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LS.
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#121
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#121
(Original post by Daveo)
I think that is the reason I did it, it meant i was concentrating completely on that, pushing away all the rubbish in my life and it was a way of escaping reality.
I guess it seems like we did it for the same reason. I can only hope that I manage to stop too. I have to admit, I only started a few weeks ago, when everything seemed to hit a new low, and I've only done it a few times since. I'm trying to find other ways to 'escape' but it isn't the same.
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PunkInBlack
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#122
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#122
I always felt that by cutting myself i was releasing all those feelings that were eating me up inside...
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FlutterByKisses
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#123
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#123
I have been diagnosed with depression and bulimia, and used to self harm a lot. Things are slowly getting better for me. I have to admit that I think that the reason things are getting better is my boyfriend. Ever since I started going out with him in June things have slowly begun to get better. He is so understanding and willing to help me through things and is there when I need him. I also hae my counsellor who I go to see at least once every two weeks. I used to have to go twice a week at the worst of it all. I havn't actually "cut" since the end of August, but there have been times when I have felt the need to. I tend to cry. A lot. But I have my closest friends and my boyfriend. If I didn't have them I'm prety sure I wouldn't be here...
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SciFi25
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#124
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#124
(Original post by auser)
i cross my arms or twist the left one sideways to make them less visible if i don't have sleeves
All of my friends know and i tell everyone else when they ask. I am not ashamed, I am proud that I have managed to defeat such adversity.
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Cirsium
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#125
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#125
Telling the first person is the biggest step... thank god i was pissed

Telling my mum was the worst. I knew when i wanted to stop that the only way was to tell her. And when it all went wrong again and she was so scared of losing me... i couldn't carry on like that. I couldn't do that to somebody who i cared about so much.
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FlutterByKisses
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#126
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#126
(Original post by Bekaboo)
Telling the first person is the biggest step... thank god i was pissed

Telling my mum was the worst. I knew when i wanted to stop that the only way was to tell her. And when it all went wrong again and she was so scared of losing me... i couldn't carry on like that. I couldn't do that to somebody who i cared about so much.

I can't tell my mum. Or anyone else in my family. I can't face it. The few people that know don't know the severity of things at their worst.
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SciFi25
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#127
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#127
(Original post by Bekaboo)
Telling the first person is the biggest step... thank god i was pissed

The first person I told was my best friend, her reaction was one of total and utter support. For which I am completely in her debt as I am totally sure that without her I would not have managed to stop. I think stopping is all finding someone who will go to that level of support for you.
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Cirsium
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#128
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#128
Consider yourself lucky

The first time i told sumthing went along these lines:
Lma's 17th bday party:
*i stretch*
Will: Bek what's that?
Me: Huh?
Will: What the **** is that?
Me: What?
Will: On your waist. The mark. What the **** is that?
Me: Oh. Ummm look this isn't really the
Will: Bek! Tell me!
Me: Look not in front of ppl ok
Will: No tell me now...

And so i told him everything in the space of about 5 sentences and ran fromt he room. Thankfully every1 got so drunk they 4got. He did come and find me and asked if i was ok and then said no of course you're not ok and went away again. And then we never spoke about it ever again
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Daveo
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#129
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#129
(Original post by LS.)
I guess it seems like we did it for the same reason. I can only hope that I manage to stop too. I have to admit, I only started a few weeks ago, when everything seemed to hit a new low, and I've only done it a few times since. I'm trying to find other ways to 'escape' but it isn't the same.
Unfortunately I can't advise you on how to stop, I don't want to say see your GP or somesuch as I know if your anything like I was that seems like an impossibilty, I never told anyone and I managed to stop but I longed to have someone to talk to about it, someone I trusted completely so if there is someone who you trust, try talking to them and see if it helps.
If you ever wanna talk just let me know.
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SciFi25
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#130
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#130
OMG, I am so sorry Bekaboo. *offers a hug* No offense but I hate people who just dismiss such a dangerous illness as something to be ignored. I have been luck in that everyone of my friends who knows has been very understanding about it.
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Cirsium
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#131
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#131
Don't worry i didn't mean that in a grrrrrr count urself lucky way.
I just meant i envy people who had someone to be there for them
As it happens my (now) best friend was utterly amazing and between him and my (now) ex bf i think i'm through it more or less. It makes it so much easier when there's somebody to be there for you even if they don't understand
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nofx
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#132
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#132
i could never tell anyone. basically, i dont want to be judged on it and i dont feel like im close to anyone to tell them.
yesterday, someone asked me about them because he had seen it and was genuinly worried and as soon as he mentioned it i felt so vulnerable and weak. its like its my own secret which only i know, and telling people would be revealing too much.
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PunkInBlack
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#133
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#133
(Original post by nofx)
i could never tell anyone. basically, i dont want to be judged on it and i dont feel like im close to anyone to tell them.
yesterday, someone asked me about them because he had seen it and was genuinly worried and as soon as he mentioned it i felt so vulnerable and weak. its like its my own secret which only i know, and telling people would be revealing too much.
My stepdad asked me about my scars. He knew what they were but didn't want to directly contfront me about them. But i felt so...like you said...weak...all i could think of was what was going through his head at that moment...
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nofx
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#134
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#134
(Original post by PunkInBlack)
My stepdad asked me about my scars. He knew what they were but didn't want to directly contfront me about them. But i felt so...like you said...weak...all i could think of was what was going through his head at that moment...
exactly and i dont want people to think im utterly crazy or messed up because i really dont think i am. but people who dont understand about these things (most people) generally do think that.
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Mad Vlad
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#135
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#135
Check your PM's nofx...
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nofx
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#136
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#136
(Original post by Mad Vlad)
Check your PM's nofx...
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PunkInBlack
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#137
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#137
(Original post by nofx)
exactly and i dont want people to think im utterly crazy or messed up because i really dont think i am. but people who dont understand about these things (most people) generally do think that.
I know. Thats the thing, if people self harm then that means that we're crazy...thats the really fked up thing about some ppl. Some people dont seem to realise that we all handle things differenlty...
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drago di giada
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#138
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#138
(Original post by phreek)
Anyone ever done it?

I went thru a phase of cutting myself. Now i just punch stuff all the time.
Personally I take a bunch of rubber bands and put them around my wrists.. stings quite a bit, leaves wealts.. for only a little while, and doesn't leave those nasty scars. The bigger the rubber band (thicker) the worse the hit.. sometimes it's very satisfying. Not to mention it helps me bite my tongue in some.. intense situations.
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Sarky
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#139
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#139
As someone who went through a period of self harm and is currently "in remission " from depression, i can understand a lot of the feelings people are having at the moment. Even though i don't have the desire to self harm in the same way that i used to, i'd be lying if i said this thread didn't trigger me. There was a time when i would look to anything to escape the pain of everyday life, and for me self harming did that up to a point. I still have weak days, but having been in hospital twice and seen just how much mental health issues are neglected i can say that i'm glad i have the perspective that i do. Hopefully as a medical student my past health problems have taught me not to judge people in the way some people in this thread have.
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ace_justncase
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#140
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#140
(Original post by phreek)
never cut wrists, just non-lethal places, i just liked the thrill of cutting and watching it, i didnt wanna die
Never come near me!!!
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