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One year later :( what is wrong with me... watch

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    Basically I was 'seeing' this girl just over a year ago now, and it never advanced furthet than that, as she 'changed her mind'. I really liked this girl, she was the first that I properly liked who also liked me back. Obviously since she changed her mind, I was left with so many unrequited feelings and confusion, and a year later, they haven't warn off.
    A year later, she's still on my mind almost all day obviously I've tried other things, tried talking to other girls, but this girl is just still always on ky mind. I want it to stop so badly, has this ever happened to any of you? I've actually just been miserable for an entire year because of it...
    Thanks!
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    Exact same thing happened to me with my ex however he ended it because of other reasons *eyeroll*

    I thought about him for 9 months then the other day, I sent a *****y text about how much he had ruined my life since I met him and then he was a prat and I'm over him now

    *massive cyber hugs* it'll happen eventually, you'll get over her. Perhaps it's more difficult because there wasn't any real reason for the break-up apart from 'changed her mind' which would make it more difficult because it's not a real reason! Hope you find someone who deserves this much care and love
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    Ah, thats upsetin, I've liked this guy for about a year now, but I aint got the guts to tell him . U still in contact with her? If yeah, then maybe talk to her?
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    The exact same thing happened to me, except with a boy. We were seeing eachother, he asked me to be his girlfriend, and the next day, he chnaged his mind. I was heartbroken. I stopped talking to him and wallowed.
    It turns out that he regretted it (we had mutual friends) but by the time he got in contact with me again, I had got over him, by focusing on his bad points, going out and flirting with guys, reassuring myself that men found me attractive and it was HIS loss.

    I ended up getting my own back because I agreed to go on a date with him to the cinema: he paid for premier seats, bought all the food/drinks AND took me out for dinner afterwards, three course meal etc. Then, when he took me home (a good 45 minutes from his), I said "Cheers" and as he leaned in for a kiss, I walked into my house and slammed the door in his face. And I never spoke to him again.

    Anyway, so. Focus on her bad points. Go as far as to make a list (purely cons, mind! There are no pros about this girl as as your concerned!) and just make yourself realise that she is not worth it.

    Go out with your friends, and I know you said you always think about this girl, but just get her out you head for one night. Maybe actually getting with a girl as opposed to just talking to one will help you forget about her. You need a rebound to get over her, me thinks.
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    Yep this is happening to me, although it hasn't been a year. 2 months ago this girl started showing an interest in me, consequently asked me out and we had some great times, I really liked her, she was totally on my level. Unfortunately there was another guy on the scene she 'cared for' who asked her out while we were dating and she said yes. One minute I was on top of the world, next the rug was pulled from under my feet.
    The worst thing is that she's in both of my lectures so every week my feelings for her re-surface while I try and act like it doesn't bother me. Bad times.
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    (Original post by balface)
    The exact same thing happened to me, except with a boy. We were seeing eachother, he asked me to be his girlfriend, and the next day, he chnaged his mind. I was heartbroken. I stopped talking to him and wallowed.
    It turns out that he regretted it (we had mutual friends) but by the time he got in contact with me again, I had got over him, by focusing on his bad points, going out and flirting with guys, reassuring myself that men found me attractive and it was HIS loss.

    I ended up getting my own back because I agreed to go on a date with him to the cinema: he paid for premier seats, bought all the food/drinks AND took me out for dinner afterwards, three course meal etc. Then, when he took me home (a good 45 minutes from his), I said "Cheers" and as he leaned in for a kiss, I walked into my house and slammed the door in his face. And I never spoke to him again.

    Anyway, so. Focus on her bad points. Go as far as to make a list (purely cons, mind! There are no pros about this girl as as your concerned!) and just make yourself realise that she is not worth it.

    Go out with your friends, and I know you said you always think about this girl, but just get her out you head for one night. Maybe actually getting with a girl as opposed to just talking to one will help you forget about her. You need a rebound to get over her, me thinks.
    nice revenge!!

    Honestly, her advice DOES work! I focused on my ex's bad points (he had a lot, WTF was I thinking...?) and I gave myself 'me' time by going out with friends, doing things he never wanted me doing etc
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    (Original post by converselove)
    Exact same thing happened to me with my ex however he ended it because of other reasons *eyeroll*

    I thought about him for 9 months then the other day, I sent a *****y text about how much he had ruined my life since I met him and then he was a prat and I'm over him now

    *massive cyber hugs* it'll happen eventually, you'll get over her. Perhaps it's more difficult because there wasn't any real reason for the break-up apart from 'changed her mind' which would make it more difficult because it's not a real reason! Hope you find someone who deserves this much care and love
    Whereas most people love getting a "*****y text" out of the blue
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    (Original post by Installation)
    Whereas most people love getting a "*****y text" out of the blue
    he deserved it. You don't know the full story...
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    (Original post by converselove)
    nice revenge!!
    Thanks
    It felt so good to slam the door in his smarmy, chinless face. Can't beeelive what I saw in him! I was young and naive....
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    (Original post by balface)
    Thanks
    It felt so good to slam the door in his smarmy, chinless face. Can't beeelive what I saw in him! I was young and naive....
    I bet!! I'd so love to get a chance for my ex to want me back then slam the door in his face... yeah so was I! Well, it was only 9 months ago but I've matured haha
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    (Original post by converselove)
    he deserved it. You don't know the full story...
    That wasn't the point. But you just goaded someone into being "a prat". If they really were that bad I don't see why that wouldn't have been enough...
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    (Original post by Installation)
    That wasn't the point. But you just goaded someone into being "a prat". If they really were that bad I don't see why that wouldn't have been enough...
    why what wouldn't have been enough? Calling him a prat? I didn't call him a prat in the text, I just said how much he ruined my life (which he did)...
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    (Original post by converselove)
    why what wouldn't have been enough? Calling him a prat? I didn't call him a prat in the text, I just said how much he ruined my life (which he did)...
    Na, you said you felt better when he replied to your *****y text and acted like a prat.

    What should've been enough for you to get over this guy is how bad he was to you originally, but apparently not (hence he didn't deserve the ***** text) so you had to goad him into acting like said prat so you could feel better.

    Phew...
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    Same here OP.
    He disappeared without calling/texting me back since his birthday.
    It was just last month but he did this a lot of times so this situation got me not trusting people anymore. First we've broken up it was like 11 months ago then we got back together. But since the first break up we had up until the 3rd last break up which was just last month, im still crazy about him. There's no day i've never thought of that man. During the break up, i became a poet. lol It kind of helped me became who i am and i like it. :awesome:
    Sadly, this past few days i've been having crazy dreams about him. Its crazy that i am scared of sleeping anymore just to not feel the betrayal that he did to me. It's giving me chest pain (don't want to sound emo lol :p: )

    I always keep myself busy just so it wont bother me that much. The hard part is when i get home and when im done in TSR, that when i feel lonely again. I've been working a lot lately and if im home and not on TSR, i have to chat to someone or call a friend just to not feel sad.
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    (Original post by balface)
    I ended up getting my own back because I agreed to go on a date with him to the cinema: he paid for premier seats, bought all the food/drinks AND took me out for dinner afterwards, three course meal etc. Then, when he took me home (a good 45 minutes from his), I said "Cheers" and as he leaned in for a kiss, I walked into my house and slammed the door in his face. And I never spoke to him again.
    Quite childish tbh. Real revenge would have been showing the person you moved on and had no time for them by not going on the date. What you did isnt revenge.
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    (Original post by JmJtr)
    Quite childish tbh. Real revenge would have been showing the person you moved on and had no time for them by not going on the date. What you did isnt revenge.
    It felt like revenge to me!
    It was a bit childish, to be fair...but I was 15 at the time so I think that's acceptable.

    And I did show him I had no time for him - even after all that, he text me for days afterwards asking to be his girlfriend and I ignored him, thus telling him that I had moved on and had no time for him. Does that fit into your revenge-tactics-on-a-mature level criteria?
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    Thanks for all the replies guys! It's good in a way to know that i'm not the only one.
    I'm in a hurry so i'll make it quick.
    But basically, the way I see it, since she's always on my mind, it all feels so fresh and recent, because I don't start forgetting bits of information or events - it sounds crazy I know. so in this case, I can't see like, the amount that i think of her decreasing anytime soon, it feels second nature to think about her -.-
    And I really want another girl or something, but it might end up feeling forced - I really liked the mentioned girl, we had so much in common, and everything clicked so well, she was like no one i've ever met before! It's horrible! But I want to do whatever it takes, I'll try jotting down all of the negative things about her, but I didn't even know her that long (so it seems crazy that I got so attatched, I know :/), so i don't know many bad things.
    Thank you tsr! <3
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    (Original post by Installation)
    Na, you said you felt better when he replied to your *****y text and acted like a prat.

    What should've been enough for you to get over this guy is how bad he was to you originally, but apparently not (hence he didn't deserve the ***** text) so you had to goad him into acting like said prat so you could feel better.

    Phew...
    Well I was blind so it wasn't enough, and I thought it was my fault...
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    Silly women taking things too seriously
 
 
 
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