can't satisfy my boyfriend sexually

alright, ive been with my boyfriend for six months and i love him alot. he loves me too.
the only problem is in the bedroom..
we had a fantastic sex life until about a week ago when he began to open up about his sexual fantasies and revealed he'd like me to do things to him that im not entirely comfortable with. its not affecting out relationship.. i want to please him but i dont want to perform acts that im not 100% about..
help?!

Reply 1

OceanInTheSky

16

I'll just ask what everyone will be thinking then:

What did he want you to do?

Reply 2

The Lyceum

13

Just bugger him. That'll learn him.

Reply 3

*Dreaming*

15

what kind of "acts?" Is it stuff involving human waste/whips/blood/animals/dead people or something, because if it is I can fully understand why you're not comfortable! If he fully loves and respects you he won't force you to do something you don't wanna do.

Reply 4

dreamer*girl

1

you could give them a try. if you really don't feel confortable doing them then tell him.
can't you specify a little more what "acts" are they?

Reply 5

RNBen

14

On another note, do you only have one photo pose? Your avatar picture and profile picture both have this same pose.

Just do them.

well, try to find a compromise to that. maybe you could modify his ideas so that they work for you, too. should not be a problem if it was good before.

of course sex influences your relationship. no good relationship with bad sex.

Reply 8

catsss

8

You shouldn't do things you're not comfortable with! But it doesn't hurt to explore, you might find you like some things you never expected. :smile:

Reply 9

Crazy Paving

17

Tell him to be grateful for what he is given.

Reply 10

Digit_Five

7

I demand that no one else tries to give any reasonable advice until we find out exactly what kind of freaky **** she's on about.

:mad:

Anal?

Just give some of it a whirl!
Variety is the spice of life!

Reply 13

MovingOn

10

Is he not satisfied with what you're already doing?

Reply 14

Reflexive

14

It's blates anal but I'm holding out for fisting

Reply 15

jasminejasmine

OP

3

nothing he's asked me to do is that out of the ordinary..
just anal and S&M..
only problem is, i'm not entirely comfortable with it as i said

Reply 16

Colour Me Pretty

15

Original post by jasminejasmine

nothing he's asked me to do is that out of the ordinary..
just anal and S&M..
only problem is, i'm not entirely comfortable with it as i said

Make sure you don't end up with a pink sock.

In all honesty, you're in your rights to refuse.
They're the types of things people love or hate.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 17

Kitty__

so many people saying "just do whatever he wants" I find quite shocking. If you're not comfortable with something you shouldn't feel obliged to do it just to please your boyfriend. It's good that he's opening up to you about his fantasies and shows that you have a good level of communication and trust in your relationship... but maybe you should start thinking about your own pleasure and your own desires... it works both ways.

Reply 18

Sakura-Chan

20

Original post by jasminejasmine

nothing he's asked me to do is that out of the ordinary..
just anal and S&M..
only problem is, i'm not entirely comfortable with it as i said

I wouldn't really say that S&M is ''nothing out of the ordinary'' to be honest.

If you don't want to do it, then don't. Sex is a two way thing, it's not all about pleasing him.

Also, there's a big difference between having a fantasy and wanting to do it in real life. That's like me saying my fantasy is to get through an entire rugby team in one evening, it's nice to think about but I'm not going to do it in real life.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 19

Life_peer

19

Original post by jasminejasmine

alright, ive been with my boyfriend for six months and i love him alot. he loves me too.
the only problem is in the bedroom..
we had a fantastic sex life until about a week ago when he began to open up about his sexual fantasies and revealed he'd like me to do things to him that im not entirely comfortable with. its not affecting out relationship.. i want to please him but i dont want to perform acts that im not 100% about..
help?!

Be sure to remember that it is not your fault and that he is the one who requires more than it is usual. You might not be the type, but some women are disappointed of themselves in cases such as this, as far as I know.

I advise you to try to find a compromise (probably other "fantasies" you do not have problem with and satisfy his need for something unconventional) and if it does not work, do not fulfill his expectations. Your preferences are of the same importance as his. If he really loves you, he will get over it.

can't satisfy my boyfriend sexually

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