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Struggling with having no friends. Watch

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    So this is a bit of an awkward situation. Basically I'm 19, didn't go to uni like the majority of my friendship group and over the last year I've totally lost contact with them. I still had some contact with some of them online, but now they just can't be bothered with me anymore.

    I was advised that I would make friends at work and college, but in all honesty most of my collegues are older than me, and the one that isn't has a very young child, and though we get on great we never go anywhere because of this.

    At college - and this sounds awful, I know - I'm just...too bright. I'm in a class of people doing an NVQ level 2, and I thought there might be more people like me there, but it seems that my sense of humour just totally eludes them. They're nice people, but we just haven't clicked at all.

    I've just signed back up to violin lessons to give myself something to do away from work and home, but they're not exactly the way to go meeting people.

    I've only had one boyfriend, and that ended 4 years ago so I don't even have that to fall back on. And it's a subject of much amusement amongst my so called "friends" that lost their virginity at university to flatmates and the like that I still have mine.

    I'm not a pub or a night club person, and I'm very shy. What can I do? I feel totally lost and alone and it's very depressing. And more than anything I'm angry at the people that can't be bothered with me anymore.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So this is a bit of an awkward situation. Basically I'm 19, didn't go to uni like the majority of my friendship group and over the last year I've totally lost contact with them. I still had some contact with some of them online, but now they just can't be bothered with me anymore.

    I was advised that I would make friends at work and college, but in all honesty most of my collegues are older than me, and the one that isn't has a very young child, and though we get on great we never go anywhere because of this.

    At college - and this sounds awful, I know - I'm just...too bright. I'm in a class of people doing an NVQ level 2, and I thought there might be more people like me there, but it seems that my sense of humour just totally eludes them. They're nice people, but we just haven't clicked at all.

    I've just signed back up to violin lessons to give myself something to do away from work and home, but they're not exactly the way to go meeting people.

    I've only had one boyfriend, and that ended 4 years ago so I don't even have that to fall back on. And it's a subject of much amusement amongst my so called "friends" that lost their virginity at university to flatmates and the like that I still have mine.

    I'm not a pub or a night club person, and I'm very shy. What can I do? I feel totally lost and alone and it's very depressing. And more than anything I'm angry at the people that can't be bothered with me anymore.
    Get a job? Always a good way to mix with people, spend time with family. Try get on better with the people at College, just because these people aren't as smart as you, doesn't mean you can't share the same interests...

    There's all sorts... Join the gym? Join a club? etc
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Oh I'm not trying to be snobby, it just they tend to avoid me when I make a joke. And I've managed to get some of them into conversation, but not found anything in common with them at all.

    I'm a gamer, an anime lover, love playing music and drawing. -shrug-
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    I love people like you. There are so many ways to meet people nowadays. I wish i had a proper good gamer friend irl.
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    Aww I'm a gamer too, PM me if you want
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    Don't be disheartened OP.

    During different times of your life you will have different numbers of friends and they will vary in quality!

    It sounds to me like you might benefit from going to university, please remember it's never too late to do that if you want to!

    Otherwise, I think you just need to look in the right places. Working environments aren't great for making friends unless there happen to be like minded people. There must be ways of accessing people like yourself. Research local opportunities - clubs, groups, etc
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    TBH I did consider going to university, but particularly with a potential imminent rise in fees, and having no idea what I want to do I don't really want to go just yet. I'd rather work a few years and try and find out what career I'm suited to, which is why I'm doing this apprenticeship now.

    I do tend to get on quite well with university students, and I could probably find some, Nottingham isn't far from me. It's just going there alone to do it. ^^'
    • #2
    #2

    I don't have many friends at the moment... And I'm not even bothered!

    I'm more bothered that I should be bothered. I know I should want friends, but I don't.

    At school and uni I could have been really sociable. Instead I just did everything on my own. Outwardly I must have appeared stuck-up and cold.

    Anyway I start a new job next week and I reeeally want to make an effort. My issue is I don't relate to others well. I hope this changes next week.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I did feel like that for a little while. Unfortunately I don't now. I think part of it is old "friends" teasing me about my situation with a lack of friends living locally and not having had a boyfriend for so long.

    I don't even want to get out as such. I'd love to just have one friend whose house I could just go crash at, be super lazy with. Just...someone I can talk to face to face.
 
 
 
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