Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Does this guy just want to have sex? Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    So I got to know this guy on the internet and we exchanged facebooks. We texted quite regularly and then he finally asked me out. I said yes because he seemed to be an interesting guy.
    I met him yesterday. It went better than I'd expected actually. He was very cool, goodlooking and it was just really nice and comfortable to talk to him. He drove us around and we just sat in the car and had a nice conversation. There was nothing sexual, just normal talking. I know this sounds pretty simple but I did have a great time getting to know him. I could tell he was interested in me and i liked him too.
    Then today we texted as usual and we got to decide that the next date was gonna be at my place. We would watch some movies and drink... I know its weird to take a guy home on the 2nd date but idk why I didnt feel uncomfortable. Then he asked me about my flat and how big my room was. I found it a lil bit strange but answered anyway. So i told him my room was a double room blah blah blah. Then he asked me if i had a double bed as well. I asked him why he'd asked and he said it was just purely wondering... I said yes and after a few more texts, he said: "Am I gonna stay over or drive home?" Loool I was surprised at how brave this guy was to ask such a thing, it was completely opposite to how he behaved when we first met. So I said he could stay over and also added that there was a free room in my flat and he could sleep in there. lol (i only said this because he asked those silly questions though. i didnt think about whether we were gonna do it. I thought i'd let things happen naturally)

    I didnt get a reply for about half an hour then i got on facebook and he was on. So I said hi and asked if he got my last text, he said yes but there was smth wrong with his phone and it didnt let him reply. This obviously sounded fishy but i didnt say anything. Then I started asking him to make plans for the next date, like where to park his car, what time he'd be here, what drinks to have....... and he seemed to be into the conversation and make plans with me. So he sounded interested. Then his mate came and we said bye. It has been like 6 hours and he hasnt texted me, which is strange coz he always texts me quite regularly. And its like 2.30 am now he didnt text me before going to sleep.

    I dont know what to think of this guy. Why do people think that if someone invites them home, it means there's sex involved? Do you think he is just interested in sex? He seemed to be so nice when we first met yesterday, seemed like a normal guy, not a pervert.
    I dont think I should text him coz if he is interested, he should text me right? does it clearly mean that he ONLY wants sex and I should forget about him?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    By the Smell of it I would think "YES".....
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Yes. He is only after sex. Tell him to **** off. Or words to a similar effect.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by humbugsftw)
    Tell him to **** off. Or words to a similar effect.
    these are similar words :yes:

    "**** me"
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mr. Orange)
    these are similar words :yes:

    "**** me"
    Oi vey. :rolleyes:
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Someone's attached
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Well, how about you? do you want it? You brought him home and humoured his questions about beds and rooms, rather suggesting that sex was on the cards.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Yeeeks Gawd, where do we start....there are so many things wrong with your situation! I'm gonna break this **** down like a rubix cube, so bear with me as this is gonna be a long post!.....

    Key point here before I start: neither you nor this guy were honest with each other about what you wanted from the other right from the start. If this guy just wanted sex, he should've been man enough to tell you that straightforwardly and give you the option to either reciprocate or reject his interests.

    Second point: What are you looking for/what do you want from this guy? A monogamous or non-monogamous relationship? Long-term or short term? Casual or more-serious? Did you tell him this from the start?

    You're now in what I call the 'ambiguous zone', where each party is confused about the other person's intentions! Not good! You could've avoided this confusion if you were simply honest with each from the start about what you wanted from each other.

    Next time you meet or call him, ask him straight 'what do you want from me?' and get him to be honest from you. Tell him what it is you're looking for.
    If you're on the same page, carry on seeing each other. If not, go your separate ways.

    To be honest, this guy sounds like a spineless pussy, for example:-

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Then he asked me about my flat and how big my room was. I found it a lil bit strange but answered anyway. So i told him my room was a double room blah blah blah. Then he asked me if i had a double bed as well. I asked him why he'd asked and he said it was just purely wondering...
    He's trying to have sex with you by 'sneaking in under the radar' instead of just being honest with you about his intentions. He was 'just wondering'? Yeh right. He's trying to 'hint' at wanting sex, without telling you directly that's what he wants. That's WEAK.

    More points about your situation....

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So I got to know this guy on the internet and we exchanged facebooks. We texted quite regularly and then he finally asked me out.
    What is it with this day and age and people using the internet/Facebook etc to meet the opposite sex? I think it's SAD that men can't approach women in real life these days. Seriously, 99.99% of men in society can't approach a woman they fancy in the REAL WORLD. It just seems like today that men and women only talk to each other 1) when drunk in a bar or club, or 2) over the internet either on dating sites or Facebook etc. How sad! **** that, I prefer to approach women in real life.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I met him yesterday. It went better than I'd expected actually. He was very cool, goodlooking and it was just really nice and comfortable to talk to him. He drove us around and we just sat in the car and had a nice conversation. There was nothing sexual, just normal talking. I know this sounds pretty simple but I did have a great time getting to know him. I could tell he was interested in me and i liked him too.
    Riiiight....so did you kiss each other on the first date? Did you hold hands? Touch each other? Was there any sexual element to the date (kissing at least), or was it just like meeting up with a male buddy, i.e. no touching or anything?

    The guy should always LEAD....and it sounds as though he was too timid to make a move. I can't believe you'd have much attraction towards a guy who was too timid to make a move....NO GIRL wants a timid guy.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It has been like 6 hours and he hasnt texted me, which is strange coz he always texts me quite regularly. And its like 2.30 am now he didnt text me before going to sleep.
    Stop all this texting back and forth, stop all this 'messaging each other on Facebook', etc etc and get together IN PERSON.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I know its weird to take a guy home on the 2nd date
    Is it? In whose mind? What are your personal 'rules'...i.e..How many dates do you expect to wait before you invite a guy back to your place? How many dates do you expect to wait before you have sex with a guy? Did you make this clear to the guy when you met him? I'm willing to bet you didn't.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    after a few more texts, he said: "Am I gonna stay over or drive home?" Loool I was surprised at how brave this guy was to ask such a thing,
    Riiiighhht...he's hardly brave for HINTING he wants sex over TEXT. Better to be HONEST he wants sex (no hinting), and TELL YOU IN PERSON.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So I said he could stay over and also added that there was a free room in my flat and he could sleep in there. lol (i only said this because he asked those silly questions though. i didnt think about whether we were gonna do it. I thought i'd let things happen naturally)
    What? Again, you're PLAYING GAMES with him. You know full well that a guy doesn't want to stay over so he can sleep in the other room. Are you that naive? Or just 'trying to pretend that sex is the last thing on your mind'. Stop that **** lol.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I asked him why he'd asked and he said it was just purely wondering... I said yes and it was completely opposite to how he behaved when we first met.
    Listen to what you just said there: THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF HOW HE BEHAVED WHEN WE FIRST MET. In other words, this guy wasn't honest right from the start about his sexual interest in you. He acted like the 'gentlemanly nice guy' from the beginning, devoid of any sexuality, then a few days later he tries to then on his sexual side. In other words, he hid his true desires and he hid his true personality at the beginning, and then REVEALED IT LATER. WEAK!

    A REAL MAN wouldn't have hidden his sexual interest in the beginning. For example, if I am attracted to a girl, she knows it RIGHT AWAY. Of course I'm classy about it, but I'm also honest and direct about my sexual interest in a girl. You're guy wasn't upfront at all. He exhibited phony, fake 'nice guy' behavior at the start, and now he's 'trying to turn sexual on you', and he just comes across as creepy and weak.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I dont know what to think of this guy. Why do people think that if someone invites them home, it means there's sex involved? Do you think he is just interested in sex? He seemed to be so nice when we first met yesterday, seemed like a normal guy, not a pervert.
    'Inviting someone home' could have platonic connotations. It could have sexual connotations. 'Inviting someone home' is a really vague statement that leaves you in doubt about someone's intentions. As I said earlier, the problem here is that the guy hasn't communicated his intentions to you honestly and directly. He's beating around the bush and being really 'wishy washy', and you are confused.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I dont think I should text him coz if he is interested, he should text me right? does it clearly mean that he ONLY wants sex and I should forget about him?
    Again, quit PLAYING GAMES. Seriously, by 'waiting for him to text you first' because 'he should text me' is PLAYING GAMES.

    Like I said....text him/call him to arrange to meet up, then when you meet up you ask him straight what he wants from you, and you tell him what you want from him. Quit with the games and instead just be honest and straight with him about how you feel. Be REAL and honest with each other.

    I'm gonna leave you with this last thing. The 3 most important things in ANY relationship are HONESTY, TRUST and RESPECT. You haven't got these in your 'relationship'....you're both indulging in DISHONESTY, MANIPULATIVE HEAD GAMES, and generally 'too much beating around the bush'. **** that....being REAL and being HONEST with each other could've avoided this crap.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Give him some space for Godsake!!!!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    he's playing games? his phone won't let him text you back, think about it :facepalm2:
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: December 5, 2010
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Did TEF Bronze Award affect your UCAS choices?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.