your dad is not going to want you to give up your life completely. I think you should talk to your dad about it, he may want you to go. How far away is uni?

When you hear the word cancer your whole world can fall apart, you hear the death sentence and you can go into shock or of course anger/sadness.

Don't be afraid to talk about it, whether to another person, on here, to a counsilor (I ended up seeing on due to stress of college and my dad) and especially with your family since although you'll deal with it differently sharing how you're feeling may help since you're all in the same situation. At the same time don't be afraid to cry about it, get angry about it or be scared, its normal everyone goes through the motions and trying to ignore how you're feeling can sometimes make the situation worse.

I have to agree with making the most of the time you have, you don't yet know how bad it is so try and stay optimistic and try to stay strong for your dad, think about how you're going to fight this and have a goal. I know my dad's goal is to see me graduate uni whether he'll get there or not is another matter.

I hope that helps and the news you get soon will be the best you can.

i got a call from the nurse today and they officially confirmed its bowel cancer, but needs a ct scan to see what stages its on.

heres another problem though, when i told my mom she was acting like he deserved it (they are seperated) and when i asked her just incase i cant take him to the clinic, can she take him cause she's only got college and pretty much can get out of it and she said' i am busy you know and i dont want to go and ask your brother'.

i understand why she hates him but this is completely selfish, i told her we need to support him whenever we can, especially now theres two young kids 8 and 11 who might not see their dad again in another 2-5 years, her dad died of lung cancer, i thought she would understand from second person perspective and why i cried infront of her but she then said 'why are you crying, he's not even dead yet you idiot'

in all honesty ( i have anger management issues) at that moment i wanted to slap her, i thought how can you be selfish now, if it was another way round my dad would have supported her in a flash, he will do whatever needs to be done but she....


im just wondering if i need to bring the outside family into this as well, i know this is a bullying tactic and im not asking her for much other than maybe let him see the kids more or help him abit more, shes cares about face and what people think of her.....,i know the idea sounds inhumane but im sooo angry right now.

My mum was diagnosed with bowel cancer the year before I went to uni. I questioned whether I should be going too, and in the end I did. I'm glad I did because it made her happy I was still living my life and not getting weighed down by it. She's still having on and off treatment but is generally stable and okay. Keep strong xxx

yeah...im gonna talk to my dad about the uni thing, he will probably say i should go, but hopefully it hasnt reached to stage 4 (fingers crossed) because i read that theres a 70% curable rate with stage1,2 and possibly 3, which sounds pretty good, well at least theres abit of hope there.

thank you, to read that you mum is stable and okay from treatments of bowel cancer has given me abit of encouragement, i hope your mum battles it through with this and i wish her well.