Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Attracted to Pakistani girl Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    So there's this girl in one of my seminar groups that I really like. We get on really well and have the same warped sense of humour. However, she is quite a strict muslim, or at least appears so. She always wears hijab, tuts at girls wearing skirts and me wearing shorts once (wtf?) and lectures me on how my lifestyle is leading me "down the wrong path" yadayada. Besides this one aspect of her personality (religion) I find her kind and charming. I'm starting to develop a crush on her.

    Could any muslims give me a perspective on whether we could be in a relationship, what her male family members reactions would be etc.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    I personally couldn't deal with that in a relationship. It pissed me off enough that some of my atheist ex's kept going on at me about how much I drink and smoke, so I couldn't really imagine what it would be like should someone religious do so.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Stay the **** away. Alarm bells bro.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    There is no point. She is too strict(ish) to consider you as anything more than a friend since Muslim girls can't get with non-Muslim guys.

    And her dad would pimp slap you. I hope you have life insurance.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Mujeriego)
    There is no point. She is too strict(ish) to consider you as anything more than a friend since Muslim girls can't get with non-Muslim guys.

    And her dad would pimp slap you. I hope you have life insurance.
    That's not fair. I thought Islam was meant to be tolerant n stuff.

    Lol, really?

    Are you muslim?
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So there's this girl in one of my seminar groups that I really like. We get on really well and have the same warped sense of humour. However, she is quite a strict muslim, or at least appears so. She always wears hijab, tuts at girls wearing skirts and me wearing shorts once (wtf?) and lectures me on how my lifestyle is leading me "down the wrong path" yadayada. Besides this one aspect of her personality (religion) I find her kind and charming. I'm starting to develop a crush on her.

    Could any muslims give me a perspective on whether we could be in a relationship, what her male family members reactions would be etc.
    Depends if you find religion a deal breaker. She obviously is unlikely to hook up with you regardless seeing as her faith and culture will be leaning strongly on her to marry within the faith and community.

    Personally I couldn't date someone with serious religious convictions, it would just grate with my world view.

    But hey best of luck OP, your life.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's not fair. I thought Islam was meant to be tolerant n stuff.

    Lol, really?

    Are you muslim?
    Yes to both questions. It isn't a case of fair/unfair because religion, like surnames or nationality is passed down from the father's side. Just like in Judaism where the matrilineal side accounts for determining the child's identity, Islam places importance on the father's background. The only way around that is to convert to Islam but I doubt anyone would do that for a random bird on their course. I was just joking about the life insurance stuff though.



    But it would help if you wrote your will just in case.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Theres no harm in trying anyway and see how it goes
    if she accepts you in a relationship then its good if not then at least you wont have the feeling that you never tried..if you know what i mean, personally being a muslim i dont think religion should affect anything at this young age, its not like you are going to get married.

    show her you love her more than anyone else?
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Could any muslims give me a perspective on whether we could be in a relationship,
    No
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    what her male family members reactions would be etc.
    gtfo
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So there's this girl in one of my seminar groups that I really like. We get on really well and have the same warped sense of humour. However, she is quite a strict muslim, or at least appears so. She always wears hijab, tuts at girls wearing skirts and me wearing shorts once (wtf?) and lectures me on how my lifestyle is leading me "down the wrong path" yadayada. Besides this one aspect of her personality (religion) I find her kind and charming. I'm starting to develop a crush on her.

    Could any muslims give me a perspective on whether we could be in a relationship, what her male family members reactions would be etc.
    hmmmm, this is weird.
    you say shes strict and tuts at girls wearing skirts and you wearing shorts and lectures. Yet if she was that strict then she wouldn't be laughing and talking to you to begin with. - which makes me think that she already has feelings for you

    I'm a Muslim and far from strict but i would still only consider going into a relationship if i knew it was going to be really serious. not merely a 'crush' and by serious, i mean like engagement/marriage which i know terrifies most people, hahah

    if we assume that she is prepared to go into relationship with you then she'll probably do so behind her parents back, but these things never lasts long and she probably wont sleep with you or anything.

    even if you were really serious about her ( ie wanting to marry her) you would have to convert to Islam. that's the only way her parents will even accept you. a Muslim girl has to marry a Muslim man

    BUT, not all Muslims feel like that, I'm not Pakistani, I'm Arab and my parents don't really care who i marry (white,black,Asian,chinese) as long as they are Muslim and decent. some other parents however, will only allow their daughter to marry someone from the same country as them ie her parents might only let her marry
    a Pakistani man. if you are serious about her you could argue the case because in Islam it states that a Muslim girl can marry a Muslim man no matter where he's from. the whole marrying from the same country thing is just culture.

    it all depends on how much you like her and how far your prepared to sacrifice for her. if your looking for some fun romance while your at uni, she not the girl for you, I'm sorry

    ps- sorry for the long reply
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by bird_106)
    Theres no harm in trying anyway and see how it goes
    if she accepts you in a relationship then its good if not then at least you wont have the feeling that you never tried..if you know what i mean, personally being a muslim i dont think religion should affect anything at this young age, its not like you are going to get married.

    show her you love her more than anyone else?
    Thanks for advice. I do want to give it a shot but I'm nervous about getting in trouble with her family. Reason I'm nervous is because of reaction of the poster below you, sadly quite commonplace.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    You need to convert into Islam to marry her
    This is NOT a joke. My sis married Muslim guy and she converted herself into Islam prior to marriage.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks for advice. I do want to give it a shot but I'm nervous about getting in trouble with her family. Reason I'm nervous is because of reaction of the poster below you, sadly quite commonplace.
    You're assuming that her family is going to be what stops you being together, as opposed to her.
    If I were you, I'd talk to her about it. I'm just telling you two things - one is that Islam does not permit a Muslim woman to be with a non-Muslim man, which is just a fact. The second is that it if it did get to the stage of her family knowing about a relationship, they would not be happy about it. This is not a fact, just an estimation of the most likely scenario.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's not fair. I thought Islam was meant to be tolerant n stuff.

    Lol, really?

    Are you muslim?
    Lol, out of all the things used to describe Islam, you came up with tolerant?

    Is there any chance of you converting to Islam?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's not fair. I thought Islam was meant to be tolerant n stuff.

    Lol, really?

    Are you muslim?

    It's as if you planned this troll response :rolleyes:

    - She probably isn't interested in you if she is as religious as you make her seem.
    - She wouldn't be interested in any of the "usual" stuff people would do at that age.
    - And if things do get serious then you won't be able to marry her unless you yourself are a Muslim.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    There's always conversion.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by n1r4v)
    Lol, out of all the things used to describe Islam, you came up with tolerant?

    Is there any chance of you converting to Islam?
    Muslims tell me its tolerant, peaceful. Well she's the only muslim I really know so thats what she tells me...
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by In2deep)
    It's as if you planned this troll response :rolleyes:

    - She probably isn't interested in you if she is as religious as you make her seem.
    - She wouldn't be interested in any of the "usual" stuff people would do at that age.
    - And if things do get serious then you won't be able to marry her unless you yourself are a Muslim.
    Paranoid.

    She does "normal" stuff. Going to cinema, shopping. She went with me to my friends punk gig.

    Not really looking to marry her tbh...
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    how about "irishing up" her drinks... getting her tipsy is always a good start to a healthy and prosperous relationship
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    It will last for 10 days when there is a full moon on ramadan
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: May 25, 2011
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Did TEF Bronze Award affect your UCAS choices?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.