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    Hey

    I started medical school this September but I am not enjoying it at all… I found nice people to hang out with during freshers week so didn’t go to any of the freshers events since I don’t drink and don’t like clubbing… but after lectures started people got into small cliques and the people I used to hang out with stopped hanging out with me and now I really don’t have any proper friends at uni… just people I sit next to in lectures and I hate it… this has made me very homesick and this term I’ve been crying to my parents on the phone and they are upset because of me – I have stopped telling them how lonely and depressed I feel at uni because they are disappointed and upset because of me.

    I moved rooms because I wanted to be catered but this had made it worse because my new flat doesn’t have any medics and I am lonely. My flatmates are noisy as well so I can’t concentrate on work either… I feel so depressed and lonely and I hate the idea of going back to uni…I know I will get homesick and feel exactly the same way.

    I talk to a lot of people at uni but they are in their small groups already so they leave me out of things that they are doing… I thought I would give it more effort next term but I feel like it won’t make any difference because people are close to each other already.

    Has anyone gone through something similar before? Could you guys give me advice on what I can do from next term to make it better please?

    I really hate my medical school– it’s not what I expected it to be so that doesn’t help either….it’s quite small so there aren’t many people on my course and there aren’t any good societies that interest me.

    Next term the workload is going to go up so I am really scared that I am not going to cope if I am not feeling good. I only managed to get through this term because I was going home every weekend for driving lessons so the fact that I was lonely and depressed didn’t really register but every time I was in my flat, I was really lonely. I really don’t want this…please help?

    Sorry for the long post
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    I don't mean to sound rude but you need to man up and deal with the situation in the best way possible, which is keep on top of work and try and make friends to be less lonely, and even if you don't make friends, block out any thought's about being lonely, listen to music, anything! You'll find that making friends will happen sub-consciously, don't give up though, you've worked hard to get there, don't let anything you may regret get in the way of what you need to do.
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    ive been in the exact same position just at college rather then uni so I guess at least I had my parents.
    tbh what i did was just got my head down with work and managed to work really hard to get better grades. After I was happy with my work I then put myself out there abit more. How about asking some of the friends you used to talk to out for a quiet drink at the pub (or coke for you!) that might help.
    I know it feels so bad and all you want to do is stay in but It can get better but you have to put the effort in to make it better. Trust me it really does work! Good Luck, i'm sure you'll be fine! xx
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    It's a shame that you don't like drinking or clubbing. Have you ever been clubbing sober? Because it's not thattt bad. Better than staying in alone anyway.

    You say there are no medics in your new halls.. just make friends with other people who aren't medics?
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    I would try and stick it out, join some clubs and societies in refreshers fair, even if you only have a small interest in them, it might lead to something bigger. If you were to leave medical school you probably wouldnt be able to get a place in another because of them seeing it as a lack of commitment to medicine.
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    Thank you for your replies... I have decided to make more effort next term - we have refreshers week next term so I've decided to go to as many events as i possibly can and get to know the people i aleady know better... i'm just worried that it won't help because people have formed their friendship goups already... i've been trying to get to know some people i meet at dinner better the last few weeks but its quite hard because they are all very close.... may be i just need to spend more time with them? invite them over to my flat a couple of times?
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    (Original post by becky.fm)
    It's a shame that you don't like drinking or clubbing. Have you ever been clubbing sober? Because it's not thattt bad. Better than staying in alone anyway.

    You say there are no medics in your new halls.. just make friends with other people who aren't medics?
    Speaking as a non-drinker, I would say it's terrible - there's nothing for you to really go other than watch your friends enjoy the night, because there's little enjoyable about clubbing itself.

    Last time I tried, I left halfway through. No one even realised.
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    (Original post by mv2010)
    Thank you for your replies... I have decided to make more effort next term - we have refreshers week next term so I've decided to go to as many events as i possibly can and get to know the people i aleady know better... i'm just worried that it won't help because people have formed their friendship goups already... i've been trying to get to know some people i meet at dinner better the last few weeks but its quite hard because they are all very close.... may be i just need to spend more time with them? invite them over to my flat a couple of times?
    yes yes yes dont worry ive been in completley the same situation and I thought that noone would take notice because everyone had formed there friendship groups already, trust me friendship groups change ALL THE TIME. its really good your going to do that and I wish you the best of luck!
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    I can see how you feel, but if you want my advice use facebook. It's a fantastically easy way to meet people, just add them and write on their wall "Hey we go to the same uni (Perhaps be better if you mention the same course) you alright?" and get a conversation flowing through that. Even if their in a different year, if you feel socially awkward at times and don't feel confident meeting new people then it's a great way to get to meet people and if it goes wrong, just stop talking to them and find someone else.
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    (Original post by TheSownRose)
    Speaking as a non-drinker, I would say it's terrible - there's nothing for you to really go other than watch your friends enjoy the night, because there's little enjoyable about clubbing itself.

    Last time I tried, I left halfway through. No one even realised.
    Poor you, that's cold!
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    (Original post by mv2010)
    Hey

    I started medical school this September but I am not enjoying it at all… I found nice people to hang out with during freshers week so didn’t go to any of the freshers events since I don’t drink and don’t like clubbing… but after lectures started people got into small cliques and the people I used to hang out with stopped hanging out with me and now I really don’t have any proper friends at uni… just people I sit next to in lectures and I hate it… this has made me very homesick and this term I’ve been crying to my parents on the phone and they are upset because of me – I have stopped telling them how lonely and depressed I feel at uni because they are disappointed and upset because of me.

    I moved rooms because I wanted to be catered but this had made it worse because my new flat doesn’t have any medics and I am lonely. My flatmates are noisy as well so I can’t concentrate on work either… I feel so depressed and lonely and I hate the idea of going back to uni…I know I will get homesick and feel exactly the same way.

    I talk to a lot of people at uni but they are in their small groups already so they leave me out of things that they are doing… I thought I would give it more effort next term but I feel like it won’t make any difference because people are close to each other already.

    Has anyone gone through something similar before? Could you guys give me advice on what I can do from next term to make it better please?

    I really hate my medical school– it’s not what I expected it to be so that doesn’t help either….it’s quite small so there aren’t many people on my course and there aren’t any good societies that interest me.

    Next term the workload is going to go up so I am really scared that I am not going to cope if I am not feeling good. I only managed to get through this term because I was going home every weekend for driving lessons so the fact that I was lonely and depressed didn’t really register but every time I was in my flat, I was really lonely. I really don’t want this…please help?

    Sorry for the long post
    Stick with it. I don't mean to sound nasty but thousands of people would love to be in your position right now in medical school. Just think in 5 or so years you'll nearly be a qualified doctor
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    (Original post by calannra)
    Stick with it. I don't mean to sound nasty but thousands of people would love to be in your position right now in medical school. Just think in 5 or so years you'll nearly be a qualified doctor
    That's not really a good enough reason to stay unhappy - other people wouldn't be.
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    (Original post by mv2010)
    Hey

    I started medical school this September but I am not enjoying it at all… I found nice people to hang out with during freshers week so didn’t go to any of the freshers events since I don’t drink and don’t like clubbing… but after lectures started people got into small cliques and the people I used to hang out with stopped hanging out with me and now I really don’t have any proper friends at uni… just people I sit next to in lectures and I hate it… this has made me very homesick and this term I’ve been crying to my parents on the phone and they are upset because of me – I have stopped telling them how lonely and depressed I feel at uni because they are disappointed and upset because of me.

    I moved rooms because I wanted to be catered but this had made it worse because my new flat doesn’t have any medics and I am lonely. My flatmates are noisy as well so I can’t concentrate on work either… I feel so depressed and lonely and I hate the idea of going back to uni…I know I will get homesick and feel exactly the same way.

    I talk to a lot of people at uni but they are in their small groups already so they leave me out of things that they are doing… I thought I would give it more effort next term but I feel like it won’t make any difference because people are close to each other already.

    Has anyone gone through something similar before? Could you guys give me advice on what I can do from next term to make it better please?

    I really hate my medical school– it’s not what I expected it to be so that doesn’t help either….it’s quite small so there aren’t many people on my course and there aren’t any good societies that interest me.

    Next term the workload is going to go up so I am really scared that I am not going to cope if I am not feeling good. I only managed to get through this term because I was going home every weekend for driving lessons so the fact that I was lonely and depressed didn’t really register but every time I was in my flat, I was really lonely. I really don’t want this…please help?

    Sorry for the long post

    girl or boy?
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    (Original post by TheSownRose)
    That's not really a good enough reason to stay unhappy - other people wouldn't be.
    Fair enough, it is only my opinion.
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    (Original post by calannra)
    Fair enough, it is only my opinion.
    Was kind of what I was thinking too.

    To the OP - just stick at it. Lots of work at the moment, stay cool and you will start to make friends, just because you are meeting people. It does happen. Stay confident.
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    I guess you could say i feel the same way about uni. Don't get me wrong i've made friends here, but i can't ignore the fact that everywhere i look , people are enjoying themselves on a level i can't comprehend whilst being here. It got off to a bad start with my halls. I was put in a flat with people alot older than me, meaning that we're civil but we never hang out. I tend to rely on other groups to tell me when they're going for lunch/dinner etc (we're catered) and sometimes people forget to tell me or leave their phone in their rooms and i end up eating alone. I came to the conclusion that something needs to change. I know myself, and i know that im not BEING myself here. I simply don't like the place, and have decided to leave. Im currently waiting to hear back from new universities and im back home feeling like myself again. Im sorry that your parents aren't as supportive as mine were, but you're an adult now and you need to start making decisions based on yourself and how you're feeling, not how its going to make your parents feel. In the end, things will always work out. Go with your instinct and try to stay positive in the process.
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    Hey guys, I need help filling in my crossword puzzle. 7 letter word, "to intentionally cause one's own death"...any ideas?
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    (Original post by Zweihander)
    Hey guys, I need help filling in my crossword puzzle. 7 letter word, "to intentionally cause one's own death"...any ideas?
    Anhero

    ... wait, you said 7 letters.

    Nevermind.
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    Dont panic. Dont go home too much.
    Join a society that meets regularly eg music/rambling/dancing and go every week. Get involved in the uni drama society etc.
    Organise your study time to have a good work/leisure balance. Stick to first principles when learning all the new stuff and dont get too bogged down in detail.
    Sit next to people you like the look of at mealtimes and always sit next to them and at some point you will end up chatting. Persevere and it definitely gets better.
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    once again thanks to everyone... after reading some of the posts, i feel like i can do this... just need to put more effort in. I'm on my holiday now and all i can think about is the fact that i just don't want to go back... i used to go to this scout group thing a few years back and i remember everytime the car was close to the building and my dad was going to drop me off, i felt really sick and nauseous all because i hated going there... i get the exact same feeling everytime i think about uni now... i just have no idea why - uni is what i was looking forward to for as long as i can remember and i hate the place.... but i don't want to throw this opportunity away because not many people get this chance so i guess i just have to prepare myself for it during the holidays... do any of few ever feel like this about uni?

    I am going to try harder next term and if i still feel lonely then i will just concentrate more on work and leave as little free time as possible so i don't have the chance to think about anything else
 
 
 
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