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Do you ever just keep a crush as a crush? Watch

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    There's this guy I like and tbh, we have absolutely nothing in common. The problem is that seems to happen to me all the time for me. 90% of the boys that I am attracted to are the polar opposites of me, and it always feels like it could never work. So I keep them as crushes until the feeling fades.

    I was just wondering, does anyone else do that? I mean, does anyone else decide not act on a crush?
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    Sometimes the opposites attract, I acted on my last crush but we had a lot in common, so I don't know.
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    (Original post by Chayne)
    There's this guy I like and tbh, we have absolutely nothing in common. The problem is that seems to happen to me all the time for me. 90% of the boys that I am attracted to are the polar opposites of me, and it always feels like it could never work. So I keep them as crushes until the feeling fades.

    I was just wondering, does anyone else do that? I mean, does anyone else decide not act on a crush?
    Yeah, but only because actually liking someone paralyses me with fear and distorted cognition. Never been on so much as a date with anyone I've had a crush on.
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    opposites attract and it's HOT. I personally would think my ideal match would be my opposite.

    But yeah I understand what you said about keeping crushes crushes, I guess I'm to lazy to pursue anyone :/
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    I am currently not acting on a crush because they are in a 2 and a half year relationship. I don't think that's what you meant though...
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    I keep mine as they are.
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    (Original post by Rock Fan)
    Sometimes the opposites attract, I acted on my last crush but we had a lot in common, so I don't know.
    So you've never had an impossible crush?


    (Original post by Arekkusu)
    Yeah, but only because actually liking someone paralyses me with fear and distorted cognition. Never been on so much as a date with anyone I've had a crush on.
    I can relate to that. So you're saying, you've never acted on a crush?



    (Original post by ipulledhermione)
    opposites attract and it's HOT. I personally would think my ideal match would be my opposite.

    But yeah I understand what you said about keeping crushes crushes, I guess I'm to lazy to pursue anyone :/
    Ahaha, I agree with what you say. Though whenever I think about being with my opposite, I imagine us sitting there in silence with no idea what to talk about. Which leads to me imagining us doing things that require no talking...... but that's not a relationship really, is it. :P

    But yeah, that's an interesting way of looking at it - I reckon I'm lazy too now you mention it. Why put in the effort if there's a high chance it won't work?


    (Original post by katyness)
    I keep mine as they are.
    Always? Why?
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    How is yours an impossible crush?
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    (Original post by Chayne)

    But yeah, that's an interesting way of looking at it - I reckon I'm lazy too now you mention it. Why put in the effort if there's a high chance it won't work?


    Always? Why?
    You've answered yourself. I know from experience that if I move to a guy, it's over. Im just rubbish at moving to guys....
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    all my crushes have remained crushes inspite me trying hard....
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    (Original post by Chayne)
    I can relate to that. So you're saying, you've never acted on a crush?
    I have, I guess. I introspected about this recently: I've had 5 major crushes.

    First one I was like 11 and too breezily clueless to do anything other than think about her.

    Second one I was like 14/15, that was brutal. I had a crush on her for well over a year. In the end, I made a cursory attempt to get to know her and asked her out; I knew she'd reject me. She was a bit of a formative experience, unfortunately.

    Third one was directly after that as I went into sixth form. She was capricious and quickly became cold with me so I didn't act. Short and stormy crush.

    Fourth one was in my gap year. Lovely girl and liked me, we were close. She rejected me but we eventually got together half-heartedly like 2 weeks before uni, typically of my life. By then I'd lost the crush*.

    Fifth one was at the start of uni, we got off and and got on like a house on fire. Obviously unsexy body, but what did I care, I was smitten. We chatted really well but I stopped texting her to see if she'd text me: she didn't.

    *I have the certain fear that if I ever were to get together with any of my crushes, this would happen instantly.
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    (Original post by Chayne)
    There's this guy I like and tbh, we have absolutely nothing in common. The problem is that seems to happen to me all the time for me. 90% of the boys that I am attracted to are the polar opposites of me, and it always feels like it could never work. So I keep them as crushes until the feeling fades.

    I was just wondering, does anyone else do that? I mean, does anyone else decide not act on a crush?
    Its true about that opposites attract thing... because it will take me a hell of a long time to find someone that is like me...
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    Yes, always. Usually my crushes have been on people who were in relationships, so obviously just waited for them to fizzle out. On occassions I've just felt nothing back from the other person, so just left it, assuming that if they liked me back there'd be signs. Maybe that's a bit cowardly of me heh. If 2 people have a crush on eachother though, the chemistry is so obvious and things just kind of happen without anyone having to act upon it, that's what is was like for my only 2 relationships. I dunno, haven't had a crush in years...
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    I've never had a crush that I would have wanted to develop into an actual relationship if given the chance... (probably why I've never been in a relationship)

    I don't know, I just like the thrilling feeling and infatuation associated with a crush, and eventually that feeling passes without much pain (usually). Relationships look hard and stressful.
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    I always do that, it's probably my biggest flaw. I either just don't tend to talk to them because I'm worried about awkwardness, or get into the friend stage so it ends up becoming too strange...
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    I had a super crush between the ages of like 12 and 15 on a guy I went to high school with, and I never acted on it.
    But then, he had an on/off girlfriend for most of that time; was very popular and talkative whilst I was shy, socially inept, etc; he talked about sex a lot (as boys that age tend to do lol) and I knew that I was nowhere near ready for anything sexual, had a lot of issues with my body, etc; and I did know that he was actually kind of a ****.

    I had a couple more minor crushes on friends of mine but knew that they were really just to pass the time in my own head, and wouldn't be good relationships. Didn't act on those either.

    First two crushes that I did act on both turned me down lol. :rolleyes:

    And then my current bf had a crush on me, and we started seeing each other, etc.


    I didn't mean to give you my whole life story, it just happened.
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    How do you know that it wouldn't work with one of these guys you deem to be your complete opposite? Why not give it a chance? You might find that you have more in common than you think. Also, having things in common is more about shared morals, ideas and values rather than hobbies etc.
    Sometimes it can be good to pursue things with someone who doesn't seem like your usual type (as long as the attraction is there, obviously). And if it doesn't work out, then it doesn't work out.
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    I've got a crush on this one guy in my sixthform... totally not the type to be in a relationship but he's so lovely. I know I can't act on it.. he'll reject me and I'm not the person who goes into relationships (never had one tbh).
    I kinda... stalk him. Lol don't get this the wrong way... I watch him. and my heart flutters... ughhh and then I see him with other girls I get so angry and thats its... my day is ruined. I purposely wait for the late bus so I can get on with him and maybe talk to him. Sometimes our knees touch on the bus.. I feel electricity. :love: I talk to him sometimes on fb but then I stopped to see if he would ever spark a convo... he doesn't. I'm not pretty.. I wil admit it.. I'm not the skinniest. OH well. It'll fade.

    I'm not going to act on it... because I'm a douche.
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    (Original post by Rock Fan)
    How is yours an impossible crush?
    Oh, I didn't mean to say mine is impossible. I know it's not - just extremely unlikely.
    I was just wondering if you've never had one.
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    (Original post by kmansick)
    all my crushes have remained crushes inspite me trying hard....
    Ahh, how comes?
 
 
 
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